Aka: airing out my grievances

(Also bored)

Stop. Look at this character:

Amazing, isn't she? Why, some would say she's perfect. And they'd be right! Of course, some would disagree, but those are just uncivilized heretics with no taste (/lh, /s) and we don't listen to heretics, mmkay?

(That splash art, wow...)

So, you'd think, her sig must be as beautiful as she is, no?

And it is! Elegant, refined, perfect! Stats fit her, look fits her. C'est magnifique!

But... You're out of primogems and can't pull on the weapon banner 😞

Ah, but you've heard she has a good f2p option! Well, which is it, you ask. It must be this one, no?

It looks so much like her sig, it's equally beautiful and elegant and it has a name that matches her and her story perfectly. It was made for her, how could it not be!?

Well, look at those stats again, dear reader.

>ATK

>Bond of Life

💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

... Oh, so which is it, then? Surely not-

Yep. It's this. It's this lump of trash. Literal trash! It's a length of pipe broken off a sewer, for Foçalors' sakes!

It's ugly, it's rusty and it'll get her gloves all dirty and unwashable and, hey, why the hell is street bandit ass weapon not the ATK one?? It's so much more aggressive like-

And, hah! Can't even forge it. Nooo, you'll have to fish your ass off for this piece of-

Hoyo looked at us, and said:

"You want Furina de Fontaine, elegant and beautiful? Nah.

Here you go. If you're not a whale, all you're getting is...

Furina de Fontaine, Sewage Knight. "

... Thank you for coming to my TED talk!