Born to Be Bad is one of the two deleted songs from Disney's film A Goofy Movie.
Background[]
Prior to the decision to make Goofy work as a children's photographer with Pete, he would have instead worked in an office under a boss named Don, who would have sang "Born to Be Bad" to torment Goofy.[1] Ultimately, neither Don nor the song made it into the movie.
Lyrics[]
(dialogue)
Don:
All kids are rotten.
Goofy:
Aw, not Max. We're best buddies!
Don:
You think? It's hopeless. Take it from an expert. Rough him up.
Goofy:
Aw, I don't believe that.
Don:
Believe it, Goof.
Don: (singing)
At nine years old, he's such a dear,
Then he turns ten, and he won't kiss you.
At twelve, the dear has pierced his ear.
And by thirteen, he's started this, Goof.
(Goofy: What's this?)
You pray it's just a phase he's going through,
Until one day, his hair is blue,
That's when you realize it's true.
They're born to be bad,
Born to drive you mad.
He has the manners of Attila,
He trips old ladies in the street.
His new friends look like Godzilla.
They carry two-by-fours,
They rob convenience stores,
Just for recreation.
(Evil laughter)
So woe to every dad,
Your kid... is born to be bad!
(Goofy: Gawrsh.)
(Don: (spoken) Yes, Goof. Forget your years of experience. These days, he's getting his advice from a spark plug, and it's all downhill from there. Gangs, felonies, MTV)
You'll ask yourself when he's sixteen,
"When was the last time he was sober?"
You'll think he's dressed for Halloween,
Then realize it's not October.
And when did he decide to shave his head?
When did his room become co-ed?
Remember, Goof: It's like I said.
Hoo-hoo! Hoo-hoo!
They're born to be bad,
Born to make you sad.
Just when you think you're going batty,
And this is all some cruel dream,
He goes and blows up Cincinnati... (*explosion*)
And after all the shame,
Guess who they're gonna blame
For the devastation?
Ha-ha!
Guess who?
Why, no one else but you
Just say you ruined the kids
With all you did and didn't do
(Evil laughter)
You're doomed like every dad
'Cause kids are all contemptible
Despicable, degenerate and just...
(Goofy: Wait a minute!)
Plain...
(Goofy: I'm innocent, I tell you!)
Yoo-oo-oo!
They're born to be bad!
(spoken: Have a nice day!)
