Mendes

This is an important book to read! (I love how many times I can say that in a book review at the moment, there are so many good books about LGBTQ and autistic people being written).

As far as I am aware, there is no proven science on whether or not autistic people are more likely to be LGBTQ , but anecdotally, it does seem that a large proportion of the autistic population are LGBTQ . And yet there are still health professionals who don't believe that you can be bother autistic and gay, or autistic and trans. There are health professionals who will argue against a diagnosis of autism because the person in question is also queer, or will tell a trans person that they are only trans because of their autism, and therefore shouldn't be allowed to transition. Obviously this needs to change. And books like this are the start of that process.

(If anyone does know of any scientific data exploring this connection, please, hit me up with it! The topic is fascinating.)

Each chapter of this book is someone's story, in their own words. There are stories from autistic people themselves, talking about their journeys of discovery both in regards to their autism and their gender identity and/or sexuality. I found these the most interesting. There are also some chapters from the point of view of family members and partners (written with the permission of the autistic person in question) that talk about finding out about the autism diagnosis, or LGBTQ identity, and about the positives and negatives of relationships with autistic people, and how they support each other. The book is edited in part by someone who specialises in couples therapy, and many of the contributors to the book are in therapy or have been in therapy in the past, and so are in good places in their lives to discuss this kind of thing with good insight.

The end of the book sums up the different themes that the stories touch on, and then there is a Q&A with the editors who discuss the intersection of autism and LGBTQ identities, from a therepeutic perspective.

Some of the stories can be a little repetitive at times, but on the whole are enjoyable and interesting to read. The book could have been more diverse, but this is touched on by the editors, who explain that they drew on their therapy participants for the book, meaning that most people in it are from a particular location, are at a good point in their lives because of having had therapy for a while, are from similar backgrounds, and, because of the nature of being LGBTQ , are all in a position where they do not need to worry about being outed to family or the general public.

I have a quibble, as someone who identifies as bi, with the definition used at the beginning of the book. Bi is actually used by contributors to the book in a number of different ways, so the strict definition of 'two genders' at the beginning of the book seems unnecessary, and is not how many people who identify as bi define their sexuality.… (more)