How to Be an Adult in Relationships Quotes

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How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving by David Richo
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How to Be an Adult in Relationships Quotes Showing 1-30 of 79
“Self-actualization is not a sudden happening or even the permanent result of long effort. The eleventh-century Tibetan Buddhist poet-saint Milarupa suggested: "Do not expect full realization; simply practice every day of your life." A healthy person is not perfect but perfectible, not a done deal but a work in progress. Staying healthy takes discipline, work, and patience, which is why our life is a journey and perforce a heroic one.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“At every stage of life, our inner self requires the nurturance of loving people attuned to our feelings and responsive to our needs who can foster our inner resources of personal power, lovability, and serenity. Those who love us understand us and are available to us with an attention, appreciation, acceptance, and affection we can feel. They make room for us to be who we are.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We don’t fear physical closeness because we fear proximity itself. Most of us earnestly want physical contact with those who love us. Rather we fear what we will feel when we get too close. The real fear, then, is of ourselves. This fear is not something to rebuke ourselves for. It is our deepest vulnerability, the very quality that makes us most lovable.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Most people think of love as a feeling but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Real love does not come off the rack; it is uniquely tailored by the lover to the beloved. Part of the pain of letting go of someone who really loved you is letting go of being loved in that special way.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Bread takes the effort of kneading but also requires sitting quietly while the dough rises with a power all its own.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“there is nothing to take over if you are not putting up any resistance.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Our identity is like a kaleidoscope. With each turn we reset it not to a former or final state but to a new one that reflects the here-and-now positions of the pieces we have to work with. The design is always new because the shifts are continual. That is what makes kaleidoscopes, and us, so appealing and beautiful.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Thus, we strive for intimacy with the whole universe, not just with one person.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“When I see I am nothing, that is wisdom. When I see I am everything, that is love. My life is a movement between these two. —NISARGADATTA MAHARAJ”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“It is not that practice makes perfect but that practice is perfect, combining effort with an openness to grace.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“spirituality. In healthy intimate relationships we do not seek more than 25 percent of our nurturance from a partner; we learn to find the rest within ourselves.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Once we love ourselves, people no longer look good to us unless they are good for us.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“In pain with you, and yet I could not go. I stayed since nothing better came along. I loved you by default or just for show, My life a whistled flat unechoed song. I groped for notches in our dun abyss, And looked for more in lonely only less. I shunned the path adorned with signs to bliss, And stood the loyal ground of wait or guess. It took the tender you to shift the scene, Bold arsonist beneath our tinder stage! I then in friendly fire to earth careen And from our props and ashes disengage. I begged you long with such a silent ache In fear of, wish for mercy for my sake. What Love Feels Like”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We feel loved when we receive attention, acceptance, appreciation, and affection, and when we are allowed the freedom to live in accord with our own deepest needs and wishes. These”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“If you use sarcasm, ridicule, teasing, pinching, tickling, or barbed kidding at times, make a commitment to cease using these passive-aggressive weapons against your partner or anyone.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We hear with our ears; we listen with our intution and our heart.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“As long as you hold onto wanting something from the outside, you will be dissatisfied because there is a part of you that you are still not totally owning. . . . How can you be complete and fulfilled if you believe that you cannot own this part [of yourself ] until somebody else does something? . . . If it is conditional, it is not totally yours. —A. H. ALMAAS”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Love is experienced differently by each of us, but for most of us five aspects of love stand out. We feel loved when we receive attention, acceptance, appreciation, and affection, and when we are allowed the freedom to live in accord with our own deepest needs and wishes.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Attention from others leads to self-respect. Acceptance engenders a sense of being inherently a good person. Appreciation generates a sense of self-worth. Affection makes us feel lovable. Allowing gives us the freedom to pursue our own deepest needs, values, and wishes.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We feel loved when we receive attention, acceptance, appreciation, and affection, and when we are allowed the freedom to live in accord with our own deepest needs and wishes.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“engaging with our grief is a form of self-nurturance and liberation from neediness. Paradoxically, to enter our wounded feelings fully places us on the path to healthy intimacy.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Mindfulness is an ancient meditation mode in which we let go of our fears, our attachments to control and being right, our expectations and entitlements, and our judgments of others.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We cannot attune if we assume certain feelings are right and others wrong. To attune to someone, we need neutrality toward all feelings, moods, and inner states and the fearless openness of mindfulness.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Beings as complex as ourselves need retreats from others to explore the depths of our character and our destiny. We need regular periods of solitude to replenish ourselves, to locate new sources of creativity and self-knowledge, and to discover possibilities in our souls that are invisible when we are with others.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We are not alone in our psychological or spiritual evolution. A higher power than ego, wiser than our intellect and more enduring than our will, kicks in to assist us. Even now, as you read this, many bodhisattvas and saints are gathering to become your mighty companions on your heart’s path.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“Finally, when the desperados of the neurotic ego—fear, grasping, expectation, judgment, control, attachment, and so forth—threaten our psychic domain, it is time for mindfulness. Sit quietly or walk slowly as you contemplate each stressful assault and let go of it with a label such as “just a thought” or with an affirmation such as “I let go of control in this predicament and let the chips fall where they may.” Then expand your personal concern into universal loving-kindness, that is, mature love: “May all beings let go of whatever stands in the way of their happiness.” This is how we move from ego-love to eco-love!”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“We sit as a practice for how we will act throughout the day. Mindfulness, however, involves more than sitting. It is moment by moment non-clinging to ego. It is the simplicity that results when we experience reality without the clutter produced by the decorative arts of ego.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“To will is truly to want something, to choose both the goal and the means to goal. This means accepting the work and the risks involved in seeing something through. To wish, on the other hand, is only to be enamored of the goal.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
“In adult life, he knows how to internalize others’ support and thereby gain the power to support himself.”
David Richo, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

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