Don Bradshaw

“Yeah, but they only know I suck dick in the abstract.”
― Thomas Carver, Birch & Key

“NO reader has ANY obligation to an author, whether it be to leave a review or to write a "constructive" one. I put out a product. You are consumers of that product. Since when does that mean you have to kiss my ass? Hey, I like Pop-Tarts and eat them a few times a year; since when does that mean I'm obligated to support Kellogg's in any way except legally purchasing the Pop-Tarts before I eat them? I wasn't aware that purchasing and consuming a product meant I was under some sort of fucking thrall in which I'm only allowed to either praise the Pop-Tart (which to be honest isn't hard, especially the S'mores flavor) or, if I am going to criticize a flavor, offer a specific and detailed analysis as to why, phrased in as inoffensive and gentle a manner as possible so as not to upset the gentle people at Kellogg's."

[Something in the Water? (blog post; January 9, 2012)]”
― Stacia Kane

“You don't apologize to people because they are right and you aren't. You apologize to people because you hurt them. Whether you meant to or not.”
― Dirk Hunter, After School Activities

“After our little mutual masturbation session, I had expected him to be distant and weird, but he wasn't: he acted like it was an ordinary, normal thing for guys to do for each other. Wouldn't that be a lovely world?”
― Thomas Carver, Birch & Key