CJ's Reviews > Die for Me

**NOTE: I am updating my reviews. Y'know: older, wiser, more eloquent.**

Die For Me seduced me into reading it in a fit of teenage angst. Which is not a bad thing. Everybody needs a good paranormal romance every now and then. Unfortunately Die For Me fell flat of my expectations, particularly in the realms of character development, world-building, and the grossest injustice: setting.

I did enjoy some aspects of the book. I appreciate Plum's direction, by straying from the far more trodden paths of vampire and werewolf mythology and instead trying her hands on revenants. Revenants were a common European tale in the Middle Ages that the people of the time used to explain ghost sightings where the "ghosts" appeared to be corporeal. So kind of like zombies, but less gross in an eat-your-brains type of way. Neat.

I also approve of her attempt to set her novel somewhere besides a midwestern American town no one's ever heard of. That gets old so fast, and the world is a huge place: not everyone comes from Small-Town USA.

However, my biggest pet peeve ever is that it is excruciatingly obvious that Plum has never spent any significant time in Paris. I would guess maybe a tourist visit. Maybe two. She fails to deliver any sort of comprehensive accurate depiction of the city, instead describing with dream-like quality a hazy, watered down version of what an American imagines France to be like (I am an American too, so I'm not pointing fingers here). There is barely any French in this novel, which is disappointing, and no French culture. "But the French are predominantly white," you say. "They don't have their own culture." Ah ha! That is where you are wrong, person who thinks that. While it may not be so different from American culture as Shanghai, the Parisians do have a very strict set of non-written rules. For example: pretend to not speak English around obnoxious tourists. Charge them too much if they speak loudly and slowly at you. Keep them away from the best local places and steer them to over-priced tourist locations. Do NOT make eye contact on the Metro. Things like this. There were no descriptions of suspicious-looking puddles or a constant smell of urine in this novel. There was no Italian lady standing on your heels because she has no concept of personal space. There was no questionable man on a corner selling wrist watches, and I pray to God he's wearing clothes underneath that trench coat. Paris is rude, dirty, gritty, smelly, and not-entirely-safe. That doesn't make it any less beautiful. Plum failed to capture Paris in any sort of reality besides a dream. As a side note I know this because, as I previously mentioned, while I may be an American I am a Swiss American and lived in Basel for 8 years. Paris is about 3 hours away by train, and it is a city I know well and have been to countless times.

The epitome of this lack of knowledge of Paris comes in a scene where Vincent takes Kate for a romantic evening for two. Get this: he rents a rowboat so they can sit on the Seine and watch the Eiffel Tower twinkle in privacy. HA! If you have ever been to Paris that made you laugh. First of all, the view of the Eiffel Tower from the Seine sucks. The banks are elevated as a flooding prevention measure, and the bridges block the view too. Just ask anybody who's been suckered into a boat tour. Secondly, the area is always busy. Between tourists oohing and aahing at the Tower, the never-ending and decidedly angry traffic that is always present, the junkies on the bank of the river, and the water traffic of tourists and barges, there is absolutely no way that they were alone in their own little universe. And lastly, the Seine smells nasty on a good day. After a hot summer day in an open air rowboat? That water is disgusting. No way that would be romantic, they'd pass out from their smell or trying to hold their breath.

While I understand that not everybody knows these things, the author should, because the characters would. That is why research is so imperative. Paris is a real city with millions of people and thousands of tourists. You can't just make that up (it's one reason why the Small-Town USA trope is so popular, because nobody cares to fact check you). But Die For Me is an injustice upon all Parisians.

Moving on…
The characters are completely 2D. They're paper-thin. I couldn't care less about them. For example, Kate is newly orphaned. She exhibits no grief or mourning behavior. It was pretty obvious the only reason she is orphaned in the first place is so the author doesn't have to deal with pesky questions like "Wouldn't someone notice or care if she was traipsing around Paris at 4am?" Kate doesn't care about her dead parents, so why should I? I should clarify: this is not due to some event where Kate had bad or abusive parents, but more due to poor writing.

Finally I shall make a list of things that make Die For Me seem like a cheap version of Twilight. Mildly spoilery but I tried to be as vague as possible.
• Instant inexplicable sexual attraction revealing some deep mystical "connection"
• The love interest comes off as creepy, yet Kate is unafraid, when a normal person would pack their bags and run
• Kate trusts Vincent based on their "connection" and not any evidence on his character.
• Mysterious bad boy has a secret he does not want Kate to find out (lowkey does), and drops ominous hints to help her NOT figure it out.
• Kate discovers the truth by Googling it.
• Kate is the outsider in a tight-knit community of non-humans that largely disapprove of her presence but acquiesce to Vincent's wishes because "he deserves to not be lonely anymore"
• There is one girl non-human who becomes Kate's best friend.
• Kate, upon coming to her senses, realizes she's gotten herself into an insane situation and tries to take a break from the whole undead thing.
• Alas, the separation is too much for Vincent and Kate, who are Meant To Be. They have been in love for three weeks, after all.
• The whiny mentality. Both Kate and Vincent have thoughts along the lines of "I'm not good enough. He/She is perfect. I don't deserve them. Blah blah, wah wah ect."
• The ancient and immortal all-powerful villain wants to exact revenge on the super hot immortal loverboy by going after his teenage girlfriend instead.

Anything seem familiar?

Amy Plum has an awesome opportunity to create her own mythology, her own world in Die For Me but only gives it a half-hearted attempt. We don't get to see the world of the revenants, are there more besides just in France? Are there any outside of Europe? Do the local myths have any relevance to revenants? AKA American revenants be more zombie-like? The world and the rules of being a revenant are left largely untouched, besides some basic explanations.

My recommendation: I'd give Die For Me a pass. It might be good for a quick, brainless read, but it didn't even satisfy me as a cheesy romance. Even then it might not be worth your time.

And if you are familiar with Paris, I would recommend avoiding entirely. This book will infuriate you.

That being said, I will look out for Plum in the future to see if, after gaining some experience, she can put her next intriguing idea to print.