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Trivia at St. Nick's (2024)
Trivia at St. Nicks-All the wrong answers
When students go home for Christmas break at a university in Vermont, those sad souls left behind (or just live there), participate in a 45-year tradition of Christmas trivia at Nick's Bar. Celeste (Tammin Sursok) is obsessed with winning the trivia tournament, but is thrown when her ringer bails and she's stuck with Max, a football coach (Brant Daugherty) as their sixth and required member of the trivia team.
Trivia is fun, but this movie was absurd and not in a funny, laugh at yourself way. There are some funny one-liners, but it's certainly not enough to carry the contrived story line that somehow tries to be funny and sincere, but fails at both.
One liners
-I'm a football coach, not a wheel magician!" When he can't change a tire.
-"If you'd like, I'd be happy to share my syllabus..." Professor, keep your pants on. Really a dick joke?
-After asking a nun to be on the trivia team, the nun replies, "I will pray for you. Hard." Wow, the nun thinks you're silly.
-"Belay! You gotta Belay!" Best rock-climbing advice ever.
Goofy notes
-A whole week of trivia nights is a bit much, even for die hard trivia buffs.
-This movie was filmed on location in Connecticut. Why was it placed in Vermont?
-Shouting your trivia answers in a crowded bar is a great way to lose to other people who can hear you.
-Everyone drinks different colorful holiday beverages - no one has any ice.
-The Stan trophy had to be worth at least $7, but no more.
-And who was Stan in the photo? They show him like an inside joke. Help us out.
-When they eat cookies, the sound department didn't add the ever-present crunch, like every other Hallmark movie. This is the right decision.
Measuring Christmas Magic: None, except the super meta final trivia category - Hallmark Christmas movies! Nice work there.
Cast Kudos: Brian McCarthy who plays Nick the Quiz Master. Nick dons a different holiday outfit each night, which helps show the different events, and is a nice running joke. Give Nick a movie.
Alternative Titles: The Greatest Trivia Tournament Ever; Trivia for the Lonely; Just go home for the Christmas holiday.
Aired on Hallmark on Nov 8, watched Nov. 9.
Santa Tell Me (2024)
Santa Tell Me: A fast-paced holiday romp
Olivia (Erin Krakow) gets her big break as a TV home designer for a holiday makeover on Christmas Eve, she's stunned that the network hires Chris (Daniel Lissing) to oversee the TV and live reveal on Christmas Eve. Throw in a magic (and changing) letter from the real Santa that says her true love is named Nick and she has to find him by Christmas, well hijinks ensues.
This sounds a lot more complicated than it is. And to be honest, I had extremely low expectations for this one. The trailer and commercials were awful. Having a lead interested in three Nicks (and a Chris) is not my thing, but they play it cool and funny. Olivia proceeds to give different Nicks a concussion, black eye and for good measure, poison another one. The Nicks woo Olivia hard, and all seem nice, yet she's not all in, despite spending all of her free time on dates during the biggest moment of her career. Yes, she just might have a better connection with another fella-the aforementioned Chris (if that is your real name).
Despite my best efforts to not like this movie, they turned me. It was good. While it did seem like they crunched three or four different holiday themes into one movie, somehow it works, and I had more fun that I could have anticipated in this fast-paced movie. Yes, fast-paced . . . A Hallmark movie. What is the world coming to?
Goofy notes
-Stop trying to make Seattle snowy. It ain't a thing.
-The train in the final scene is leaving for Spokane, Washington. Hello, my hometown.
-Three weeks to fix a house is the least believable thing in this movie. They film Hallmark movies in the summer so they can be ready by winter. Seriously?
-Dating three or four people at the same time is never a good idea.
-If the Nicks do get their own dating show, I would watch that.
Measuring Christmas Magic: Yes, a magic letter from Santa is key. Plus taking a horse drawn carriage across Seattle in less than nine minutes on Christmas Eve is some kind of traffic magic.
Cast Kudos: Nick A (Benjamin Ayres). Who actually seems believable as a pediatric neurosurgeon.
Alternative Titles: So Many Nicks for Christmas; In the Nick of Time; Olivia Dates so many Nicks.
Originally aired on Hallmark on Nov. 9, watched Nov. 10.
Holiday Mismatch (2024)
Holiday Mismatch, where moms are the real focus
Recent retiree Barbara (Beth Broderick) joins the town's Christmas Committee to keep herself busy, but immediately clashes with Kath (Caroline Rhea). Barbara is stiff, on time and a wiz in a spreadsheet. Kath is a free spirit, and a bit nutty, but also full of Christmas joy. They both just so happen to have young, single children. The moms use an app for parents to match their kids (terrifying). Yes, the kids match on the app and quickly in real life.
This movie really focuses on two relationships, but in a unique way. In a shared A/B story, the mom's relationship from enemies to friends, and the kid's story from "fake dating" to actually dating take nearly equal screen time.
The chemistry between Beth Broderick and Caroline Rhea is wonderful, obviously from their years of working together as aunts on Sabrina the Teenage Witch. They couldn't have found better actors to take on these roles. Very authentic ribbing and timing.
Our romantic leads are Shane (Jon McLaren) and Lauren (Maxine Denis). They are great together and could have held the full focus of the story with more material.
My major nitpick is the fake dating. After Shane and Lauren go on a real date together, they decide to flip the script and fake date to get their parents to stop setting them up with people (which we never see happen by the way). There is no logical (or Christmas Magical) reason to make this decision. Just date, you hot people! That's the way to go. The parents would have stopped meddling if you were really dating, and you definitely liked each other, so do that.
It's refreshing to see Lauren working hard as a co-owner of her architecture firm and trying to get a project done. So often in Hallmark, we'd see her trying to get a promotion from a male CEO, or ice queen boss over Christmas. They also give a realistic reason why the building work needs to get done by the end of the year-building code changes on Jan. 1. I don't know if it exactly works like that, but I applaud the effort.
Goofy notes
-Only one "witch" reference in the whole movie. I expected more.
-"Tying a dead plant to a car" is an interesting way to describe taking a Christmas Tree home.
-I need more of the Christmas rat. This seemed so whacky, and it worked because Shane was really all of us in that situation.
-Shane's theater has a full kitchen behind the seating area, and they don't shut off the lights during a performance. Hmm, I wonder why they are struggling.
-When you do karaoke for "Jingle Bells" you probably don't need to stare quite so intently at the words on the screen.
-Trolly caroling isn't a thing. Is it? Let's get in a wooden bench trolly and hold fake sheet music and sing so nobody else can hear us.
-Why are we always Christmas caroling? Singing did not need to happen this much.
Cast kudos: This is a slam dunk-- Beth Broderick and Caroline Rhea.
Alternative titles: Full Sabotage Christmas; Meddling Moms Christmas; UnMatched for Christmas.
Our Holiday Story (2024)
Our Holiday Story - thank goodness for the B story!
When you already know the ending of the A story, the movie needs to do a good job of showcasing the journey, since the destination is already set. Our Holiday Story brings us on this journey, but the stakes are low and does only a passable job at entertaining along the way.
The A story is the retelling of how Dave (Warren Christie) and Nell (Nikki DeLoach) met 8 years earlier. When we first meet them they are together, married and parents. They are asked to retell this mild tale by the boyfriend of Dave's daughter, who missed a train, forcing her boyfriend to meet the dad and step mom alone.
If the story focused on their nearly decade old romance alone, we'd be in for a snoozefest, but never fear, the B story is here! Johanna (Sydney Scotia) and the aforementioned boyfriend Chris (Gavin Langelo) are having trouble (sorta) expressing their very strong and lasting love for eachother, because you know . . . When you really love someone in that mutual way, the real trouble is saying it . . . Right?
Throw in a job title of comptroller, a Christmas festival, lots of talk of fruit cake and ugly sweaters, missed trains, dead phone batteries, and missed opportunities- oh, and constantly lying and you have the makings of a low stakes, albeit sweet movie.
Cast Kudos: 9 stars for Sydney Scotia. She plays 16 and 24 (I think), well and differently. She's just a joy to watch in this movie because she's so happy with a great smile, but then things go south and you can feel that too.
Alternative titles: A Christmas of Missed Chances; How a Comptroller stole Christmas; Meet the Christmas Parents.
The 5-Year Christmas Party (2024)
Friends to lovers . . . even if it takes 5 years
In the 5-Year Christmas Party, two theater majors spend 5 consecutive Christmases in each other's lives, acting out the highs and the lows of post-college. Unlike many Hallmark movies where a single act of kindness means forever love, this tale is grounded in the realities of real life. Things like jobs, family and dreams matter to the leads, and guide their decisions on relationships or other commitments. Aside from an ending that leaves a bit too much to the imagination, this is a solid, non-Old School Hallmark movie that I would recommend.
Our lead is Katie Findlay, who plays Alice, who really wants to make it in theater as a director. Our leading man is Jordan Fisher, who plays Max, an aspiring actor. Kudos all around. These two are great together and definitely play different versions of themselves over the course of 5-years. Success or failure is subtle, but they showcase the differences well.
Credit to writer Zag Hug, a Hallmark vet, who also wrote the Ghosts of Christmas Always (9 stars), which is one of the best Hallmark movies of all time.
Major kudos to production on this one. Clearly on a budget, we re-use the same party house, kitchen, party venue, alley, parking lot and rooftop-and some of the same actors every year. They dress them up a little (emphasis on little) bit differently each time, but it's reminiscent of a play where moving a chair or changing the lighting signals a different act. Also, the changing of the season montages were great.
This movie is more sincere than fun, which means realistic laughs, love and tears.
Goofy notes
They really hate catering the law firm Christmas party. I need to know more!
Forcing people to become carolers is not a real thing and nobody should do that.
I think Jordan Fisher must be wearing lifts, right? He's great, but she's pretty tall.
They make a joke about oranges and scurvy. I don't think it landed, but I applaud the effort.
I love that they bonded over watching Ashley Williams (Hallmark) movies. Meta!
I feel like these long gaps between seeing each other could have meant they might find another person to love. If I got ghosted for a year, I would probably not be so happy to see the person who did me dirty.
What happened between Daniel (Jeff Avenue) and Micah (Olly Atkins)? They were together for years 2-4, then Micah is MIA in year five? Come on Hallmark. You gave us a gay couple and then didn't stick the landing. Where'd he go?
Cast Kudos: The really, really bad mustache on Jeff Avenue for year 4. Just no.
Alternative titles: The show must go on, for 5-years; Catering my life story; Christmas Party Again; Alice and Max take the long way to love.
A Carol for Two (2024)
A Carol for Two. Final song, can't save it
A final singing number, which is quite catchy and fun, was not enough to save this Broadway dud from getting cancelled from my theater list. Our leads, Violette (Ginna Claire Mason) and Alex (Jordan Litz) work at as singing servers in New York. They have dreams of making it big on Broadway and we're supposed to be rooting for them.
The trouble is the Cyrano de Bergerac storyline where Alex feeds his cousin Brad (Gino Anania) all the info on Violette and somehow almost wins her over with his yule log (don't ask, it ain't sexy). As expected, it all comes crashing down.
Not to put too fine a point on this whole thing, but Brad is the worst. We could have had a helpless in love guy in this part, but he's made to be an absolute fool and a pure annoyance to everyone who knows him. Not loveable, but quite creepy. This character rips a star or two off this movie.
I enjoyed Mason in A Holiday Spectacular (2022, 6 stars) and the under appreciated A Heidelberg Holiday (2023, 7 stars). When she sings the final song, it's magic, but when she's made to sing public domain holiday songs, it's a waste.
Litz too, is better than the material he's given. Let the man sing! I see leading man for many years to come, if given the right material.
Cast Kudos: Hallmark veteran John B. Lowe in a cameo as the glitzy producer. Love that guy.
Alternate titles: Christmas comes to Broadway. Cast for Christmas. Singing for supper.
Originally aired on Hallmark Nov. 1, 2024. Watched Nov. 2, 2024.
The Christmas Charade (2024)
A charade with a twist. Fooled me, so give them some credit
Six stars: Solid. Could be better.
When librarian Whitney, accidently slips into a date with an undercover FBI agent who is trying to stop a jewel heist, she learns that she has more to offer than just fire-safety tips to kids and book readings. This caper flick is entertaining, funny and offers some actual emotions amongst the twisty hijinks.
Rachel Skarsten plays our lead, coupled with Josh (Corey Sevier), playing the exact same tired character he always plays. Sorry, not a fan. Skarsten was the Nanny in The Royal Nanny (2022), which was a dreadful movie where she plays MI5 agent, who has to become a nanny. I guess law enforcement is her typecast? But she's very likeable in this one and surprisingly grounded. I'll continue to watch her movies.
I called the bad guy from the minute we saw him, then turned out to be wrong. So, I love that I was fooled. Nice work there.
Goofy notes section
-They go to a Christmas store, which might as well be Hallmark's Christmas set decoration department to meet Mrs. Claus who makes jewelry as her side hustle. She needs "a few hours" to make an intricate replica necklace complete with a tracking device. Christmas magic anyone?
-Whitney quotes Die Hard, while crawling through air vents. Then declares it the best Christmas movie ever. A bit on the nose, but I'm here for it.
-The game night scene with the parents brings some actual emotion thanks to slow motion looks at our leading man, even if it is Sevier.
-Museum flag poles are very strong to hold two full grown adults. Bonus issue here-Josh doesn't wear any hand protection while sliding down a rope for five or more stories from the rooftop.
-The jewel thief made a curious choice by asking a stranger to help plan the event where she steals multiple artifacts.
Questions remaining
-Was the thief's hubby in on it, or just a finance guy?
Cast Kudos: The very brief appearance of Jefferson Brown, better known as Colton Landry from The Way Home. He plays an agent of some kind jumping from a roof in a movie Whitney watches in the opening scene of this movie. How is that for foreshadowing?
Alternative Titles: Steal the Heart of Christmas; FBI Blind Date; Stop My Parents are Retired FBI!
Originally aired Oct. 26 on Hallmark; watched Oct. 27.
Operation Nutcracker (2024)
How to lose a nutcracker in 7 days
Four stars: Not good. Sad face.
When a movie has the word "operation" in the title, it's usually a sure bet that it will have some sort of detailed, military-style plan at the center of its plot. Not this movie. The operation is "let's go look for a guy named Dave and keep missing him, because he has our nutcracker."
In order for a charity ball to make enough money to build a new hospital wing, the nice rich folks are auctioning off an antique nutcracker. Yes, whatever someone will bid on this nutcracker will build an entire hospital in Boston. It's so fancy in fact that it's brought to Boston in a plain-Jane carry-on bag on a commercial flight. Oh, yeah, and it's just wrapped in a towel-not locked case for protection. Oh, and our dopey leading man allows the bag to be checked and loses it. Yeah, this movie plot is not great.
A few things to watch for if you want to give it a go.
-The fake beard on our leading man in the first act of the movie
-The random men (I counted three) who are dancing/swaying alone in the final dance scene
-On the nose mentions of meet-cute and rom-coms
-Why is Ashley Newbrough always single? She seems so nice.
Cast Kudos: Nobody really stands out, but it's interesting that Patrice Goodman and Darryl Hinds (Dave) both were secondary players in 'Twas the Date Before Christmas. Which aired on Hallmark the weekend before this nutty movie.
Alternative Titles: What happens when you don't use luggage tags; Hospital wings don't cost a thing; Where's Dave?; How to lose a Nutcracker in 7 days.
Scouting for Christmas (2024)
Charming non-traditional family story
Six Stars: Solid. Could be better.
Full disclosure-I was going to skip this one, but I'm glad I didn't. Scouting for Christmas was a charming non-traditional family story. It didn't break new ground but was perfectly enjoyable.
Ten-year-old Brooklyn (Audrey Wise Alvarez) is a Sunny Scout and loves baked goods and the guy who bakes them, Sir Bakes-A-Bunch, William (Carlo Marks). Brooklyn's single mom Angela (Tamera Mowry-Housley), is a busy real estate agent who doesn't like asking for help. She shows up late to things, which is apparently her worst quality as a human. Other than that, she's pretty great.
Brooklyn and Angela enlist Sir Bakes-A-Bunch to audition to be the caterer/goodie table guy for the Sunny Scout holiday ball. The relationship building centers around that story line.
We also meet Dakota (James Paladino) who is Brooklyn's dad, but I'm convinced he is 75% Philadelphia Phillies slugger Bryce Harper. Look him up, you'll see it too.
The meanie is Den Mom Elizabeth (Jaycie Dotin). She is easy to root against in all things. She's judgy and snooty to a "working" mom who can't possibly be a good mom, work and show up to things on time.
This is set in Washington state. They keep showing images of snowy Seattle. That's not really a thing. We have other cities here, too. Maybe visit Leavenworth if you need a snowy Washington town. Also, nobody here has ever said "tri-state area," if anything they would say, "the Northwest" which covers Oregon, Washington and Idaho. Also, we drink coffee (home of Starbucks), not tea.
Funniest line: When Brooklyn is asked what she wants for Christmas, she replies that she wants her dad to come home and her mom to be fun. Brooklyn's friend replies, "Whoa. That's deep. I want an electric scooter."
Cast Kudos: Brooklyn (Audrey Wise Alvarez). She's a very good child actor who is really the driving force of the whole movie.
Alternative Titles: Those who bake a lot, love a lot; Sunny Scout Ball; A baker for Christmas; Christmas Matchmaker Meritt Badge.
Holiday Crashers (2024)
Two OK movies made into one janky one
Two women who work at an "invitation store" (apparently that's a thing) decide to steal leftover invitations and crash extremely elaborate holiday parties a few times because they think their lives are going nowhere. The party crashing isn't even a main theme in the film. It just happens to be a thing they do. I am not recommending this movie, therefore this review contains spoilers.
Lyndsy Fonseca plays Toni, a law school grad, who had a panic attack when taking the Bar Exam and did not become a lawyer (yet). She lives with her invitation store co-worker and bestie Bri, played to perfection by Daniella Monet. Bri likes to organize and give advice-I guess that's her talent..
Toni meets up with Justin (Chris McNally), who is the CEO of an investment company which apparently only has just one lawyer, one office and five or so actual employees. Toni and Justin, despite being model worthy folks, have absolutely no chemistry. Why do they like each other? What thing in Toni makes Justin a better man? What thing that Justin has, makes Toni change her ways. No growth. No good. I could go on about this storyline, but I just didn't buy it. She's a fake lawyer and it's the end of the world for a while.
The secondary love story is way better. Bri meets a valet named Vinny who actually shows an interest in her and looks like he actually likes her. Our first couple should take note. They do some flirting and the big reveal is that he's not a valet, he owns the company which may or may not be a big company. They never really say. But for fantasy sake, I'll say he's loaded. This couple actually gets married at the end of the movie. They are of Indian decent and Bri's wedding dress is a chic Indian gown that was really great. I'd like to see this culture explored more in these movies. They do celebrate Christmas in India. Let's look into that.
It feels like Hallmark had two OK movies and they decided to blend them together and make one janky movie. Bri and Vinny deserved to be the headline couple of this movie. Justice for Bri and Vinny!!
This movie was also not a Christmas movie. It takes place in the winter and people go to holiday parties, but it is not at all about Christmas. This movie fails the substitution test that tells us that if the holiday of Christmas featured in the movie could be swapped out for another holiday without material changes in the plot of said movie, then it's not a Christmas movie. Adding snow, or mountains is not enough. Christmas doesn't even occur in this movie. Huh?
There are no children in Holiday Crashers, despite having multiple pregnant women. Christmas joy is best seen through the eyes of children. Pretty single people don't exude Christmas cheer like a kid.
The lawyer's TV advertisements were very funny. They played Sia's song "Snowman," which is one of the best Christmas songs ever made.
At one point in the film someone says, "Well, she did save us $2 billion." This is not a normal thing to say, or a reasonable excuse for a lie.
This is the second year that Hallmark put Lyndsy Fonseca in a terrible movie. "Where Are You Christmas? (2023) was dreadful. But she starred in the wonderful "Next Stop, Christmas" (2022), so I'll keep rooting for her. Come on Hallmark, help a girl out.
Cast Kudos: Credit to Jag Bal who plays Vinny. I need more Vinny. Genuine fella who you could bring home to the parents.
Alternative titles: Everyone Got a Sitter and Went to a Party; Fake Lawyer for Winter; I lied about being a lawyer, but I'll save you $2 billion anyway; No Kids Christmas.
'Twas the Date Before Christmas (2024)
Love Amy Groening as our lead; really enjoyed it
When Jesse (Amy Groening) learns that her family is planning to cancel her favorite traditions this year, she is devastated. Hoping to save the tradition, she tells her mom that she's got someone special to bring to the festivities. The trouble is, she doesn't. Using a dating app (who among us hasn't) she finds a guy, Bryan (Robert Buckley), willing to spend his Christmas Eve taking part in the Chamberlain Family Christmas Olympics. This movie doesn't fall into the expected trappings of every "fake boyfriend" Christmas movie you've seen before. In fact, they play it pretty loose, which is refreshing and rather enjoyable. The on-screen chemistry between Jesse and Bryan is very much apparent and believable as well.
This was a great movie to kick off the 2024 Countdown to Christmas, even if it's mid-October and my house is decorated for Halloween. It's sweet and funny, but there is one clear reason why: Amy Groening. I've seen her in Santa Summit, sharing the female co-starring role with two others and as a secondary character in several other Hallmark movies. But this is the first lead role I've seen her in. Forgive me if it's not the first. She's excellent. Often we have Hallmark female leads who are a bit-how do I put this nicely-stiff. Groening is anything but stiff. She's playful and funny, and easy to root for. Buckley too, is kind and sweet. Hallmark better get this dude a Christmas tree farm or a failing community center to save ASAP.
Loved it and would watch again.
Cast Kudos: Marcus the stepdad who rules the kitchen and wears a lot of aprons. He is hilarious, but unfortunately, IMDB doesn't even list him as part of the cast, so I can't find his name.
Alternative titles: Blind Date for Christmas; Saving the Christmas Olympics.
Knuckles (2024)
Should have been called Wade
Ok, so nobody would have watched a Wade Wipple show... right? Well that is exactly what Knuckles is. Could the show have actually focused on the title character ? It seems no. Episode 1-2 was fair, bu then it just gets super weird. The family dinner episode and the Broadway musical episode just felt like needless fillers that was just meant to spend budget. For the high production values, they wrote a really bad story. I think they could have made this a 1:45 movie and all the added junk would have been trimmed out. The dad at the end was just dumb. Who is the bad guy? Dad? The evil guy in the robot? No idea. Sad. Pass.
Extended Family (2023)
Very real story and funny too
I was pretty disappointed to see how many poor reviews the show has received. Anyone who has been through divorce knows that it's a painful and difficult time. This show takes that strange scenario, and makes it into something that you can smile and laugh about, even the weird idiosyncrasies of the people involved in it. In the end, it's obvious that everybody in the show cares for each other and they try to make the situation funny. My family has very much enjoyed watching the show and I hope to see more of it. With only 22 minutes or so to get a story across, they have to be basic and obvious, but I've found the writing to be witty and enjoyable.
The Secret Gift of Christmas (2023)
Meghan Ory is delightful in this one. More of her please
This movie owes five of its seven stars to our lead, Meghan Ory, who looks remarkably like Jessica Pare (Mad Men). Yet, that's not her only positive quality. Ory just shines in every scene. She's a personal shopper, because apparently that's a thing. She never talks budget with her clients that we see, but that doesn't seem to be a concern for anyone. She meets a handsome construction guy and through gift giving, falls in love. Don't ask me how it works, but it does. This is a charming movie. I saw a few negative reviews, and I just don't get it. I'm as judgy as the next person, but this was a cute movie that was helped a lot by its leads.
Christmas in Notting Hill (2023)
Maybe soccer fans will enjoy?
OK, truth time. I've never seen Notting Hill, the neighborhood or the movie, so many of the connections of that movie were lost on me, so if you're looking for special insight, ask Julia Roberts, not me. So, we have an English soccer star recovering from an injury and an American school teacher falling for each other. Our American doesn't know who he is, despite the fact that he is the brother of her sister. Hmm. That's the biggest stretch of this film. Credit where credit is due, they shot this thing at least partially in London and the production values show. It's no classic, but it's unique and that's worth a watch.
Five Star Christmas (2020)
A true family ensemble movie
This movie is one of my all-time favorite movies, so I decided to give it a watch with the family, who had not yet seen it. The set up is great. Dad turns the family home into a nice Bed & Breakfast, but doesn't tell the family until they come home for Christmas. The B&B is empty and struggling. But rumor has it that a random guest is a famous blogger whose review could save the place! Naturally, the family pretends to be guests or employees, not family. The results are absolutely hilarious. The love story feels real, as does the family emotion. This one is great. It seems like every Bethany Joy Lenz movie on Hallmark is a hit.
Christmas on Cherry Lane (2023)
Way too much build up, and not enough payoff
For the first twenty minutes of this movie, before the commercial break I was lost. Or maybe disinterested is a better term. Then it closes before the break and says that the three stories we were watching are all actually happening on different timelines. Great, sounds fun. No. It's a slog. The stories are interconnected through the house the ALL live (or lived) in, but it doesn't really come together until the final five minutes of the movie, which left me a lot of time to wonder why I should keep watching. For a movie with Jonathan Bennett, I thought we'd see some funny moments, but no, it was all serious future-dad, fancy dinner chef drama. John Brotherton and Erin Cahill could have just had the whole movie to themselves and we'd have all been better off for it. And another thing, you don't keep having to mention "high oil prices" to tell us the year the events are taking place. We get it . . . Oil crisis. We just don't care.
Round and Round (2023)
Come for the time loop, stay for the fun
Each year Hallmark gives us a Hanukkah movie. For the last several years they have been a bit dry and focused on teaching the rest of the world what Jewish traditions are. Well forget all that. Round and round is a delightfully fun holiday movie that just so happens to feature a story that involves Hanukkah. Rachel gets stuck in a time loop and keeps repeating the same day over and over again. Through her loops she learns things about herself, meets a guy (often), and has a bit of caper-style fun along the way. This was a great movie that surprised me. I'd love to see Hallmark replay this one throughout the season. It's a keeper.
A Merry Scottish Christmas (2023)
Original title: Siblings are annoying in Scotland
Wow, Scotland in the winter looks beautiful. So green. Like you could jump right in the ocean or walk around in a t-shirt without trouble. Wait, it was not summer? This was supposed to be a Christmas movie? Huh. OK then. On to the story, our siblings find out their mother was a secret duchess and they now are in control of a Scottish castle, cuz that's a thing. If you've seen Party of Five, you know Lacy Chabert and Scott Wolf have had parent issues before, but this didn't seem so much as a problem. They were just annoying about it. Lacy falls for the groundskeeper, dances with someone she should actually be dating (Will Kemp) and leaves the castle only to return and stay. The last 10 minutes of the movie happened so fast that you really need to look up from your phone to catch all the flip flopping. I'm giving this one seven stars for the acting (mostly the tour guide and bar keep) and the setting. I read that the castle they used was actually in Ireland - which is not cool Hallmark. Always dissing the Scots.
Magic in Mistletoe (2023)
Uneven and drawn out
Full disclosure, I was hoping for a comedy since this film stars Paul Campbell (Three Wisemen and a Baby). The dude also wrote Unexpected Christmas, a classic. Alas, it wasn't meant to be. Paul plays Harrington, an author who wrote a series of Christmas novels focused on his hometown of (you'll never guess) Mistletoe. He posts a scrooge-like message online and is on the verge of being cancelled until his publisher's PR rep shows up to save him; wow him; spend time with him; hand him pens; decorate in ways he hates; slow the story down; meet people who already know him; accompany him to sparsely attended events. OK, all of these things. This film is incredibly uneven. Harrington seemed to learn his lesson in minute 36 or so, when my movie-watching buddy turned to me and asked if the movie was already over. Sorry, there was 1.5 hours of bland mushiness, and mild life-lessons remaining.
Candy Cane Lane (2023)
Just the right amount of silly Christmas fun
This movie is nuts and I really enjoyed it. Eddie Murphy's a dad who wants to win his neighborhood decorating contest for the cash (which is a bit ironic because they're doing just fine despite recent job events). He makes a deal with a "fallen" elf (under a freeway) and suddenly the 12 days of Christmas sort of attack the family and street. There are so many funny, clever moments in this movie that I'm certainly going to watch again. There's a fine line between silly and stupid. Eddie Murphy has definitely found himself in the stupid category before (Dr. Doolittle, The Nutty Professor). Candy Cane Lane is silly and delightful, without being stupid. The casting for this movie was really great Tracee Ellis Ross is just right and the kids and news anchors were perfect. Finally Jillian Bell, our misguided elf, is just the right amount of weird.
A Biltmore Christmas (2023)
Hallmark Christmas time travel at its best
I'm a sucker for a time travel movie, so when you add the Biltmore Estate in North Carolina at Christmas and Bethany Joy Lenz, plus Kristoffer Polaha, you've got my expectations rather high. It's safe to say my expectations were met and bested. This movie was excellent. Our protagonist is Lucy, she's a writer working on a reimagining of a film from 1947. She visits the site of the filming, the afore mentioned Biltmore Estate. Through some movie magic, Lucy travels back in time the set of the movie, during filming. Why exactly? No idea. Nobody explains that, but it's OK. Lucy gets mixed up in the inner workings of the production in the past and, no surprise falls in love with a never-been-better Polaha. How will this work out? I'm not ashamed to say that I did not see the ending coming. Which I love! Surprises are great. This movie is written and casted very well. It's funny and sweet. Extra credit for showing clips of the 1947 movie as an excellent plot device. Love it. Love it. Love it. Hallmark at its best.
A Not So Royal Christmas (2023)
A familiar Christmas genre for Hallmark
This is a familiar genre for Hallmark. There's a historical kingdom or castle who really does it up big for Christmas, but things are not exactly on the up-and-up. In this go around a journalist shows up trying to get an interview with a Count. Honestly, I can't even remember the name of the place, not that it's critical to the story. Brooke D'Orsay (who I'll always remember from Royal Pains) plays our journalist, who isn't entirely honest about why she's there. She's great as usual. The royals scheme too by trotting out Will Kemp, who might be the best looking groundskeeper in all the land, to play the never-been-seen Count. This movie works, but it doesn't break any new ground. The ending is rather cringy, but not a giant surprise.
Letters to Santa (2023)
Stealing mail is a crime and so was this movie
Hallmark, you lied. You told us that the kids in this movie get a magical pen that grants wishes. Sounds like a good time, right? Like what crazy things might the kids get with this magical pen? Well, it's not magic. It's grandma who also steals the mail, which I'm pretty sure is a crime just about anywhere. The female lead in this film is entirely too angry one minute then over-the-top happy the next. Editing? Acting? I'm not sure. There is also a rather racy scene, or tease of something racy that I would not have expected in a Hallmark movie, but kudos for trying. I'm here for showcasing some real couple situations like separation, but they dangle other love interests in front of these leads, who may have been better matches for them, which is too confusing. Think of the children! But really, this is a stinker.
The Naughty Nine (2023)
A naughty heist film for the whole family
What would happen if the guys from Oceans Eleven were actually 11 years old, and on the naughty list? It might result in something like this Disney+ offering, which was certainly watchable for me and my first grader. Kids who don't get gifts from Santa decide to bust into Santa's village in the North Pole and get the gifts they didn't receive. Forget that they didn't get them because they are on the Naughty List. Kudos to the schools being named McAllister (Home Alone) and Griswold (Christmas Vacation). Side note of reality - if these tikes are so darn clever, it seems as though there may be less difficult ways to get the gifts they are missing. The gifts are the Macguffin of the film, which in the end isn't the most critical thing. The tease a sequel near the end - looking forward to it.