Shovelmonkey1's Reviews > Robinson Crusoe

August 1651
Dear Diary,
Woo hoo! Run away to sea at last! Mum and Dad didn't want me to go but honestly, what's the worst that can happen? So far I'm loving life on the ocean wave and have only been a little bit sea sick. Anyway it's Bye bye Hull, hello Honolulu!
Yours, Robinson

January 1653
Dear Diary,
Sorry it's been so long. There was a minor incident with a shipwreck and just when I'd managed to find passage on another boat some pirates turned up and I ended up as a slave. I had to do loads of work for this Moorish guy and while it was all nice and exotic, it's not nice being stripped of all your civil liberties. Anyway I've just escaped with my buddy Xury and we're heading out to sea in order to see if we can flag down a bigger boat, er sorry, ship.
Yours, Robinson

March 1654
Dear Diary,
Just arrived in Brazil - wowee it is hot here. Much hotter than hull at any rate. I'm redder than a snapper on stick and am having a bit of trouble finding my feet. There's some sort of carnival on and I've seen a big hill which would like nice with a big statue of Jesus on it. I've met some nice blokes on the boat and they said they'd help me make my fortune. Someone is predicting that Brazil nuts will be the next big thing come Christmas next year so maybe I'll give that a go.
Yours, Robinson

June 1660
Dear Diary,
Well it's been a while and a lot has happened. I got myself all set up with a nice plantation and enjoyed the good life for a while here but I miss the salty tang of the sea air, the creak of the sails and the gentle rocking of the boat so I've decided to sink my money into slavery and am going to put to sea as soon as I can. I've realised I'm not one for a landlubbers life.
Yours, Robinson

November 1661
Dear Diary,
Well I am literally scuppered. My slaving venture didn't go too well. Guess I should have thought about my own time as a slave with that Moorish guy before I set out in order to profit from other peoples misery but hey, everyone else is doing it and even Bristol are getting in on the trade now by all accounts. Anyway that's all by the by now. We headed for Africa but a devil of storm came and dragged the ship and all the men on down to Davy Jones. I think I'm the only survivor and the sea has spit me up on this miserable sliver of land with only the clothes on my back. A couple of animals survived too. I've called the dog Defoe and the cats are called Swift and Behn. For now I just pet them but if I can't find any food then Defoe is going to make a tidy stir fry. Am off to set up camp now so will write upon my return.
Yours, Robinson

January 1662
Dear Diary,
I've settled in and created a quite minimalist base camp. It's taken a lot of ingenuity to make all the things I need. Wreckage from the ship and flotsam and jetsam have washed ashore and provided me with some raw materials like sails and timber, bits of rope and metal. It's not exactly the Radisson Blue but I'm quite proud of my little house. The cats and rats are multiplying quite ridiculously - I shudder to think what it's doing to the ecosystem. I kill and eat the goats and birds but they're getting wise to my tricks now. I've kept one of the birds as a pet and called him bird brian. I'm having to go further and further afield for food... the other month I fell into a ravine and broke a limb... I thought for certain I was a goner but the lord has been kind to me since I arrived here. I'm not normally one for solitude but the peace and quiet has been educational. I suppose I've become a bit introspective but I don't have much time to mope as staying alive takes up most of my days.
Yours, Robinson

August 1665
Dear Diary,
Visitors! Wish I'd baked something! Turns out they're cannibals though so I guess nice scones and a cup of honest to goodness tea bark probably is not their thing. Was tempted to smite them for being heathenish devils but I'm looking pretty heathenish myself these days and beggars can't be choosers over company at a time like this. One of them chose to stay behind. Can't understand a bloody thing about him and he's not one for chatter. I've called him Friday and he's put up no objections so far. Am looking forward to spending some time with my new friend
Yours, Robinson

March 1672
Dear Diary,
Seven years since I last wrote - well you could have knocked me over with a parrots feather when I realised! Friday and I have become firm friends. Still not a lot of chatter but then a man is glad of companionship without all the additional twittering. He's got a bit of a grip on my lingo now though and has shown an interest in the ways of our Lord. I told him about my big statue idea. He laughed.
Yours, Robinson

April 1685
Dear Diary,
Recently some other cannibals came to the island. They were planning to hot-pot someone but we soon put pay that idea. There was a bit of a to-do and now we have two newly saved captives on our hands. The island is starting to feel quite crowded. One of them is a Spaniard who says his country men are near by and could save us, the other bloke was none other than my man Friday's father. The two of them are off back to the mainland to rustle up a rescue party. I keep thinking about bacon butties.
Yours, Robinson

December 1686
Dear Diary,
Today was my last day on the island. Felt a bit sad to say bye bye. I've grown fond of all its nooks and crannies now, and though admittedly, I would give my eye teeth for a bacon sandwich and a nice cup of tea I suspect that never again shall I experience the resplendent solitude which I experienced on the island. Don't know if I'll ever get used to sleeping in a bed and not a hammock either. I'm thinking of writing about my experiences though. Wonder if this is the sort of thing that people would like to know about? Friday has agreed to come with me which is nice but I'm not sure what he'll think of Hull, after all it's no paradise island.
Yours, Robinson