Dorene Duncan's Reviews > The Many Lives of Mama Love: A Memoir of Lying, Stealing, Writing, and Healing

I rarely write thorough reviews but felt it necessary to explain this low rating. 1 star ratings are also rare for me. This book should be used in school to teach white privilege & lack of self awareness.

I should preface that my son is a recovering addict who also works in the recovery world. He is a white male & his story is far different than many others. It is not lost on him or myself that his privilege makes his story different. I myself went thru the 12 steps in order to support my son in his recovery & ensure I was accountable in my own journey as his mother, the loved one of an addict. I say that to share I know a fair amount about addiction & have read many books of addicts journeys etc. I like to dual read & listen to memoirs when they are narrated as hearing the authors voice typically adds depth. I thought this book was sad & was disappointed it has gotten the public recognition it has recently. There are so many stories that are so much more deserving related to addiction & recovery. This is a story of someone who appears to have no idea how truly lucky she is & how her story could have been so different. I have sat in many AA & Alanon meetings and heard the true beauty of recovery. That starts with real humility, accountability & not victim playing. I am not here to judge only to say in my opinion Laras memoir didn’t express the real regret & accountability most people who have truly recovered experience & express.

I’m aware my opinion on this book is probably not the popular one but I would be interested to see how unpopular it is with those who really know & understand addiction & recovery?!

I rarely read Oprah Book Club picks & actually didn’t realize it was one as this was a random pick prior for my book club. I’m not shocked it is though & it mirrors why I don’t find Oprahs picks to my liking. My son often hits struggles with his addiction & the aftermath of his actions from when he was an active addict. He keeps pushing and takes responsibility for they were his choices at the time struggling thru an active disease. Sometimes it isn’t fair but at the end of the day things happened due to his actions. The beauty of recovery is realizing you are responsible & owning your part in life. Lara gets a dream job and decides to not disclose prison time even though she states she is practicing rigorous honesty. When the employer later finds out thru google she withheld the truth her initial & basically only accountability is a victim mentality & comment “f@$&ing google”. No Lara your actions & crimes sucked & your lack of real accountability & the beauty of true humility is sad. Being sober & clean takes incredible discipline, strength & perseverance. Good for you for no longer using, but being sober is about a lot more than just not using substances it’s about owning your journey, good & bad.

I hope if you read this book you also read other memoirs on addiction & recovery. I would hate for your only journey with an addict to be painted with this brush.