I really enjoyed this (especially the gorgeous artwork), but my major sticking point is that Laura Dean just... isn't interesting, or charismatic, andI really enjoyed this (especially the gorgeous artwork), but my major sticking point is that Laura Dean just... isn't interesting, or charismatic, and I don't really understand why Freddy keeps going back to her. I get that it was probably just the high of first love, but still, I found Laura to be boring and flat....more
...it feels good to love a thing and not expect anything back. It feels good to not get an argument or any pushiness or any rumors or any bullshit. It...it feels good to love a thing and not expect anything back. It feels good to not get an argument or any pushiness or any rumors or any bullshit. It's love without strings. It's ideal. (p. 18)
The Poles, the Ukrainians, the Yugoslavians, and the Russians. The blacks, the Gypsies, anyone of mixed race, the mentally or physically disabled and the homosexuals. "At least the Nazis had that right," Kevin Herman says from the back row. The rest of the back row laughs. The film goes on. Mr. Williams either didn't hear Kevin or has become really good at ignoring him. (p. 25. Fun fact: During our eighth-grade field trip to Washington D.C. a kid in my class said that homosexuality should be illegal, and our tour guide -- a complete stranger -- agreed with him. We were on our way to the Holocaust Museum.)
Is it okay to lie in order to be happy? (p. 64. The answer is yes, by the way, but I don't look at it as lying, because queer people don't owe anyone anything. Our safety is more important than your curiosity.)
Justin hoots. "Dude! You're one of us!" I keep shaking my head, and I add a shrug, but I'd be lying if I told you that his excitement and invitation into one of them isn't making me cringe. Because I'm not in this to be a member of some club. I'm not going through this so I can lock myself in the one of them box." (p. 94)
Just how many things do I have to invent in my head to survive this? (p. 188)
As I walk down the halls, I see them shackled to the waxed tile floor, ankle cuffs digging into their skin. I see how many of them need to be in the cave. I see the ones who will never leave and the ones who have to return because they can't handle what's outside. Which is: nothing. Nothing is outside. Rumors don't matter. Unity Valley reputations don't matter. Whether I'm gay or not doesn't really matter. (p. 194)
When I look at her, I see our house as a mini cave, and her fire as a mini fire that casts mini shadows for us mini shackled prisoners. We are a cave within a cave within a cave. Our little house on Main street (with the immaculately pressed curtains) is part of the Unity Valley cave, which has its Unity Valley fire that casts Unity Valley shadows. And Unity Valley is just a cave inside the big American cave that is a huge fire that casts the biggest shadows of all. (p. 212)
...equality isn't really obvious to most people. And I don't mean to say the world is filled with racists or sexists or homophobes. I mean to say: Everybody's always looking for the person they're better than. (p. 231)
You mean to tell me that it's 2011 and this guy gets paid to have remedial talks with high school students about how they shouldn't hate other people? Isn't this elementary? Shouldn't it be automatic? What kind of species are we if we have to have people come talk to us about this crap? And how, if we're that stupid, did we get to the moon and help build a space station? (p. 247)
Camus-loving Clay gets the superintendent all wound up about the true meaning of education by saying that in recent years, our highly paid administrators are simply puppets for yahoo school boards who don't know anything about the tenets of a good education. "That's ridiculous!" the superintendent says. "What's ridiculous is the cutting of the art program in the elementary schools this year, sir. And the simultaneous building of a soccer field when we already have one soccer field." Score for Craig. (p. 270)
(view spoiler)[I look at the plane, and I send my love. Don't worry I'll keep it safe. Stay strong. (p. 294. Hot take: if you send your child to a conversion camp, you almost certainly don't love them, and I hope that when they're older and have power they put you in the worst nursing home they can find.) (hide spoiler)]...more
"When everything gets quiet, I can't understand that the world extends past me." (p. 47, "The End of Summer")"When everything gets quiet, I can't understand that the world extends past me." (p. 47, "The End of Summer")...more
**spoiler alert** I really enjoyed the first half. But the second half was... ehhhhhhh. Ultimately a disappointment. Spoilers below.
Pros: - Werewolf gir**spoiler alert** I really enjoyed the first half. But the second half was... ehhhhhhh. Ultimately a disappointment. Spoilers below.
Pros: - Werewolf girls who eat sexual predators (except for that one kid) - Sapphic romance - Doesn't shy away from gore
Cons: - Ends up being anti-"mean girl" wish fulfillment, feels petty and mean-spirited - For some reason the alpha of the pack is Ariana Grande, name (plus a letter) and traction-alopecia-inducing-ponytail included. - Unsubtle references to Brett Kavanaugh and Harvey Weinstein. C'mon. It's like naming the bullies in your story Tyler Bundy and Justin Dahmer. It's weird, it's forced, and it's not as clever as you think it is. - I don't trust works of fiction that make a big deal out of "smashing the patriarchy" in the blurbs, because they inevitably come across as insincere and performative. This absolutely felt that way. - It's interesting that the one black person in the group is ultimately the bad guy - The ending with Arianna (oh wait she's totally not Ariana Grande 'cause they added a letter) getting killed was weak and dumb. Again, screams anti-mean girl revenge fantasy. - We're constantly told that the main character is weird and doesn't fit in, that she's smart with a high vocabulary, that she's kind and generous... and we see pretty much none of that. The plot is so focused on werewolf stuff that none of the characters feel fleshed out in the slightest. Becca's personality is that she's self-conscious and in the closet. That's it. I don't know why we're expected to care about characters whose personalities can be summed up with two or three traits each. - I get that the whole "you join the popular clique and become a predator" thing is symbolic and whatever but it's unsubtle to the point where I thought it was supposed to be, like, a parody. But no.
It's fine, I guess. Read the first half and then imagine where the rest goes, because it will probably be more interesting than what we got.
2 stars because I like the premise and some of the narrative choices.
Twelve first impressions/responses to this wonderful book:
1. Being trans is beautiful, and joyful, and powerful
2. I'm not ashamed to be trans, I'm afrTwelve first impressions/responses to this wonderful book:
1. Being trans is beautiful, and joyful, and powerful
2. I'm not ashamed to be trans, I'm afraid of transphobes hurting me
3. TERFs are awful (and yes, this includes J.K. Rowling, who I'm totally done with at this point)
4. Kacen Callender can do no wrong
5. Support trans kids
6. If you're queer and transphobic you're part of the problem
7. My plans to start transitioning this spring were totally derailed and I'm filled with dread and this makes me feel selfish and ashamed because people are literally dying
8. I wish I'd stop biting my nails, 'cause I really want to paint them
9. I want to dye my hair
10. I wish I was brave enough to be an artist, but I'm afraid to be vulnerable
11. I feel a pang of guilt when I respond to Callender's work, because their work depicts the struggles of queer, trans, POC characters and I'm only two of those things, and while our pains are comparable they are not the same
12. I hope all of the queer kids who are currently quarantined with abusive/bigoted families are okay
I was gonna write a big, pretentious response to this, and I might still do that one day, but I'm emotionally exhausted and I don't have the energy anymore. But I will say this:
This is an amazing book by an amazing writer, and you should read it.
it's good but angsty to the point that it gets kind of annoying.
also, (view spoiler)[there's a certain conversation midway or so through the book thatit's good but angsty to the point that it gets kind of annoying.
also, (view spoiler)[there's a certain conversation midway or so through the book that made me lose a lot of my sympathy for aaron. like, dude, you still cheated and you won't even apologize for breaking your girlfriend's heart. it doesn't matter what your justification is. (hide spoiler)]...more