A sweet, short story about an ice-bear shifter who is non-binary, awaiting the arrival of the man whom ey is romantically involved with, but to whom eA sweet, short story about an ice-bear shifter who is non-binary, awaiting the arrival of the man whom ey is romantically involved with, but to whom ey has not confided some important parts of eir identity and family. Very short, but a fun look at a non-binary character of a different sort.
Merged review:
A sweet, short story about an ice-bear shifter who is non-binary, awaiting the arrival of the man whom ey is romantically involved with, but to whom ey has not confided some important parts of eir identity and family. Very short, but a fun look at a non-binary character of a different sort....more
This is a gorgeous story mainly from the POV of an autistic teen with some degree of synesthesia. Gregor lives with his older brother Alexei and his bThis is a gorgeous story mainly from the POV of an autistic teen with some degree of synesthesia. Gregor lives with his older brother Alexei and his brother's boyfriend Bruno, who provide a warm, accepting, nutruring foundation for Gregor to be himself. With that support, Gregor is with some difficulty navigating school and friendships. He has a hard time communicating because he's nonverbal and even in writing, words feel prickly and sharp and uncomfortable to him most of the time. So he uses photos, memes and drawings, symbols and single words on his phone to get his meaning across. He's also an artist, and in his art he creates the most complete access to the things he wants to convey.
Gregor has sometimes wished he was asexual and aromantic, because he imagines not having to deal with the depth of sexual and romantic feelings would be easier. (Although he has folks around him (like his brother/sibling who is nonbinary and asexual) to show him that every orientation has its complexity.) But he's been watching a boy named Noah at school. Noah sometimes works with the LGBTQIA group and while at first, Gregor doesn't know much about him or even know if he identifies as other than het, there's a connection between them that pulls them together.
Noah is dealing with his own issues. He's in foster care with two younger foster siblings for whom he feels responsible. The foster parents are disengaged and careless, and Noah's afraid that if something goes wrong, they will send him or a sibling away and break up the little family he's created. So he drives himself hard to keep his siblings safe, even at his own cost. Seeing Gregor, slowly getting to know him, is the sweet warmth of Noah's days in a world of stress, hypervigilance, and responsibility. Both boys are fortunate in their friends, having someone close enough that they can rely on for support. Not perfectly - these are also teens who make mistakes - but with confidence that they are cared for. This underlying support keeps the book from becoming dark, even when both boys are struggling with coping skills.
The romance is sweet. The boys feel a little older than they are to me - perhaps because this is a UK setting so the older boy, Noah, about to graduate high school, is sixteen, and the younger with one year left is fifteen. In the US in those situations they would be seventeen and eighteen. There is a little underage sex, which IMO is appropriate and realistic between two teens in that situation. At their ages, there is always the question of whether love will last, but the way they come to understand each other is deep and solid as a basis for a lifetime.
The beauty of the book is how well the author takes you inside Gregor's (and occasionally, Noah's) head and makes the reality of being neurodivergent or a traumatized teen in a difficult situation clear with a degree of inner consistency and logic and joys as well as struggles. Beautifully done....more
Alexis Hall is an auto-buy author for me, who writes in a range of voices, from the gorgeous intensity of Glitterland and For Real to the rom com of BAlexis Hall is an auto-buy author for me, who writes in a range of voices, from the gorgeous intensity of Glitterland and For Real to the rom com of Boyfriend Material; This one is humor bordering on farce, and historical bordering on fantasy.
Because it's Alexis Hall, there's some emotional resonance that leaks through between the chuckle-out-loud absurdity of the story. The characters have moments of connection and emotion beneath the froth and absurdities. And I hope he had great fun writing it. Don't look for real historical issues or context, or for much conflict. This is a lightweight romp, in an imagined historical setting that carries few real consequences. (It does at times serve to make us remember what the actual consequences would have been, were it a true historical. There are echoes of something deeper, but never more than echoes.)
I'm not generally a fan of farce at all, so this book which pulled me happily along through the story succeeds amazingly well on that level. At the same time, I look forward to someday getting another serious story from this author, whose ability to make his characters live on the page in all their complexity IMO shines best in those books. In the meantime, his older work remains a repeat reread. (I think I'm on the sixth time through For Real.) If this is your first Hall book, do check out the range of his stories - something there for readers with all kinds of tastes, and he always leaves me with a satisfied sigh at the end of the story....more
This is a gentle, warm story of the fictional island of Merryapple in the summer of 1780, as her residents are beset by a hurricane. Among those residThis is a gentle, warm story of the fictional island of Merryapple in the summer of 1780, as her residents are beset by a hurricane. Among those residents are Robin, a middle-aged heavyset, sweet gay fisherman whose father left behind a scandal that has shadowed his life. Duncan, maker of fascinating mechanical wooden toys, who was the love of Robin's life before changes between them pushed them apart. And Edwin, local baker trying to go it alone in his business after the loss of his brother, who has had a crush on Robin for years.
These men are all ordinary people in many ways, not handsome, not athletic, not brilliant, just people with strengths and weaknesses. The folk around them are an interesting array of characters, from the lesbian couple with money, to the reluctant innkeeper, to the fishmonger too prissy to get close to his wares, to the small girl with an entrepreneurial spirit. On this fictional island, the idea that marriage or love should be only heterosexual has been soundly rejected, so there is no echo of homophobia and no axe of prison time hanging over these folk, as there would be in a typical historical.
That absence lets this unfold as a quiet tale of a weather disaster opening up old secrets and old wounds, getting people who have known each other a long time to see each other in a different light, regardless of the gender of the person they have wanted or loved. There is a happy ending, but this is not a romance. Its focus is broad across the characters, and even though Robin is the heart of the story, it is about him finding himself, understanding his past, and building his future, of which romantic love is only a modest part.
If you enjoy quiet, quirky, character-driven fiction (like, say, Elizabeth Goudge's het fiction like A City of Bells) then this story brings some of the same reading pleasure....more
This is an interesting novella set in the Lilywhite Boys series, with two engaging main characters. Both Stan, with his shy diffidence, and ChristianaThis is an interesting novella set in the Lilywhite Boys series, with two engaging main characters. Both Stan, with his shy diffidence, and Christiana in all her complexity and vulnerable determination, caught my attention right away. Their romance is sweet and tentative, a case of somehow against all odds finding your match. The Lilywhite Boys are here in their roughest incarnation, justice and crime in one double package. The historical context is limited but realistic. And yay for a book with trans and ace characters in it....more
This is the story of two teens and a relationship, shown in snippets year by year, as they grow from 13 to 18, from scared and uncertain to confident.This is the story of two teens and a relationship, shown in snippets year by year, as they grow from 13 to 18, from scared and uncertain to confident.
Morgan is a trans girl, but that's not easy for her to either accept about herself, or present to the world. At 13, she tries to tell her best friend Eric, on their mutual birthday, in a rush of self-understanding and hope. But circumstances mean he doesn't hear her brave declaration, and finding the moment and the courage to get past that brink again is going to take years, and pain, and changes for them both.
Although the structure of one brief period a year means that a few important moments didn't make it onto the page, I was impressed with how well this book helped me see and imagine Morgan's life through the years, as she tried to live with, or suppress, or change, or accept, her identity. And Eric's confusion knowing something was going on with his best friend, and between them, but not having the key to decipher exactly what.
Both these teens felt believable, the lack of communication realistic, and Morgan's steps forward and back, amid the pressures in her life, were achingly real. The ending is perhaps a bit sunny, but I was glad to find a warm, sweet resting place at the end of the story for both main characters. ...more
This story introduces us to 4 points of view. Di is a young woman who survived a severe accident, but lost her mobility, her fiance, her profession anThis story introduces us to 4 points of view. Di is a young woman who survived a severe accident, but lost her mobility, her fiance, her profession and her beloved eventing horse. In the isolation of her small cottage, her cat is her companion as she tries to rebuild. Hugh is a gay Dom who hides his heart away and tries to give his subs precisely what they need, without ever being vulnerable himself. Raphael is elegant, musical, both kind and exacting, bisexual and a sub. And Lucie... well Lucie is feminine for Lucifer and she's a kinky masochistic sub to Hugh, who works to indulge her, but she's far far more to Raphael, and eventually to herself as well.
This story builds slowly— over time we see the dark places inside these characters but also the light ones. We see love, expressed and hidden, and bad and good choices, as Lucie, in particular, struggles with what it means to be a real girl. I was pulled in gradually, fascinated and engaged with how these people would work out a relationship that could satisfy all the different parts of them without breaking anyone. The reactions of the characters felt realistic, although one particular loss (view spoiler)[- the blue cello - (hide spoiler)] didn't get acknowledged as much as I expected. I ached a bit for all of them, and the warm resolution was satisfying. The title is apt for a story with characters and scenes that run the spectrum from sweet vanilla to dark kink, and which encompasses a complexity of human desires and hearts. Recommended....more
Jordan is the epitome of a sweet nerd, a guy whose mouth loses all brakes when he gets nervous, and whose rambling is as endearing as it is wildly-offJordan is the epitome of a sweet nerd, a guy whose mouth loses all brakes when he gets nervous, and whose rambling is as endearing as it is wildly-off-topic. Hennessy has finally shed an ex who couldn't live with an asexual boyfriend, and is ready to rebuild with someone better. Watching these guys figure out that they belong together is warm and fun.
This book kept me smiling, and sometimes chuckling, all the way through. Two asexual guys at different points on their journey meet up, first anonymously on the bus, then at a support meeting for Ace folk. That situation allows the book to incorporate a lot of great info about being asexual, and it only occasionally becomes a bit of a sidetrack from the story of the main characters.
There's a minimum of angst, and a host of supportive and quirky side characters. A fun read, and a good story to suggest to someone who has no concept of what asexuality in a relationship might look like, as long as they have an appreciation for a kind of rom-com atmosphere. It's always great to see more asexual MCs in our books. (And other than many f-bombs, this would be just fine for YA readers, although the MCs are adults.)...more
4.5 stars. This YA book gives us Ben, a closeted non-binary teen with cold, demanding parents. Ben knew their parents, especially their father, expect4.5 stars. This YA book gives us Ben, a closeted non-binary teen with cold, demanding parents. Ben knew their parents, especially their father, expect their offspring to live up to their narrow standards. But Ben still couldn't imagine that coming out to them about their true gender identity - and they/them pronouns - would lead to being thrown out on the street. Ben can't change who they are, so going home isn't an option. Luckily before they have to cope with homelessness, they get in touch with an older sister, also estranged from their parents for a decade, who takes them in.
Ben is deeply shaken by the rejection, depressed and stressed by having to start over with a new home, new school, and the only family they have being someone they hadn't seen in ten years. So they retreat into the closet, presenting as male at school, using he/him pronouns with everyone but their sister. Their only real friend is Mariam, a non-binary online vlogger and activist whose support has been and is a lifeline for them. But messaging and electronic contact isn't enough to fill a void of loneliness and loss and confusion in Ben.
School turns out to not be as bad as they feared, mostly because of Nathan, the boy assigned to be their mentor on the first day. Nathan is relentlessly cheerful, dorky, pushy, and keeps moving into Ben's personal space but in such a friendly way that it's hard for Ben to reject him. Nathan is exhausting, and sometimes scary as he grabs Ben's phone for selfies, with all the secrets buried in there. But he brings his own two best friends into Ben's circle, and keeps school from being an isolating, friendless desert for Ben. Nathan is also kind, and open minded, and accepting, and even if Ben isn't ready to tell Nathan about who they really are, they feel like they might one day. Nathan is hope, in a time when Ben desperately needs that.
Ben's sister also tries hard to give them what they need. This includes counseling, and I was glad to see a book about a teen going through hard times where this is realistically approached. Ben's mental health issues are believable, and empathically portrayed. Their experiences aren't diminished, or suddenly solved by true love.
There aren't many books with enby (NonBinary) main characters in any genre, but particularly in YA, I welcome a story that feels realistic. Ben's ability to cope with their life goes up and down, with progress and set-backs, but their dry sense of humor keeps the story from feeling too bleak. The reactions of those around them are plausible (sadly including their parents) and overall the believability of this book (other than Nathan being a bit too good to be true) is one of its best features. I didn't quite connect deeply and emotionally enough with the characters to give it the full 5 stars, but that's a very personal writing style thing, and others may feel totally pulled into Ben's head. The ending is warm, and hopeful. This one is well worth the read.
Content warnings for transphobia and misgendering, homophobia, emotional abuse, depression....more
Marek is a hockey player on his way out. He's had a chip on his shoulder, a motormouth, and a drive of anger since his father was killed when he was 1Marek is a hockey player on his way out. He's had a chip on his shoulder, a motormouth, and a drive of anger since his father was killed when he was 12, and his mother married a preacher. In some ways, that made Marek stand out in hockey as a grinder and a fighter, who could spark a team. His skills took him to the NHL, until a questionable late hit on a player left the man disabled. That was a black mark Marek could never get past, either in the league, with the fans, or in his own head. Now down from the NHL, past the AHL, to the ECHL, Marek figures he has another couple of years to play as a new minor team's bad boy, before his career is over.
The team gives him a rent-free apartment that turns out to be a closet-sized poorly-heated space across the hall from a yoga instructor's studio/apartment. The instructor, Shey, is easy on the eyes, but he drinks tea, believes in non-violence, and meditates. Marek figures the best his neighbor will be is eye candy, which Marek appreciates in either male or female form. Except Shey also has a cat, and Marek still misses his own cat, lost to an ex along the way. And Shey, who is pansexual, is less offended by Marek's attitudes than might be expected. Their small space, a mutual attraction, and an attitude change beginning to take place as Marek faces the end of one way of life with an uncertain future ahead, bring these two men together.
I enjoyed Marek's mouth-engaged-before-brain attitude. The two guys were good together, and I believed the way they came to enjoy each other's company out of bed. I wasn't sure quite what Shey was doing running his yoga studio out of his apartment - it seemed more than necessarily down-market for his situation - but it led to some amusing moments. Homophobia informs Marek's past, but wasn't the driving feature of this story, which was refreshing, and I liked that Marek's self-understanding had some hiccoughs along the way. Marek didn't engage my emotions to the degree that Locey's other characters sometimes have, but I really enjoyed watching his journey toward a better future with Shey.
This story reads just fine as a stand-alone....more
I really enjoyed this story of a gay journalist from humble origins, and a bisexual, polyamorous nobleman, working to fit a growing loving relationshiI really enjoyed this story of a gay journalist from humble origins, and a bisexual, polyamorous nobleman, working to fit a growing loving relationship into the minimal overlap of their lives in turn-of-the-century London.
The Honourable Aubrey Fanshawe has been in love with his best friend Rupert, Lord Hernedale, since they were boys at Eton. Rupert's wife and childhood friend Henrietta loves both of them, and although marrying Rupert was her logical choice to protect all their futures, the couple have as much as possible made a place for Aubrey in their life and when safe, their bed. Where they all enjoy each other, with Rupert at times watching, at times joining in.
Still, Aubrey is the one who has to get up out of that bed, leave the two people he loves, and go home in the dark and cold. Sometimes, despite the sweetness of their relationship, he is desperately lonely. And sometimes he has sex with other men, because he can't just march over there and demand room in that big bed.
Lucien is the son of a valet, and spent his childhood as servant-companion to a chronically ill nobleman. He could have done that forever, but service grated on him, and he left, first for the military and now to make his living as a journalist. He has an old friend whom he sometimes meets for quick sex, and he dallies with strangers in the parks that are known cruising grounds, but something in him yearns for a relationship that lasts longer than it takes to come, and that goes deeper than being pals with a happily married man who sometimes likes a tumble on the gay side.
Lucien has never wanted a relationship with an aristocrat, though. His parents' lives were spent at the whim of nobility, and his time in service to William, where a mask of friendship covers obligation, makes him leery of the upper class. He accepts and resents William's continued gifts and casual charities, as they smooth his life but make him itch. The last thing he wants is a man of money keeping him as a lover. But a night at a play brings him and Aubrey together, and that sweet, diffident, careful young man works his way under Lucien's guard. And nothing in his life will be simple again.
I really appreciated the historical grounding of this story, from the clothes and social mores, to the details of the women's suffrage movement and the strains of class differences. I also loved having strong female characters, an ace-spectrum character, and a polyamory where a new lover isn't a reason to devalue the old. The progression of the relationships felt realistic, and the obstacles valid. The ending wraps up a bit easily, with a couple of big obstacles swept away, but it was warm and sweet and didn't impose limits on love. I'm really looking forward to the next in the series. ...more
This book packs a whole lot of issues into one character-driven story. John is a big guy, rough-hewn and unattractive in appearance but gentle by natuThis book packs a whole lot of issues into one character-driven story. John is a big guy, rough-hewn and unattractive in appearance but gentle by nature, whose last relationship was beyond bad. He's tied up in knots, unable to trust himself and even prone to panic attacks after his previous boyfriend put him through a psychological wringer.
John meets Chris at a cafe, accidentally spilling his tea, and it's attraction at first sight - or in the case of Chris, who is blind, at first hear. In the absence of a snap judgement based on what John looks like, Chris's first impression is warm and kind, and desirable, “like the hot afterburn of whiskey.” They begin a tentative relationship, hampered by Chris's prickles and limits and by John's worries and inability to take anything lightly.
I adored John, and he gave us a look at a current hot button from the other side, in a way that felt valid. His family was great too. Chris had his reasons for his reflexes and worries, and for holding John at a little distance when John was already falling head over heels in love.
Sometimes, John seemed like the one making all the accommodations, but Chris was climbing some real obstacles and the fact that he worked hard to discount them as much as possible didn't make them less real. By the end of the book, it felt like Chris had one too many things piled onto him (including the last family reveal) and I wouldn't have minded John pushing Chris to get therapy too. The ease of the physical side of their relationship is plausible because of who John is, as his deep pleasure is in pleasing his partners, but once or twice I looked for hesitation that wasn't there. In general, I was pulled along through this story cheering these guys on to finding the balance between all of their issues, needs, desires, and painful spots.
I love this author's writing style, his use of language, the conversations between his characters. Always a pleasure to read. ...more
This was light and nerdy and fun, and yet real. A group of four 16- and 17-year-old boys reach that moment when friends and hanging out and goofing ofThis was light and nerdy and fun, and yet real. A group of four 16- and 17-year-old boys reach that moment when friends and hanging out and goofing off can't be enough, and they start seriously looking at dating and sex. Jordan is gay and out among his friend group, and they have his back. But still, finding a guy to date is different from finding a girl, and Jordan doesn't have a real clue how to go about it. He's also skipped all the early parts that het guys can have with open crushes and teasing girls and talking about girls and kind of easing into things. Jordan is diving off into the deep end.
He suggests going to a gay dance club, where he can expect most of the guys to be interested in gay relationships without having to worry about approaching a homophobic straight guy, and he promises his friends straight girl sidekicks they can meet there. It's a real-life adventure, for a guy who previously defined adventures by trash mobs of monsters on random pats (patrols) as he and his friends hunted for the main boss in a game. Real life turns out to be messier, more painful, more thrilling, and harder to figure out.
There is fun banter between the characters, and having Jordan break the fourth wall to talk to the reader (something that I usually don't like) worked well here, with his naive voice, his good nature, the nerd quotient, and the thread of coming of age pains and growth that never became angst.
Don't forget to read past the author notes to the after-credits scene too. A fun, warm story with real teen boys, and a sweet ending....more
3.5 rounded up. We see a lot of books with a gay teen afraid to come out to his parents. Here in a twist we have parents who are not only accepting bu3.5 rounded up. We see a lot of books with a gay teen afraid to come out to his parents. Here in a twist we have parents who are not only accepting but enthusiastic, and in the case of Geordi's father, with a poor sense of personal boundaries. They throw him a rainbow coming out party before he's really come out to more than one best friend. In so doing, they mess up Geordi's relationship with his best friend Toff, and send Geordi tumbling into confusion about who he's attracted to, and how to handle being out.
Toff is in the opposite position, with a father who has been completely emotionally absent since his mother died years ago. Toff's dad provides for him physically, but never manages to connect with him emotionally, and doesn't react to anything he does, good or bad. Geordi's parents are more present in Toff's life than his own dad.
There isn't much sex as plot in the book, but it realistically assumes two 15-year-olds are going to be thinking about it a lot, and maybe taking a first step or two. I'm giving this book a round-up star for including a scene where a parent discusses with their kid how to put on a condom correctly. It's sad commentary about the state of sex ed in the US that I applaud works of teen fiction that have information that might save lives, in a context of fiction teens might enjoy.
I did feel like the light, breezy tone of the narration skated over the surface of some serious issues here. The risks and emotional impact on a kid of being outed involuntarily by their parents was allowed to slide by, for the most part. And the fact that the plot also revolves around parental emotional neglect and family loss made the easy resolution ring a bit hollow. There was room for more depth and emotion as the second half of the book took a serious turn. I loved the representation (gay, bi, questioning, and lesbian characters) and the level of acceptance among the families, but wished for a bit more acknowledgement of the impact some events should have had on the characters.
(view spoiler)[ I wanted to smack Geordi's father several times, not least when he categorized his own youthful relationship with a boy as "lots of teens have same-sex feelings, and for many of them, those feelings go away and never resurface" - a facile dismissal of his own bisexuality. But since the book made a point of having bi characters, I'm giving the author a pass on his character's obliviousness. I also wished that Toff's mental health in the face of all he dealt with had been given serious address. (hide spoiler)]
This wasn't my favorite book by this author, but I'm always in favor of a story with an LGBTQ POC teen with accepting parents.
This story is one I was waiting for, completing the three-part picture of trans pregnancies begun in "Married Ones" and completed in "Erik the Pink". This story is one I was waiting for, completing the three-part picture of trans pregnancies begun in "Married Ones" and completed in "Erik the Pink". Here we have David, a gay trans veterinarian who becomes pregnant after sex with his loving partner although, unlike in the other two stories, David did not take this step on purpose. He always vaguely wanted children, and they've begun discussing adoption, but he isn't at a point in his life where a pregnancy was anything at first but an unwanted surprise.
And yet... they'd already been hoping to fit children into their life. Both of them love kids. Ryan, David's partner, may be in a wheelchair, but he's a strong capable guy and would be a great father. (David has some chronic health issues, one of which complicates the story. The characters made a debatable choice with risking this, but it's handled believably.) Barring complications, there's no actual obstacle to having this baby, and gifting them with a biological child that is both of theirs.
No obstacle, except the impact pregnancy will have on David's body, mind, job, emotions, and heart.
This is a powerful book about a loving relationship and two very real, strong, complicated guys who are on the same side. The conflicts are not between the MCs, but against the stress this wanted/unwanted pregnancy will put on David, on the ways they interact, and on the extended family of both accepting and horrible characters. David's challenge is front and center, as he is almost ripped apart by conflicting imperatives - to create a beloved, wanted child, and yet to keep his psyche from being unbearably damaged by the way pregnancy impacts his body and identity both day to day, and in the eyes of the world.
Metzger always writes characters who feel real, believable, important to me and emotionally engaging. I picked this book up (as I do all of his now) without reading the blurb, and was immediately pulled into the lives of two men dealing with the challenge of something that brings pain and joy in almost equal measures. In fact, the balance swings back and forth, as hope for the child wars with David's perception that the man he is, is being erased by the pregnancy. This story gave me a very real feel for how even small things can cut deep, how perceptions change minute to minute, and how love and support for each other is what keeps us all together in this difficult world. Highly recommended reading. I'd recommend them in pregnancy order, rather than release order - Married Ones, Bump, Erik the Pink....more
This is another great story about real people who are LGBTQ - Jamie is non-binary (enby) and uses they-them pronouns. Ashraf is asexual, and always fiThis is another great story about real people who are LGBTQ - Jamie is non-binary (enby) and uses they-them pronouns. Ashraf is asexual, and always figured he was aromantic too, until Jamie kissed him and he fell, deep and hard. But can cuddling and kisses be enough for Jamie, who isn't ace? And can an older Muslim university lecturer (view spoiler)[who is also trans but has no desire at all to be out (hide spoiler)] who loves a young Scots female-presenting PhD student navigate the disapproval engendered by their relationship? Most difficult, can a man with PTSD about the ocean and any big body of water have a happy future with an oceanography student whose passion is the sea?
This is a book of low drama, but a lot of poignancy. It shows the nagging effects of unconscious bigotry, and the power that love has to make us want to be our best selves. It shows how family is complicated, and I liked that Jamie's family supports them, without having to understand every nuance. This has a believable ace/non-ace romance that I fully believed will last. Ashraf's approach to his PTSD isn't a case of love curing all, but dogged determination.
A quiet, realistic, lovely book about two people finding their way forward that speaks simply but eloquently about prejudice and preconceptions on several fronts. I will read anything this author writes....more
Matthew Metzger always creates characters I care about, who feel plausible and real. This story, about a significantly overweight teen boy whose life Matthew Metzger always creates characters I care about, who feel plausible and real. This story, about a significantly overweight teen boy whose life is changed when his mom's fiancee sends him to learn Muay Thai boxing, is no exception. Max has been seriously bullied, verbally and physically, by the boys at his school. His "Aunt Donna" hopes that learning some self defense may change both his attitude and his risk, but it's meeting Cian - a mouthy, confident, trans guy - that really changes things for Max.
I loved Cian, who is unapologetic, unwilling to ever back down, and whose ability to see the person inside Max's hesitant and drastically out of shape persona isn't hampered by preconceptions. At times Cian pushes everyone, including himself, too hard, but he has courage and integrity and a sense of humor.
Max's issues with his weight, his long-deceased father and recently lost grandfather, are poignant. There's a clear dichotomy among reviewers in how they feel about Max's self-loathing and depression and how his weight plays into that, (including among reviewers who are themselves overweight.) Some find it real and poignant and plausible. Others feel like the obsession Max has with his size and how it impacts all the other parts of his life amounts to fat-shaming.
This issue is not personal to me, but I believed in Max, and his reactions and concerns felt valid. It didn't feel generalized beyond what is a realistic situation for a very overweight kid facing the cauldron of social pressures and judgment that is high school. The book does not require him to become slim, in order to become happy, although working at the gym does help his physical health improve. For me, that was a believable progression. For some, Max's starting point may feel uncomfortable or stereotypical or presented too strongly, so be aware. I applaud having a book where weight issues play a role, acknowledging that I don't think there is ever going to be a way to write that and make everybody happy with the portrayal.
I appreciated how Max's self-perceived orientation has to change from "straight" when he starts to be attracted to Cian, and how he deals with that. I also loved how Cian's ambivalence about his own body, its sources of pleasure, and its appeal to Max, played out. I really appreciate the way Metzger gives us trans characters at different points on their coming of age journey and lets the reader understand where they are coming from, even here through Max's POV. And I liked having a bisexual mom as just part of the secondary cast.
I did have a couple of issues with the plot of the book - most notably the idea that physically fighting back is the best way to deal with bullying, especially serious, physical bullying. There is no doubt that many, many teens have faced abuse that was ignored, condoned, or unable to be prevented by the adults who should have stepped in. But the message of fighting back and the idea that bullies are likely to be cowards is a risky one to endorse. Max's understanding of his own strengths was important but how that was deployed was a problem for me.
I also had a few quibbles with the supposedly-positive adults in the story, although perhaps it's good to have fallible adults in adding realism. (view spoiler)[My biggest issue was in the casual response at the gym to Cian's possible concussion, no matter how much Cian hates having a fuss made about him. That's not a situation for an ice pack and offhand remark. Any gym that ignored a traumatic head injury to that level IMO is not a safe place for teens. (hide spoiler)]
Over all, not my favorite Metzger, but one I was pulled into as usual, and enjoyed, and that had some moments of real poignancy, and real triumph. ...more
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