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338 pages, Paperback
First published July 12, 2022
For so long, I was not the guy people trusted. I needed to be that guy for her.”
“Hey.” I gently grasped her by the chin to turn her face to look at me. Staring into those haunted eyes, I wished like fuck I could take away every bad thing that had happened to this woman. But first I needed to know what those things were. “I’m sorry if you’ve met more than your fair share of shitty people…but do you know how much more of a miracle it is, then, that you are who you are, Ery?”
“And who do you think I am?” she whispered.
My chest suddenly felt too tight and my words came out hoarse. “You are good. From the tips of your toes to the ends of your curls…you’re nothing but good, through and through.”
“I trust you,” she said.
Joy filled me, a smile prodding my lips. I knew it was a huge deal to be given Eredine’s trust. She didn’t hand it over to many people, and I was honored she had done so to me. I only hoped I could be worthy of it. “Thank you. That means a lot. I trust you too.”
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted this?” he asked hoarsely. “Fantasized about having you in my arms like this? It’s fucking haunted me, Ery. And yet no fantasy could stand up to the reality of you. I need you.”
“No one can make promises going into a relationship, Ery. It’s a gamble everyone takes, not knowing if or when it will end. How much it’ll hurt. But it’s a risk worth taking when you feel this way.” He gave me a little shake with a tender smile. “Do you know how rare it is to have this connection? I’ve never felt anything like it.”
“Me neither,” I whispered.
Disappointment churned in my gut, and I did my best to keep that emotion off my face. How could I possibly agree to that when I wanted more? Fuck, I might as well as Ery to plunge a knife into my heart, right? Because there was no way I could come out of this unscathed.
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted this?” he asked hoarsely. “Fantasized about having you in my arms like this? It’s fucking haunted me, Ery. And yet no fantasy could stand up to the reality of you.”
I marvelled at how safe I felt with him. I was more vulnerable than a person could be, and yet with him, I felt not just protected but … free.
“I want more. I want a relationship with you, but you won’t give me that And I don’t want to hide what I feel from you, let alone anyone else. I have real feelings for you, Eredine. This isn’t just sex.” He ran a hand through his hair and let out a huff of sad laughter. “If I’m honest, it never was.”
“Maybe this new you is broken, but we’re all a little broken. I just need you to be you. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Hey.” I gently grasped her by the chin to turn her face to look at me. Staring into those haunted eyes, I wished like fuck I could take away every bad thing that had happened to this woman. But first I needed to know what those things were. “I’m sorry if you’ve met more than your fair share of shitty people…but do you know how much more of a miracle it is, then, that you are who you are, Ery?”
“And who do you think I am?” she whispered.
My chest suddenly felt too tight and my words came out hoarse. “You are good. From the tips of your toes to the ends of your curls…you’re nothing but good, through and through.”
“I trust you,” she said.
Joy filled me, a smile prodding my lips. I knew it was a huge deal to be given Eredine’s trust. She didn’t hand it over to many people, and I was honored she had done so to me. I only hoped I could be worthy of it. “Thank you. That means a lot. I trust you too.”
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted this?” he asked hoarsely. “Fantasized about having you in my arms like this? It’s fucking haunted me, Ery. And yet no fantasy could stand up to the reality of you. I need you.”
“No one can make promises going into a relationship, Ery. It’s a gamble everyone takes, not knowing if or when it will end. How much it’ll hurt. But it’s a risk worth taking when you feel this way.” He gave me a little shake with a tender smile. “Do you know how rare it is to have this connection? I’ve never felt anything like it.”
“Me neither,” I whispered.