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Black Boy Out of Time: A Memoir
An eloquent, restless, and enlightening memoir by one of the most thought-provoking journalists today about growing up Black and queer in America, reuniting with the past, and coming of age their own way.
One of nineteen children in a blended family, Hari Ziyad was raised by a Hindu Hare Kṛṣṇa mother and a Muslim father. Through reframing their own coming-of-age story, Ziyad takes readers on a powerful journey of growing up queer and Black in Cleveland, Ohio, and of navigating the equally complex path toward finding their true self in New York City. Exploring childhood, gender, race, and the trust that is built, broken, and repaired through generations, Ziyad investigates what it means to live beyond the limited narratives Black children are given and challenges the irreconcilable binaries that restrict them.
Heartwarming and heart-wrenching, radical and reflective, Hari Ziyad’s vital memoir is for the outcast, the unheard, the unborn, and the dead. It offers us a new way to think about survival and the necessary disruption of social norms. It looks back in tenderness as well as justified rage, forces us to address where we are now, and, born out of hope, illuminates the possibilities for the future.
One of nineteen children in a blended family, Hari Ziyad was raised by a Hindu Hare Kṛṣṇa mother and a Muslim father. Through reframing their own coming-of-age story, Ziyad takes readers on a powerful journey of growing up queer and Black in Cleveland, Ohio, and of navigating the equally complex path toward finding their true self in New York City. Exploring childhood, gender, race, and the trust that is built, broken, and repaired through generations, Ziyad investigates what it means to live beyond the limited narratives Black children are given and challenges the irreconcilable binaries that restrict them.
Heartwarming and heart-wrenching, radical and reflective, Hari Ziyad’s vital memoir is for the outcast, the unheard, the unborn, and the dead. It offers us a new way to think about survival and the necessary disruption of social norms. It looks back in tenderness as well as justified rage, forces us to address where we are now, and, born out of hope, illuminates the possibilities for the future.
313 pages, Paperback
First published March 1, 2021
About the author
Hari Ziyad
1 book92 followersHari Ziyad is a cultural critic, a screenwriter, the editor-in-chief of RaceBaitr, and the author of BLACK BOY OUT OF TIME. They are a 2021 Lambda Literary Fellow, and their writing has been featured in BuzzFeed, Out, the Guardian, Paste magazine, and the academic journal Critical Ethnic Studies, among other publications. Previously they were the managing editor of the Black Youth Project and a script consultant on the television series David Makes Man. Hari spends their all-too-rare free time trying to get their friends to give the latest generation of R & B starlets a chance and attempting to entertain their always very unbothered pit bull mix, Khione. For more information about the author, visit www.hariziyad.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 268 reviews
March 7, 2021
Let me start with the cover, it‘s simply beautiful. The colors, the butterflies, the flowers, the light, and of course, the Black person (Hari as a child becoming a grown-up?). I can watch it time and again. It’s powerful and tender at the same time; I could buy this book just because of the cover.
Then the book itself. I find it hard to review. The writing is beautiful but also repetitive (constantly mentioning ‘carceral dissonance’ drove me a little crazy) and too much of a long ramble. I had a hard time getting into the memoir. To be honest, I never really got in, and I found myself skipping pages the more I read. I just didn’t feel anything and I hated myself a little because of that. I liked the acknowledgments the most! A little weird, probably ... The memoir started with the Author’s note, not just one or a few pages but a whole (long) chapter. I got confused because of that. And when I began to think that the ARC wouldn’t have chapters but only text and text and text (because it didn’t really read as an Author’s note), the Author’s note was over, and the chapters started. I was already sighing at that time, and that’s not a good thing when you try to like a book.
I read All Boys aren’t Blue a month ago, and I loved that book. I expected Black Boy Out of Time somehow to be the same. But it wasn’t (and maybe I shouldn’t have had those expectations, that’s definitely on me).
I hope other readers will love this memoir more than I did. Because I believe these kinds of memoirs by own voices are important to us all. Besides, a book with such a glorious cover needs to be loved 😀! Two stars and adding one star because of the cover.
I received an ARC from Little A and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Then the book itself. I find it hard to review. The writing is beautiful but also repetitive (constantly mentioning ‘carceral dissonance’ drove me a little crazy) and too much of a long ramble. I had a hard time getting into the memoir. To be honest, I never really got in, and I found myself skipping pages the more I read. I just didn’t feel anything and I hated myself a little because of that. I liked the acknowledgments the most! A little weird, probably ... The memoir started with the Author’s note, not just one or a few pages but a whole (long) chapter. I got confused because of that. And when I began to think that the ARC wouldn’t have chapters but only text and text and text (because it didn’t really read as an Author’s note), the Author’s note was over, and the chapters started. I was already sighing at that time, and that’s not a good thing when you try to like a book.
I read All Boys aren’t Blue a month ago, and I loved that book. I expected Black Boy Out of Time somehow to be the same. But it wasn’t (and maybe I shouldn’t have had those expectations, that’s definitely on me).
I hope other readers will love this memoir more than I did. Because I believe these kinds of memoirs by own voices are important to us all. Besides, a book with such a glorious cover needs to be loved 😀! Two stars and adding one star because of the cover.
I received an ARC from Little A and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
November 17, 2020
I fell in love with this book after reading the first three paragraphs. The writing is simply beautiful and the story is completely compelling. Their work is consistently brilliant and this book is no different.
February 9, 2021
I tried desperately to connect with Hari Ziyad's "Black Boy Out of Time: A Memoir," an Amazon First Read that I consistently respected but could never quite fully embrace.
Ziyad grew up as one of nineteen children in a blended family raised by a Hindu Hare Kṛṣṇa mother and a Muslim father. Ziyad takes us through what is admittedly a powerful journey of growing up queer and Black in Cleveland, Ohio, and of navigating the equally complex path toward finding their true self in New York City. "Black Boy Out of Time" explores childhood, gender, race, and the trust that is built, broken, and repaired through generations investigating what it means to live beyond the limited narratives Black children are given and challenging the irreconcilable binaries that restrict them.
I have no doubt that many will connect with "Black Boy Out of Time," a book that simultaneously taps into both the intellectual and emotional aspects of Ziyad's life journey. Ziyad is honest, brutally honest at times, and yet there's also a deep understanding of socio-political truths and the ways in which they shape identity personal experience. Ziyad isn't really overly sentimental here, though at times "Black Boy Out of Time" is quite loving. Instead, Ziyad shapes even his own story by thinking about survival and disrupting what have become known as social norms.
There's a hopefulness here set amidst the resignation of acknowledging where we are now as a society and how that has shaped Ziyad's life and the lives of many others. There's immense rage and immense grief in the book, an acknowledgement of pain and limitation experienced.
Ziyad is the editor-in-chief of Racebaitr and is incapable of writing a memoir separated from the criminalization and persecution of race that has so often shaped Ziyad's experience. This persecution, along with what it means to survive sexual assault, permeates practically every page of "Black Boy Out of Time" and makes it both an immersive and challenging read definitely for the timid reader.
I was not bothered by the material in "Black Boy Out of Time." Indeed, I found Ziyad's brutal honesty refreshing and his uncompromising storytelling often quite engaging. Yet, throughout "Black Boy Out of Time" I struggled to surrender myself to Ziyad's often rhythmic writing and the vacillation between deeply personal and socio-political. At times, it felt as if a fence had been built between the memoir and the socio-political foundation upon which it was built. I struggled to climb this fence and that struggle kept me from fully engaging and more completely connecting with Ziyad and this powerful story.
Indeed, "Black Boy Out of Time" is a book I respected immensely yet it never captured me on the level that I'd hoped and like the best memoirs really do. For those who do connect with Ziyad's writing in such a way, "Black Boy Out of Time" has much to say and it says it with conviction and meaning. For others, myself included, "Black Boy Out of Time" is a book that will leave us grateful for Ziyad's desperately needed voice in a world that needs more diverse voices.
Ziyad grew up as one of nineteen children in a blended family raised by a Hindu Hare Kṛṣṇa mother and a Muslim father. Ziyad takes us through what is admittedly a powerful journey of growing up queer and Black in Cleveland, Ohio, and of navigating the equally complex path toward finding their true self in New York City. "Black Boy Out of Time" explores childhood, gender, race, and the trust that is built, broken, and repaired through generations investigating what it means to live beyond the limited narratives Black children are given and challenging the irreconcilable binaries that restrict them.
I have no doubt that many will connect with "Black Boy Out of Time," a book that simultaneously taps into both the intellectual and emotional aspects of Ziyad's life journey. Ziyad is honest, brutally honest at times, and yet there's also a deep understanding of socio-political truths and the ways in which they shape identity personal experience. Ziyad isn't really overly sentimental here, though at times "Black Boy Out of Time" is quite loving. Instead, Ziyad shapes even his own story by thinking about survival and disrupting what have become known as social norms.
There's a hopefulness here set amidst the resignation of acknowledging where we are now as a society and how that has shaped Ziyad's life and the lives of many others. There's immense rage and immense grief in the book, an acknowledgement of pain and limitation experienced.
Ziyad is the editor-in-chief of Racebaitr and is incapable of writing a memoir separated from the criminalization and persecution of race that has so often shaped Ziyad's experience. This persecution, along with what it means to survive sexual assault, permeates practically every page of "Black Boy Out of Time" and makes it both an immersive and challenging read definitely for the timid reader.
I was not bothered by the material in "Black Boy Out of Time." Indeed, I found Ziyad's brutal honesty refreshing and his uncompromising storytelling often quite engaging. Yet, throughout "Black Boy Out of Time" I struggled to surrender myself to Ziyad's often rhythmic writing and the vacillation between deeply personal and socio-political. At times, it felt as if a fence had been built between the memoir and the socio-political foundation upon which it was built. I struggled to climb this fence and that struggle kept me from fully engaging and more completely connecting with Ziyad and this powerful story.
Indeed, "Black Boy Out of Time" is a book I respected immensely yet it never captured me on the level that I'd hoped and like the best memoirs really do. For those who do connect with Ziyad's writing in such a way, "Black Boy Out of Time" has much to say and it says it with conviction and meaning. For others, myself included, "Black Boy Out of Time" is a book that will leave us grateful for Ziyad's desperately needed voice in a world that needs more diverse voices.
March 25, 2021
This was an absolutely phenomenal nonfiction read that I cannot recommend enough, especially for those who read and loved George M. Johnson's All Boys Aren't Blue. Black Boy Out of Time is a heartfelt glance into the authors life growing up queer and Black in a religious household. Ziyad not only shows the reader a deeply personal and raw insight into their life growing up into adulthood, but also illustrates the challenges facing queer people and Black people today, including the introduction of the term 'misafropedia' - the hatred of Black children. This memoir is definitely a must read!
Thanks to Netgalley and Little A for an eARC copy in return for an honest review!
Thanks to Netgalley and Little A for an eARC copy in return for an honest review!
February 15, 2021
i really thought i’d enjoy this, i really wanted to enjoy this, but i didn’t. it felt as if ziyad was trying to smash three books (that would have probably all been strong in their own) into one that felt really jumbled and confused.
if you’ve read any of my reviews you may have noticed that i have a real issue with repetition. the word ‘carceral’ is used a whopping 113 times throughout this text.
if you’ve read any of my reviews you may have noticed that i have a real issue with repetition. the word ‘carceral’ is used a whopping 113 times throughout this text.
February 6, 2021
A powerful and eloquent book- I am so glad I selected it on Amazon’s Prime First Reads. Often times it was so devastatingly sad, but I could not stop reading it. I also found myself smiling at certain parts that filled my heart up.
May 1, 2021
I approached this memoir with great anticipation, knowing Hari Ziyad would further illuminate a black, queer life and hopefully offer comfort in a shared identity to my own. I fortunately received not only a relatable narrative journey, but also an honest, critical analysis of personal racial and sexual vulnerabilities and their societal implications. Coining new language, unpacking institutional baggage, and sourcing relevant, investigative work done before them, the author combines what could easily be an impactful, doctoral dissertation with vivid storytelling. Most striking are the chapters written as letters or prayers to their inner child, engaging introspection as therapeutic conversation, and ultimately recognizing self-actualization as the fullest expression of its voice.
In discharging their trauma and detailing paths to healing, Ziyad never sanitizes for the greater audience, but at the same time, creates space and respect for other paths, histories, and interpretations. Where I differed in practice, I still felt welcomed, and in this current climate, at the height of worldwide digestion of the Black Lives Matter movement and LGBTQ visibility, I find that level of care essential and refreshing for a novel that also wishes to educate. Navigating the landscape of a Muslim father, a maternal lineage in the Hare Krishna tradition (to which they also lean), their grandmother’s mental illness, and poverty in their Cleveland neighborhood of birth, Ziyad reveals their budding queerness in childhood, a preference for non-binary gender expression in maturity, and contradictions within black excellence, spiritual clarity, and community belonging. In bold humility, they also explore their own culpability and perpetuation of harmful ideologies surrounding masculinity, violence, consent, and respectability politics.
Following Hari’s travels, I reflect most fondly on moments of unexpected validation and kinship, and envy their discovery of a partner who not only reaffirms them but keeps them accountable in further growth and their return to tenderness. Dismantling the carceral gaze to black potential and untangling the fears that pervade queer love will take more than our own lifetimes, but I am excited as a reader to add both resources and solace to that effort with this offering.
(5.00 Stars)
February 7, 2021
This is a tough read, because it forces you to think deeply about sociological problems that you wish weren’t there. It took me a little bit to get into the format of this, which consists of bits of philosophy, social critique and memoir, alternating with letters to his child self. The format is an effective way to get his message across. He’s healing himself while at the same time allowing others to confront their racist views and misconceptions of black people. It’s a difficult read, but worth it.
Shelved as 'dnf'
May 19, 2021I have DNF'd this book. I read 22% and the amount of over-explaining and over-writing got to be too much. I can't push it to 23%. There's too much of the wrong stuff!
February 8, 2021
As Black History Month continues in the United States, I was curious about this memoir, offered via the Kindle First Reads program. Never heard of the author, but the title and cover had me super interested. Ziyad is from a blended family and has to navigate the world as a queer, nonbinary person, and what it's like being seen as Black in the United States.
Their memoir covers growing up, trying to figure out their way in the world, their identity, family issues (and drama), sexuality, political/social commentary and more. It's less of a "memoir" as described and more of a constant stream of consciousness. Sometimes the book is more of a memoir, sometimes a manifesto, sometimes commentary on the state of the world, etc.
Overall, I have to agree with the negative reviews. Sometimes it really feels like a stronger editor would have made this into an incredible, tighter work. Sometimes it feels like Ziyad is putting down things that really should have gone into therapy and perhaps stayed there. I respect their experiences and POV, but there are times when it feels like they are simply talking too much. Some parts really are very interesting but I strongly disagree that the text is beautiful or moving.
But again, that is their experiences and Ziyad obviously has a lot to say. But be wared, there are many tough topics ranging from child sexual abuse to rape to racism to anti-Blackness to queerphobia to domestic violence, etc. In the end, it's not an "easy" read by any measure and is not a book that is for everyone.
As mentioned, this was a Kindle First Read borrow for me. I personally would have skipped it but I'm sure there's an audience out there somewhere.
Their memoir covers growing up, trying to figure out their way in the world, their identity, family issues (and drama), sexuality, political/social commentary and more. It's less of a "memoir" as described and more of a constant stream of consciousness. Sometimes the book is more of a memoir, sometimes a manifesto, sometimes commentary on the state of the world, etc.
Overall, I have to agree with the negative reviews. Sometimes it really feels like a stronger editor would have made this into an incredible, tighter work. Sometimes it feels like Ziyad is putting down things that really should have gone into therapy and perhaps stayed there. I respect their experiences and POV, but there are times when it feels like they are simply talking too much. Some parts really are very interesting but I strongly disagree that the text is beautiful or moving.
But again, that is their experiences and Ziyad obviously has a lot to say. But be wared, there are many tough topics ranging from child sexual abuse to rape to racism to anti-Blackness to queerphobia to domestic violence, etc. In the end, it's not an "easy" read by any measure and is not a book that is for everyone.
As mentioned, this was a Kindle First Read borrow for me. I personally would have skipped it but I'm sure there's an audience out there somewhere.
February 5, 2021
DNF
I felt like the first 2/3 of this book were good and points were well made. I couldn’t bring myself to read about childhood sexual abuse, so I skipped that chapter and then I just didn’t want to finish it. I appreciate the author’s point of views and personal truths and respect that. I just lost interest at the end.
I felt like the first 2/3 of this book were good and points were well made. I couldn’t bring myself to read about childhood sexual abuse, so I skipped that chapter and then I just didn’t want to finish it. I appreciate the author’s point of views and personal truths and respect that. I just lost interest at the end.
August 27, 2021
I would give this book more than 5 stars if I could. This book touched me so deeply! I came to it interested in learning about a black queer boy's childhood and was totally blown away with topics that were sensitive to me. The way the issue of abuse was addressed brought me bitter memories that I have to work on.
Hari's experience with his grandmother, who suffered from bipolar disorder, made me see in him a friend with whom I could share the same worries I went through with my mother. I felt as if I could communicate with Hari during the narrative of his grandmother's crises and the mixed feelings we get when we have someone with a mental illness in the family. Is she being mean or is the disorder a cry for help?
The book also shows the author's views on the police and the prison system as a continued intent on keeping black people contained, cast out of society and under control, with the state's unwillingness to promote any rehabilitation.
*
Daria mais de 5 estrelas se pudesse. Esse livro me tocou tão profundamente! Cheguei a ele interessada em saber sobre a infância de um rapaz queer negro e fui surpreendida com tópicos muito sensíveis para mim.
A questão do abuso levantou um poeira que já tinha abaixado há anos em mim e a vivência de Hari com sua avó, que sofria de transtorno bipolar, me fez ver nele um amigo com quem compartilhar essas angústias. Senti como se pudesse me comunicar com Hari durante sua narrativa das crises da avó e o mix de sentimentos que temos quando temos alguém com uma doença mental na família. Será que ela está sendo má ou o transtorno é um pedido de ajuda?
O livro também mostra a opinião do autor sobre a polícia e o sistema carcerário como intenção continuada em manter os negros contidos, lançados fora da sociedade e sob controle, com o desinteresse do Estado em promover reabilitação.
Hari's experience with his grandmother, who suffered from bipolar disorder, made me see in him a friend with whom I could share the same worries I went through with my mother. I felt as if I could communicate with Hari during the narrative of his grandmother's crises and the mixed feelings we get when we have someone with a mental illness in the family. Is she being mean or is the disorder a cry for help?
The book also shows the author's views on the police and the prison system as a continued intent on keeping black people contained, cast out of society and under control, with the state's unwillingness to promote any rehabilitation.
*
Daria mais de 5 estrelas se pudesse. Esse livro me tocou tão profundamente! Cheguei a ele interessada em saber sobre a infância de um rapaz queer negro e fui surpreendida com tópicos muito sensíveis para mim.
A questão do abuso levantou um poeira que já tinha abaixado há anos em mim e a vivência de Hari com sua avó, que sofria de transtorno bipolar, me fez ver nele um amigo com quem compartilhar essas angústias. Senti como se pudesse me comunicar com Hari durante sua narrativa das crises da avó e o mix de sentimentos que temos quando temos alguém com uma doença mental na família. Será que ela está sendo má ou o transtorno é um pedido de ajuda?
O livro também mostra a opinião do autor sobre a polícia e o sistema carcerário como intenção continuada em manter os negros contidos, lançados fora da sociedade e sob controle, com o desinteresse do Estado em promover reabilitação.
February 17, 2021
[...] "is white. They don't get it. Even now, I don't think get do, it ever will. "
An intimate read that feels like reading through Ziyad's journal. A thought provoking read that forces the reader to think critically on important and triggering topics. The author leads a powerful and personal conversation requiring the reader to do their own work in answering biases and wanting for reform. Their story is an emotional and sometimes hard to read one, due to the sensitive topics and extremely open and personal writing style of Ziyad. The author does an amazing job of providing sources allowing the reader to do more research and further understand the information shared. Overall great read that challenges important topics.
An intimate read that feels like reading through Ziyad's journal. A thought provoking read that forces the reader to think critically on important and triggering topics. The author leads a powerful and personal conversation requiring the reader to do their own work in answering biases and wanting for reform. Their story is an emotional and sometimes hard to read one, due to the sensitive topics and extremely open and personal writing style of Ziyad. The author does an amazing job of providing sources allowing the reader to do more research and further understand the information shared. Overall great read that challenges important topics.
March 4, 2021
Illustrious cannot capture the light this brings. With a blend of memoir, ancestral veneration, theory, and love, Ziyad has bestowed to us a gift. If you love life writing, this is top of its class.
Anyone who claims they don't like this memoir should question why it is that Ziyad's honesty about living at the intersections of Black and queer, institutional violence, and finding oneself is disagreeable. The work this writer is doing, and will continue to do, is phenomenal.
Anyone who claims they don't like this memoir should question why it is that Ziyad's honesty about living at the intersections of Black and queer, institutional violence, and finding oneself is disagreeable. The work this writer is doing, and will continue to do, is phenomenal.
January 11, 2023
Loved it. Felt like I was sitting with a friend and had a long conversation about so many important stuff. And I think that's what the author had in mind as they are writing to their younger self. It's filled with understanding and confusion at the same time. And most importantly it's filled with love for theirself, their community and for the whole humanity.
June 2, 2021
Raw, vulnerable, and well written
It felt very important to read someone's account of COVID19 that experienced it very differently than me. I learned a lot and was a huge fan of this book. It touched on topics such as assault, prison abolition, therapy, race, addiction, and sexuality.
It felt very important to read someone's account of COVID19 that experienced it very differently than me. I learned a lot and was a huge fan of this book. It touched on topics such as assault, prison abolition, therapy, race, addiction, and sexuality.
March 1, 2021
Very raw and makes me question my understandings of the inequalities faced by blacks in America today and makes me question what I can really do to help.
February 26, 2023
Some of this book had me completely engrossed but I struggled to keep reading other parts. The content itself is beautiful - an opening up of Hari's soul to the world, sharing all of his raw and real life. The writing style is what waxed and waned for me.
March 2, 2021
Many atrocities done under the banner of white supremacy, especially for blacks, and our society definitely need to protect our children from sex crimes. Aside from those I found this book to be confusing, full of disjointed and illogical thoughts typical of men full of their own shit. The first twenty or so pages about anger and hatred, for real? While he is quick to point out violence against other black and against him, he try to justify his own violent behavior. He dances around issues when it comes to his own problem rather state clearly what happen, makes me think he is not honest with himself. "I drink and do drug because we were poor", how illogical is that, alcohol is the most expensive item on my grocery list, not something I would buy often. Anger sure, being black and gay, having the people you love most not accept you, that I understand, but mostly I felt he is more angry that he can not accept himself, and this book is about trying to find and revert to his true self. action speak louder then words, men's thoughts not worth a darn, they tend to live by their ego, justify their action with false logic and ideology.
March 12, 2021
For someone relatively young, Hari Ziyad has written an incredibly complex and comprehensive memoir, and with stunning beauty. They coin terms like "misafropedia" and "carceral dissonance" to explore their experience of growing up and existing as a Black and queer person within multiple systems. Their therapist suggests inner child work, and the letters to their younger self are simultaneously heartbreaking and hopeful. Ziyad shows tremendous vulnerability and takes responsibility for the hurt they have caused others, all while extending grace and understanding to those who have hurt them. Rather than focusing on the individuals, they look at the anti-Black, anti-queer society as a whole to understand both their history and present. At the same time, to understand their experience is to also investigate and consider what so many others have gone through in the attempt to simply exist in a society that tries to shut them down at every turn and wants to make them hate themselves and those like them. In putting this memoir out there, Ziyad does us a great favor. Selfishly, I hope they continue to share their excellence with us.
March 1, 2021
Read his book!
I was lucky to get this book from Amazon's first reads at the beginning of this month. I saw it is also featured as one of Goodreads recommended memoirs a couple days ago.
Hari is an editor in chief at Racebaitr so you may already be familiar with them. They offer a powerful insight into the life of growing up queer and black in America with a Hari Krishna mother. They often write to their younger self which was a perspective that I enjoyed. This book should be shelved with others in your library about race in America.
I was lucky to get this book from Amazon's first reads at the beginning of this month. I saw it is also featured as one of Goodreads recommended memoirs a couple days ago.
Hari is an editor in chief at Racebaitr so you may already be familiar with them. They offer a powerful insight into the life of growing up queer and black in America with a Hari Krishna mother. They often write to their younger self which was a perspective that I enjoyed. This book should be shelved with others in your library about race in America.
March 16, 2021
Impassioned and important
The author bravely brought to light many racist situations and struggles that have impacted their life. They generously opened their history to clearly illustrate their points. This is an important story, but I cannot overlook the mind-numbing number of times the author uses the word, carceral; twice in a sentence, in adjoining sentences, several times on many pages. When it's time for a reprint, an edit would be nice. Aside from that, this is an author who is doing the work in their own life and I applaud them for their diligence.
The author bravely brought to light many racist situations and struggles that have impacted their life. They generously opened their history to clearly illustrate their points. This is an important story, but I cannot overlook the mind-numbing number of times the author uses the word, carceral; twice in a sentence, in adjoining sentences, several times on many pages. When it's time for a reprint, an edit would be nice. Aside from that, this is an author who is doing the work in their own life and I applaud them for their diligence.
March 4, 2021
This was kinda half memoir, half academic discussion of racism and sexism. All of the specific personal examples helped me understand everyday racism better, rather than the typical talking in the abstract. I admire how willing Ziyad is to be honest about their own faults in order to grow past them. There’s some good recommended reading we can get from this memoir.
November 30, 2020
Love the brutally honest, artful weaving in out of personal stories to broader observations about important issues in society like race, gender, class, etc.
March 8, 2021
***I won this book in a Goodreads Giveaway***
In this memoir, the author explores the conflicting messages they have received as a queer Black person in America, particularly one raised in the Hindu faith. They write with extreme care and consideration for everyone in their life, including their own younger self. If nothing else, I think that's what I want to take from this book...that compassion. It's not simply kindness, but a thoughtfulness and love that comes from attempting to fully understand the people involved.
There were many parts of Hari Ziyad's story I could relate to. There were also parts that were foreign to me and really chaffed until I gave myself space to marinate on what they were saying. There were also parts that as hard as I tried, I simply don't understand their view.
Early on in the book, the author defines certain terms they will come back to over and over again. Misafropedia. Carceral logics. I appreciate why they did that and that these terms are valuable for their understanding but I don't think they were an effective way to communicate it. I found myself counting how often they repeated those words instead of really listening to what was being said.
I might re-evaluate my rating of this book later. It left me with a lot to ponder.
In this memoir, the author explores the conflicting messages they have received as a queer Black person in America, particularly one raised in the Hindu faith. They write with extreme care and consideration for everyone in their life, including their own younger self. If nothing else, I think that's what I want to take from this book...that compassion. It's not simply kindness, but a thoughtfulness and love that comes from attempting to fully understand the people involved.
There were many parts of Hari Ziyad's story I could relate to. There were also parts that were foreign to me and really chaffed until I gave myself space to marinate on what they were saying. There were also parts that as hard as I tried, I simply don't understand their view.
Early on in the book, the author defines certain terms they will come back to over and over again. Misafropedia. Carceral logics. I appreciate why they did that and that these terms are valuable for their understanding but I don't think they were an effective way to communicate it. I found myself counting how often they repeated those words instead of really listening to what was being said.
I might re-evaluate my rating of this book later. It left me with a lot to ponder.
July 19, 2021
I really loved this book.
"In Black Boy Out of Time, Hari Ziyad does something not many writers do: they fuse moving memoir with the complicated workings of carceral logics. This phrase describes the ways in which the carceral (that is, relating to imprisonment) state — in this case America, which has a long and troubled history with fair incarceration and the toll it takes on communities of color — shapes the way people living under it experience the world. Ziyad writes openly about the way in which carceral logics shapes Black experience, their own and others’, from childhood.
Growing up in a large household in Cleveland with a Hindu Hare Krishna mother and a Muslim father, Ziyad, in their youth, experienced a mosaic of spirituality, community, abuse, and complicated love. Black Boy Out of Time recounts the intersection of these moments and not only how they reflected their own state of imprisonment, but also how they translated to Ziyad’s adulthood in New York, where, in forging a future free from the restrictions of their Black youth, Ziyad came to terms with their disruptive past." - from https://www.shondaland.com/inspire/bo...
"In Black Boy Out of Time, Hari Ziyad does something not many writers do: they fuse moving memoir with the complicated workings of carceral logics. This phrase describes the ways in which the carceral (that is, relating to imprisonment) state — in this case America, which has a long and troubled history with fair incarceration and the toll it takes on communities of color — shapes the way people living under it experience the world. Ziyad writes openly about the way in which carceral logics shapes Black experience, their own and others’, from childhood.
Growing up in a large household in Cleveland with a Hindu Hare Krishna mother and a Muslim father, Ziyad, in their youth, experienced a mosaic of spirituality, community, abuse, and complicated love. Black Boy Out of Time recounts the intersection of these moments and not only how they reflected their own state of imprisonment, but also how they translated to Ziyad’s adulthood in New York, where, in forging a future free from the restrictions of their Black youth, Ziyad came to terms with their disruptive past." - from https://www.shondaland.com/inspire/bo...
August 26, 2021
One of my biggest pet peeves with reading autobio’s and self-help books is the evangelical perspective, the “I know everything and this is how we fix the world’s problems”… But in all the books I’ve read, I’ve never found an author that doesn’t do this at least a little bit. Until now.
Ziyad does an impeccable job at explaining what he knows, while still admitting to the fact that he falls under these misafropedias too. That he has anti-Blackness in him, and at times has harmed his Black community too. It has changed the game in how one can write about having “the answers to everything”, and that is by admitting that all these concepts are programmed into our heads at birth, that we will fall into the trap sometimes. That we must be aware of that.
It also led me to realize how there is a spectrum of anti-Blackness and white supremacism. Of homophobia and hatred. Because we live in this carceral system, we cannot escape it completely. All we can do is acknowledge the ways in which we play a role, and do what we can to be as least harmful as possible.
I am simply in awe by Ziyad. His self-reflection. His desire to comfort and embrace his inner child. His views on this world, and understanding of human nature.
Ziyad does an impeccable job at explaining what he knows, while still admitting to the fact that he falls under these misafropedias too. That he has anti-Blackness in him, and at times has harmed his Black community too. It has changed the game in how one can write about having “the answers to everything”, and that is by admitting that all these concepts are programmed into our heads at birth, that we will fall into the trap sometimes. That we must be aware of that.
It also led me to realize how there is a spectrum of anti-Blackness and white supremacism. Of homophobia and hatred. Because we live in this carceral system, we cannot escape it completely. All we can do is acknowledge the ways in which we play a role, and do what we can to be as least harmful as possible.
I am simply in awe by Ziyad. His self-reflection. His desire to comfort and embrace his inner child. His views on this world, and understanding of human nature.
February 5, 2023
(7.9/10) - ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Content warnings can be found here
Black Boy Out of Time is a very intricate and meticulous memoir by cultural critic, screenwriter, and the editor-in-chief of RaceBaitr Hari Ziyad, in which they carefully discuss growing up in America as a Black and queer individual.
Ziyad spends a large portion of the book talking to their younger self, and structuring their memoir like this paved the way for such a kind and love-filled exploration of incredibly difficult topics that you can't help but admire it. It takes a lot to talk about the people who have hurt you with warmth and attempt at understanding, and they did it with such a beautiful style that I'd highly recommend Black Boy Out of Time to those who have read and enjoyed the works of authors like George M. Johnson and Billy-Ray Belcourt.
I did find it repetitive in use of language, however, and while one could argue this to some degree serves a purpose, it became a little too apparent for it to not influence my overall enjoyment. Nevertheless, it's a thought-provoking memoir that definitely deserves the read.
Content warnings can be found here
Black Boy Out of Time is a very intricate and meticulous memoir by cultural critic, screenwriter, and the editor-in-chief of RaceBaitr Hari Ziyad, in which they carefully discuss growing up in America as a Black and queer individual.
Ziyad spends a large portion of the book talking to their younger self, and structuring their memoir like this paved the way for such a kind and love-filled exploration of incredibly difficult topics that you can't help but admire it. It takes a lot to talk about the people who have hurt you with warmth and attempt at understanding, and they did it with such a beautiful style that I'd highly recommend Black Boy Out of Time to those who have read and enjoyed the works of authors like George M. Johnson and Billy-Ray Belcourt.
I did find it repetitive in use of language, however, and while one could argue this to some degree serves a purpose, it became a little too apparent for it to not influence my overall enjoyment. Nevertheless, it's a thought-provoking memoir that definitely deserves the read.
February 28, 2023
This is a 3.5 for me. I find it difficult to rate memoirs though this is written as part memoir, part letter to their younger self, part essay especially in terms of the concepts coined and used throughout (which yes did get repetitive after a while). I found the letters to their younger self to be the more poetic language that was used and in turn enjoyed them more, whereas some of the recollections of different experiences, traumas and interactions with others were written in a more conversational way which didn't always pull me in and make me want to read more. There are some tough topics covered here and overall it feels self-reflective while also trying to capture the impact on larger communities and the US as a whole. It's not a book that pretends to have the answers to the questions it poses about prison abolition for example, and in fact the recapturing of the 'lost inner child' is actually the personal story the author takes you on while giving context to the various ways in which that relationship with the self was frayed over the years and the attempts or distractions involved in mending it.
March 3, 2021
This book is so rich in its complexity. Hari Ziyad blends genres in a way that makes this book hard to define. It’s a memoir but it’s also a critical analysis of race theory as well as a series of letters to their own “inner child.” They write within and beyond these categorizations so that every point that they make is so strong and deep and complex. This book seamlessly combines individual and systemic issues and illustrates their relationship to each other. The writing style is truly a testament to the author’s main argument: liberation.
This is a book of serious self reflection and healing. As a social worker, it really hit so many marks for me and also gave me a lot to think about in terms of my own practice. I’d like to come back to it because there really is so much to gain within these pages.
This is a book of serious self reflection and healing. As a social worker, it really hit so many marks for me and also gave me a lot to think about in terms of my own practice. I’d like to come back to it because there really is so much to gain within these pages.
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