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Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters
Irreversible Damage
is an exploration of a mystery: Why, in the last decade, has the diagnosis "gender dysphoria," transformed from a vanishingly rare affliction, applying almost exclusively to boys and men, to an epidemic among teenage girls?
Author Abigail Shrier presents shocking statistics and stories from real families to show that America and the West have become fertile ground for a "transgender craze" that has nothing to do with real gender dysphoria and everything to do with our cultural frailty. Teenage girls are taking courses of testosterone and disfiguring their bodies. Parents are undermined; experts are over-relied upon; dissenters in science and medicine are intimidated; free speech truckles under renewed attack; socialized medicine bears hidden consequences; and an intersectional era has arisen in which the desire to escape a dominant identity encourages individuals to take cover in victim groups.
Every person who has ever had a skeptical thought about the sudden rush toward a non-binary future but been afraid to express it—this book is for you.
Author Abigail Shrier presents shocking statistics and stories from real families to show that America and the West have become fertile ground for a "transgender craze" that has nothing to do with real gender dysphoria and everything to do with our cultural frailty. Teenage girls are taking courses of testosterone and disfiguring their bodies. Parents are undermined; experts are over-relied upon; dissenters in science and medicine are intimidated; free speech truckles under renewed attack; socialized medicine bears hidden consequences; and an intersectional era has arisen in which the desire to escape a dominant identity encourages individuals to take cover in victim groups.
Every person who has ever had a skeptical thought about the sudden rush toward a non-binary future but been afraid to express it—this book is for you.
276 pages, Hardcover
First published June 30, 2020
About the author
Abigail Shrier
3 books598 followersAbigail Shrier is a frequent contributor to the Wall Street Journal. She holds an A.B. from Columbia College, where she received the Euretta J. Kellett Fellowship; a B.Phil. from the University of Oxford, and a J.D. from Yale Law School. She is a journalist.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,453 reviews
December 14, 2020
This book is not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I assumed this is going to be another hateful book like Correct, Not Politically Correct: How Same-Sex Marriage Hurts Everyone. It's not. Shrier actually has some important points. Unfortunately those points are clouded by the fact she wrote this book for parents instead of the queer community itself.
Essentially, Shrier claims that there's a phenomenon of young teen girls who struggle with mental health issues, go online, end up believing they're transgender and begin to medically transition. They get encouraged by their internet community and by gender therapists. They easily shun their unsupportive parents. Apparently 70% of the people with gender dysphoria just grow out of it naturally and therefore the medical transition is harmful to these people who aren't actually trans. It's important to note that Shrier doesn't claim trans people don't exist. Rather she highlights that the transition process happens too quickly and without enough medical supervision. She suggests teen girls claim to be men as a way to escape womanhood, that they're not men, they're just finding a way to deal with the pains of femininity.
I have much to say about this.
I'll start by saying that I'm not convinced such a problem exists. I mean, yes, being LGBT+ is trendy in certain circles. And I remember that in my teen friend group we all identified as various queer identities. And now, when we're all adults, some of us are still queer and some of us aren't. It's not a big deal. I don't think it's a catastrophe to experiment with your gender and sexuality.
So I do agree with Shrier that medical changes should happen carefully. I don't know about California, but in my country you have to be over 18 to begin physically transitioning (or 16 with parental consent). In general, I've never gotten any kind of impression that doctors are just handing over hormones at a blink of an eye. Shrier says that's what's happening but it just sounds so unrealistic, like there's a hefty process here to get top surgery and I know it's the same in the states.
When it comes to social transitioning, I simply don't understand Shrier's argument. Shrier tries to claim socially transitioning is also harmful because once you come out, telling people you were wrong is hard. In the same breath, Shrier is against educating people about LGBT+ issues. As I see it, if we combine queer education and allow people to experiment, there isn't a problem. We create a space where people can try out LGBT+ identities without being scared of losing credibility. Education comes together with fostering a safe space.
So what's Shrier's solution to this alleged "problem" (see, I can also put things into parenthesis in order to imply they're not real, just as Shrier is fond of doing)? Encourage parents to block out the queer community! She urges parents to take away their kids' phones and remove them from queer friendly spaces, citing a story about parents who sent their kid to live on a farm with no internet. At the same time, Shrier is aware that some people are trans. She interviews several adult trans people who are all living happy lives. She clarifies that this book is only about such teen girls who are confused and not about the broader adult trans community.
The combination of these two is confusing to me. I agree that there are some teens that experiment with being trans but there are also some teens that are actually trans. How is a parent supposed to know which one is their child? Beyond that, by refusing to acknowledge a child's feelings, be it if they're permanent or not, these parents are harming their child. I feel like it's common wisdom that kids grow up and irritate their parents in some way or another. If a teen tries to come out as trans and experiences their parents discrediting them, how will they feel comfortable to share more of themselves to their parents?
Shrier, in her attempts to claim all of these teens aren't "real" trans people goes to ridiculous lengths, such as suggesting that if a child wasn't a tomboy surely they can't be trans. Even if people learn about their identity through the internet, I struggle to understand how Shrier can be so confident that they don't know themselves.
-------------------------------------------
When it comes down to it, despite all of her research, Shrier hasn't entirely grasped the difference between sex, gender, and gender expression. She constantly confuses between them. As much as she mocks the Genderbread Person image, she should take a good look at it and realize that a trans man doesn't claim that he's not assigned female at birth. No one is hiding the existence of a biological sex, just saying that it's not the same as gender. And just because you identify as a man doesn't mean you necessarily adopt only masculine traits. What's the problem with having a beard and also liking glitter?
Shrier simultaneously mocks trans men who have feminine traits and argues that it's okay to be a more masculine woman. If it's okay for a woman to be more masculine, what's the problem with a trans guy who's more feminine? Why does a trans guy need to fit into the gender role in order to be considered valid in Shrier's view?
As I see it, we are making strides towards a world where people can express themselves through gender in any way they wish. That's the true idea of queerness. I think it's very telling that Shrier wrote about Youtubers like Chase Ross but did not mention people like Jamie Raines or Jackson Bird who are living entirely normal adult lives. Not every trans person is very flamboyant and has colorful hair (and even if they did, what's the problem with that?).
-------------------------------------------
I agree with Shrier that there's a romantization of being queer. I came out to thirty people last week and got told that I'm brave like 14 times. In an ideal world, coming out as trans wouldn't require bravery. In an ideal world, the response to me coming out would be "okay, cool".
So what should we do about this? Well, obviously, empowering women is always important. I just don't see a clash between empowering women and empowering trans people. Shrier is against using phrases like "people who menstruate" but it's silly because I get the impression that womanhood isn't equal to a period. The trans community merely highlights that being a woman isn't a biological thing. Are vulvas really the ultimate achievement of women? Shouldn't we celebrate women for their other abilities? Let's redefine femininity to be more than biology.
This book also raises queries about the process of medically transitioning. What's the process someone should go through before they take hormones? What's the role of a therapist? Is gender dysphoria a mental illness that requires a "cure"? These questions do need answers but to be frank, I don't think Shrier is the one who can answer them.
Shrier didn't write this book for the queer community. Her audience isn't us, it's concerned parents. When she describes the questioning teen girls, her focus is the offended parents and not the teens who might be feeling lost. It doesn't feel like she cares about the actual struggle of trans teens. Instead, she's here to support parents who feel like they're losing their child.
Shrier goes on and on about how awful it is that the LGBT+ community encourages people to ditch their families. It's almost laughable because the LGBT+ community doesn't do that. Rather, there's a common phenomenon of people coming out and getting thrown out of their family. The queer community refers to itself as a family as a response to this. If families were more accepting of queer people, maybe they wouldn't feel the need to be so connected to the queer community. How can Shrier simultaneously tell parents to deny their childrens' transness and also blame the queer community for trying to create a surrogate family?
-------------------------------------------
I was really disappointed that there's almost a complete erasure of nonbinary identities. Save for some mean comments about Ash Hardell and a snide remark on they/them pronouns, Shrier doesn't bring this up. This is a shame because I think a conversation about nonbinary identity could help clear things up.
As a nonbinary person, I think I have both feminine and masculine traits (like most human beings) but most importantly, I just don't see a point to dissect myself that way. Rather, I think we allow gender to control too much and I just don't want any part of it. Women can be anything they want but I have no interest or involvement in being a woman. I want to be excluded from this conversation. I don't understand why I'm meant to feel like a woman or what feeling like a woman even means.
And as I see it, Shrier doesn't really have an answer for this. I've thought long and hard about whether this comes from a desire to evade womanhood and I just don't think it does. Sure, being a woman isn't great but I can't help but think that in many ways being trans is worse. I don't see myself as part of a suffering minority, I don't think being nonbinary makes me less privileged. I simply recognize that I don't fit into the square that I should. That's it. So I think it's unfair to claim that teen girls turn to trans identity because they're trying to be special, think women suffer violence because of porn or that the media portrays womanhood as challenging. Like, come on, people aren't this simple.
-------------------------------------------
To conclude, this book is interesting but not more than that. I can't recommend it because I think there are trans writers out there that are tackling these questions better than Shrier. This book is being vilified perhaps more than it should but it's not a great read in any case.
What I'm Taking With Me
- The horror tales about phalloplasty were a little overdone and made me feel a little sick.
- The title of this book is an exaggeration.
- I feel horrified at the idea of parents reading this book and potentially mistreating their trans child.
****************************************
Quarantining like "will I be able to finish my reading challenge in three days". Review to come!
Essentially, Shrier claims that there's a phenomenon of young teen girls who struggle with mental health issues, go online, end up believing they're transgender and begin to medically transition. They get encouraged by their internet community and by gender therapists. They easily shun their unsupportive parents. Apparently 70% of the people with gender dysphoria just grow out of it naturally and therefore the medical transition is harmful to these people who aren't actually trans. It's important to note that Shrier doesn't claim trans people don't exist. Rather she highlights that the transition process happens too quickly and without enough medical supervision. She suggests teen girls claim to be men as a way to escape womanhood, that they're not men, they're just finding a way to deal with the pains of femininity.
I have much to say about this.
I'll start by saying that I'm not convinced such a problem exists. I mean, yes, being LGBT+ is trendy in certain circles. And I remember that in my teen friend group we all identified as various queer identities. And now, when we're all adults, some of us are still queer and some of us aren't. It's not a big deal. I don't think it's a catastrophe to experiment with your gender and sexuality.
So I do agree with Shrier that medical changes should happen carefully. I don't know about California, but in my country you have to be over 18 to begin physically transitioning (or 16 with parental consent). In general, I've never gotten any kind of impression that doctors are just handing over hormones at a blink of an eye. Shrier says that's what's happening but it just sounds so unrealistic, like there's a hefty process here to get top surgery and I know it's the same in the states.
When it comes to social transitioning, I simply don't understand Shrier's argument. Shrier tries to claim socially transitioning is also harmful because once you come out, telling people you were wrong is hard. In the same breath, Shrier is against educating people about LGBT+ issues. As I see it, if we combine queer education and allow people to experiment, there isn't a problem. We create a space where people can try out LGBT+ identities without being scared of losing credibility. Education comes together with fostering a safe space.
So what's Shrier's solution to this alleged "problem" (see, I can also put things into parenthesis in order to imply they're not real, just as Shrier is fond of doing)? Encourage parents to block out the queer community! She urges parents to take away their kids' phones and remove them from queer friendly spaces, citing a story about parents who sent their kid to live on a farm with no internet. At the same time, Shrier is aware that some people are trans. She interviews several adult trans people who are all living happy lives. She clarifies that this book is only about such teen girls who are confused and not about the broader adult trans community.
The combination of these two is confusing to me. I agree that there are some teens that experiment with being trans but there are also some teens that are actually trans. How is a parent supposed to know which one is their child? Beyond that, by refusing to acknowledge a child's feelings, be it if they're permanent or not, these parents are harming their child. I feel like it's common wisdom that kids grow up and irritate their parents in some way or another. If a teen tries to come out as trans and experiences their parents discrediting them, how will they feel comfortable to share more of themselves to their parents?
Shrier, in her attempts to claim all of these teens aren't "real" trans people goes to ridiculous lengths, such as suggesting that if a child wasn't a tomboy surely they can't be trans. Even if people learn about their identity through the internet, I struggle to understand how Shrier can be so confident that they don't know themselves.
-------------------------------------------
When it comes down to it, despite all of her research, Shrier hasn't entirely grasped the difference between sex, gender, and gender expression. She constantly confuses between them. As much as she mocks the Genderbread Person image, she should take a good look at it and realize that a trans man doesn't claim that he's not assigned female at birth. No one is hiding the existence of a biological sex, just saying that it's not the same as gender. And just because you identify as a man doesn't mean you necessarily adopt only masculine traits. What's the problem with having a beard and also liking glitter?
Shrier simultaneously mocks trans men who have feminine traits and argues that it's okay to be a more masculine woman. If it's okay for a woman to be more masculine, what's the problem with a trans guy who's more feminine? Why does a trans guy need to fit into the gender role in order to be considered valid in Shrier's view?
As I see it, we are making strides towards a world where people can express themselves through gender in any way they wish. That's the true idea of queerness. I think it's very telling that Shrier wrote about Youtubers like Chase Ross but did not mention people like Jamie Raines or Jackson Bird who are living entirely normal adult lives. Not every trans person is very flamboyant and has colorful hair (and even if they did, what's the problem with that?).
-------------------------------------------
I agree with Shrier that there's a romantization of being queer. I came out to thirty people last week and got told that I'm brave like 14 times. In an ideal world, coming out as trans wouldn't require bravery. In an ideal world, the response to me coming out would be "okay, cool".
So what should we do about this? Well, obviously, empowering women is always important. I just don't see a clash between empowering women and empowering trans people. Shrier is against using phrases like "people who menstruate" but it's silly because I get the impression that womanhood isn't equal to a period. The trans community merely highlights that being a woman isn't a biological thing. Are vulvas really the ultimate achievement of women? Shouldn't we celebrate women for their other abilities? Let's redefine femininity to be more than biology.
This book also raises queries about the process of medically transitioning. What's the process someone should go through before they take hormones? What's the role of a therapist? Is gender dysphoria a mental illness that requires a "cure"? These questions do need answers but to be frank, I don't think Shrier is the one who can answer them.
Shrier didn't write this book for the queer community. Her audience isn't us, it's concerned parents. When she describes the questioning teen girls, her focus is the offended parents and not the teens who might be feeling lost. It doesn't feel like she cares about the actual struggle of trans teens. Instead, she's here to support parents who feel like they're losing their child.
Shrier goes on and on about how awful it is that the LGBT+ community encourages people to ditch their families. It's almost laughable because the LGBT+ community doesn't do that. Rather, there's a common phenomenon of people coming out and getting thrown out of their family. The queer community refers to itself as a family as a response to this. If families were more accepting of queer people, maybe they wouldn't feel the need to be so connected to the queer community. How can Shrier simultaneously tell parents to deny their childrens' transness and also blame the queer community for trying to create a surrogate family?
-------------------------------------------
I was really disappointed that there's almost a complete erasure of nonbinary identities. Save for some mean comments about Ash Hardell and a snide remark on they/them pronouns, Shrier doesn't bring this up. This is a shame because I think a conversation about nonbinary identity could help clear things up.
As a nonbinary person, I think I have both feminine and masculine traits (like most human beings) but most importantly, I just don't see a point to dissect myself that way. Rather, I think we allow gender to control too much and I just don't want any part of it. Women can be anything they want but I have no interest or involvement in being a woman. I want to be excluded from this conversation. I don't understand why I'm meant to feel like a woman or what feeling like a woman even means.
And as I see it, Shrier doesn't really have an answer for this. I've thought long and hard about whether this comes from a desire to evade womanhood and I just don't think it does. Sure, being a woman isn't great but I can't help but think that in many ways being trans is worse. I don't see myself as part of a suffering minority, I don't think being nonbinary makes me less privileged. I simply recognize that I don't fit into the square that I should. That's it. So I think it's unfair to claim that teen girls turn to trans identity because they're trying to be special, think women suffer violence because of porn or that the media portrays womanhood as challenging. Like, come on, people aren't this simple.
-------------------------------------------
To conclude, this book is interesting but not more than that. I can't recommend it because I think there are trans writers out there that are tackling these questions better than Shrier. This book is being vilified perhaps more than it should but it's not a great read in any case.
What I'm Taking With Me
- The horror tales about phalloplasty were a little overdone and made me feel a little sick.
- The title of this book is an exaggeration.
- I feel horrified at the idea of parents reading this book and potentially mistreating their trans child.
****************************************
Quarantining like "will I be able to finish my reading challenge in three days". Review to come!
July 3, 2020
This just got added to my list of "Books Every Feminist Should Read" and I loved it.
There is a cult out there that is capturing girls who are told that girls and women are weak and boring, and when we exist in a culture that constantly bombards us with reasons why we should hate our bodies and the pinnacle of femaleness is male acceptance, it's no wonder that girls are trying to opt-out in DROVES, permanently damaging their bodies.
"Other giants of history are similarly vulnerable to a "baptism of the dead;" a chance to re-emerge as "non-binary," "genderqueer," or trans. While all this sexual identity politics marches through the front door, a large-scale robbery is taking place: the theft of women's achievement. The more incredible a woman is, the more barriers she busts through, the more "gender non-conforming" she is deemed to be. In this perverse schema, by definition, the more amazing a woman is, the less she counts as a woman."
For anyone who is screaming that the author is transphobic, she is not. She interviewed and befriended dozens of people, including transgender, detransitioned, desisted, and parents of transgender people. Nothing in this book is particularly inflammatory (but it will nevertheless be attempted to be silenced or erased by the people who don't want this opinion getting out) and while you might not be comfortable with the questions being asked or the answers being given, it's an important collection of data and should be required reading.
Transactivism is misogyny, pure and simple. The solution to hating your female body is not cutting parts of it off; it's addressing the messages you're receiving that tell you you're not worthy, not valuable, not incredible and powerful and strong, and telling all of those messages to fuck off. Because being a girl is hard and people lie and social contagion is a thing.
Read this. More than once.
There is a cult out there that is capturing girls who are told that girls and women are weak and boring, and when we exist in a culture that constantly bombards us with reasons why we should hate our bodies and the pinnacle of femaleness is male acceptance, it's no wonder that girls are trying to opt-out in DROVES, permanently damaging their bodies.
"Other giants of history are similarly vulnerable to a "baptism of the dead;" a chance to re-emerge as "non-binary," "genderqueer," or trans. While all this sexual identity politics marches through the front door, a large-scale robbery is taking place: the theft of women's achievement. The more incredible a woman is, the more barriers she busts through, the more "gender non-conforming" she is deemed to be. In this perverse schema, by definition, the more amazing a woman is, the less she counts as a woman."
For anyone who is screaming that the author is transphobic, she is not. She interviewed and befriended dozens of people, including transgender, detransitioned, desisted, and parents of transgender people. Nothing in this book is particularly inflammatory (but it will nevertheless be attempted to be silenced or erased by the people who don't want this opinion getting out) and while you might not be comfortable with the questions being asked or the answers being given, it's an important collection of data and should be required reading.
Transactivism is misogyny, pure and simple. The solution to hating your female body is not cutting parts of it off; it's addressing the messages you're receiving that tell you you're not worthy, not valuable, not incredible and powerful and strong, and telling all of those messages to fuck off. Because being a girl is hard and people lie and social contagion is a thing.
Read this. More than once.
July 27, 2022
This book is full of flawed science and bad surveys masquerading as science. The main study on 'Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria' interviewed exactly Zero trans people and solicited feedback from an anti-trans parenting forum.
This book is absolutely indistinguishable from racist eugenics. It proves the point that transphobia and racism are intertwined. Trans men are men, and not erasing women in any way. Go read Stone Butch Blues, its free and way better.
Edit: Shrier is among the same people saying treating your trans kids with love and compassion is child abuse while at the same time saying that kids should be taken away from loving families. I would ask what's the real irreversible damage? It's not letting your kid cut their hair.
Edit 2: The same bills Shrier supports (Banning all healthcare for trans youth) have now evolved into restricting gender affirming healthcare for people under 25!! You can run for congress, make decisions and lawsfor others, but still wouldn't be old enough for trans healthcare. You can guarantee the fight against our bodily autonomy will not stop with trans people. The same people against trans health are also against reproductive health.
Edit 3: I just want to say I 100% called it that even 1 month after the Supreme Court overturned Roe v Wade, Abigail Shrier has said absolutely nothing about reproductive rights. She's just endlessly tweeting about trans people. Sounds like she doesn't actually care about the wellbeing of women and pregnant people. 🙄 (dated 27july2022)
This book is absolutely indistinguishable from racist eugenics. It proves the point that transphobia and racism are intertwined. Trans men are men, and not erasing women in any way. Go read Stone Butch Blues, its free and way better.
Edit: Shrier is among the same people saying treating your trans kids with love and compassion is child abuse while at the same time saying that kids should be taken away from loving families. I would ask what's the real irreversible damage? It's not letting your kid cut their hair.
Edit 2: The same bills Shrier supports (Banning all healthcare for trans youth) have now evolved into restricting gender affirming healthcare for people under 25!! You can run for congress, make decisions and lawsfor others, but still wouldn't be old enough for trans healthcare. You can guarantee the fight against our bodily autonomy will not stop with trans people. The same people against trans health are also against reproductive health.
Edit 3: I just want to say I 100% called it that even 1 month after the Supreme Court overturned Roe v Wade, Abigail Shrier has said absolutely nothing about reproductive rights. She's just endlessly tweeting about trans people. Sounds like she doesn't actually care about the wellbeing of women and pregnant people. 🙄 (dated 27july2022)
December 14, 2021
Second Edit: lmao this review has gotten a lot more attention than I had ever expected. I do find it funny how angry all the comments are over my opinion on this book. The same people who would cry about "free speech" can't handle me having an opinion and vocalizing it. Anyways just wanted to share this article because I personally feel the parent in it is INSANE. And she talks about using this book as her research for the psychological torment she performed on her child. This is exactly what I was talking about when I say this book will cause harm to kids and teens. (Insert the angry mob over my opinion on this article in 3...2...1)
https://www.dailysignal.com/2021/12/1...
Edit: Yes I read the book. No I will not apologize for disliking it. No I will not apologize for saying "fuck'. No you will not change my mind and I will not change yours. Moving on!
This author and this book are transphobic. I'm disgusted that trash like this is published. This will hurt trans children. Fuck right off.
https://www.dailysignal.com/2021/12/1...
Edit: Yes I read the book. No I will not apologize for disliking it. No I will not apologize for saying "fuck'. No you will not change my mind and I will not change yours. Moving on!
This author and this book are transphobic. I'm disgusted that trash like this is published. This will hurt trans children. Fuck right off.
July 27, 2021
***New Updates below***
Funny to see the trans extremists come out to slam this book. They obviously haven't read it. Several real trans-people were interviewed for the book.
This book is not transphobic for the simple fact that it is not about trans-people. It's about kids who *aren't trans* and have been convinced they are.
edit: It says in the introduction, p. xviii, "This book is not about transgender adults, though in the course of writing it I interviewed many -- those who present as women and the who present as men. They are kind, thoughtful, and decent."
edit #2: OK, finished reading and I think it's great. Other reviewers have commented that the ratings are "all or nothing" and they aren't wrong. When people come on here w/o reading it to give one star, I feel obligated to counter that. I'm not really a critic anyway - I either like things or I don't.
That said, the book is thorough and well-researched. It has interesting insight on how this phenomenon evolved both out of an abundance of goodwill, but also by different groups pursuing their own agendas. I thought it was well-written with some nice turns of phrase. More importantly, it is the rare non-fiction book that will legitimately save someone's life.
edit #3: Glad to see many new likes for this review since the Target ban of this book. Target still lists this book as "sold out" so it's a de facto ban.
People ban books because they fear the truths they tell. This book is not about actual "trans people" so why are they so afraid of it?
Readers of this review, please check out these sites:
https://www.transgendertrend.com
https://www.segm.org
https://post-trans.com
Here are two great, factual reviews of this book:
https://sciencebasedmedicine.org/irre...
https://gendercriticalwoman.wordpress...
Edit #4
One Year anniversary of my review and I still get likes every week. Spread the word. There is a new book from Helen Joyce, an editor at The Economist - "Trans: When Ideology Meets Reality"
https://blackwells.co.uk/bookshop/pro...
It doesn't debut in the USA until Sept 15th, but the above link is to an English bookseller that ships free to the USA.
See also:
https://genspect.org
https://segm.org/news
https://www.partnersforethicalcare.co...
https://www.gendermapper.org
And the 1000s of detransition stories on reddit at https://www.reddit.com/r/detrans/
Funny to see the trans extremists come out to slam this book. They obviously haven't read it. Several real trans-people were interviewed for the book.
This book is not transphobic for the simple fact that it is not about trans-people. It's about kids who *aren't trans* and have been convinced they are.
edit: It says in the introduction, p. xviii, "This book is not about transgender adults, though in the course of writing it I interviewed many -- those who present as women and the who present as men. They are kind, thoughtful, and decent."
edit #2: OK, finished reading and I think it's great. Other reviewers have commented that the ratings are "all or nothing" and they aren't wrong. When people come on here w/o reading it to give one star, I feel obligated to counter that. I'm not really a critic anyway - I either like things or I don't.
That said, the book is thorough and well-researched. It has interesting insight on how this phenomenon evolved both out of an abundance of goodwill, but also by different groups pursuing their own agendas. I thought it was well-written with some nice turns of phrase. More importantly, it is the rare non-fiction book that will legitimately save someone's life.
edit #3: Glad to see many new likes for this review since the Target ban of this book. Target still lists this book as "sold out" so it's a de facto ban.
People ban books because they fear the truths they tell. This book is not about actual "trans people" so why are they so afraid of it?
Readers of this review, please check out these sites:
https://www.transgendertrend.com
https://www.segm.org
https://post-trans.com
Here are two great, factual reviews of this book:
https://sciencebasedmedicine.org/irre...
https://gendercriticalwoman.wordpress...
Edit #4
One Year anniversary of my review and I still get likes every week. Spread the word. There is a new book from Helen Joyce, an editor at The Economist - "Trans: When Ideology Meets Reality"
https://blackwells.co.uk/bookshop/pro...
It doesn't debut in the USA until Sept 15th, but the above link is to an English bookseller that ships free to the USA.
See also:
https://genspect.org
https://segm.org/news
https://www.partnersforethicalcare.co...
https://www.gendermapper.org
And the 1000s of detransition stories on reddit at https://www.reddit.com/r/detrans/
February 7, 2021
It is harmful and dangerous to LGBT people, especially trans teenagers, who are already at risk. This promotes harmful ideology. It is transphobic.
This is one of the most damaging books around & I suggest you DO NOT READ IT.
This is one of the most damaging books around & I suggest you DO NOT READ IT.
September 16, 2021
This is absolute bullshit and I can't believe someone wrote this, someone edited this AND someone published it. Being trans is NOT a fad. More teenagers are coming out as trans because they see representation and are able to understand that how they feel is not wrong. There is no such thing as a "transgender craze". The fact that a cis woman wrote this transphobic bullshit by interviewing a couple of trans people (and quite possibly twisting their words and taking them out of context) doesn't make her an authority on transness. Body dysmorphia doesn't always lead to being trans, any person with a braincell knows that. Kids coming out as trans and having the ability to take hormone blockers which help with their dysphoria PREVENTS irreversible damage on their psyche. This book, however, will do irreversible damage to trans people, especially to trans kids who already face so much stigma. I really hope no trans kid's parents read this and actually believe it.
Edit 2: All the transphobes in the comments, please stop embarrassing yourself with your half-baked arguments with no social or scientific backing. I am having laugh out here, but you all should have some self-respect, really,
Edit: too many transphobes, TERFs, "gender-critical" people or whatever they want to call themselves have found this review and left comments that are hateful and bigoted, so adding a disclaimer that if you're trans, save yourself the hurt and don't look through the comments.
I do not have the time or energy to engage with these people, even if I want to, to let some of this antagonism out, I am going to address some of their talking points for the sake of my own sanity.
1. Trans and nonbinary people have existed since people have existed. This is not a new concept, fad or trend. Read your history, especially decolonised, non-white, non-Christian history.
2. Y'all are asinine for thinking that providing healthcare to trans teens is doing anything other than helping them. First of all, most trans teens do not get access to HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) or surgery until after they are 18. The most they get is puberty/hormone blockers, which are prescribed to cis people on the regular due to multitude of reasons.
3. Going on puberty blockers does not harm anyone (except for the side effects of the meds). Anyone can choose to go through their puberty with the help of hormone therapy later on in their life. So, not going through puberty on the "right time" is reversible but puberty is not reversible.
4. I am writing this 31 March 2021. I have learnt that Arkansas has recently passed an anti-trans law that prohibits healthcare to trans teens. If you don't support trans-specific healthcare for teens, you are supporting violence. Trans people, especially Black trans women, are more vulnerable to all kinds of violence, which includes rape and murder. Laws like this, which prohibit trans teens from going on puberty blockers are created so that transphobic cis people can "clock" trans people easily because going through the wrong puberty makes them less likely to pass. All so that they can discriminate against them, enact hate and violence.
5. Top and bottom surgeries, as well as other trans-specific healthcare, are classified as cosmetic treatments in most countries. So, if you are so concerned about trans people changing their bodies, people show the same concern for cis people who also "modify" their body to fit their aesthetic.
For the love of whatever force of nature you believe in, actually listen to trans people when talking about trans issues, instead of believing harmful stereotypes propagated by transphobic cis people through centuries.
I guess, I will probably add more of these as I encounter more bullshit comments, but I wish all transphobes a very bad day.
Edit 2: All the transphobes in the comments, please stop embarrassing yourself with your half-baked arguments with no social or scientific backing. I am having laugh out here, but you all should have some self-respect, really,
Edit: too many transphobes, TERFs, "gender-critical" people or whatever they want to call themselves have found this review and left comments that are hateful and bigoted, so adding a disclaimer that if you're trans, save yourself the hurt and don't look through the comments.
I do not have the time or energy to engage with these people, even if I want to, to let some of this antagonism out, I am going to address some of their talking points for the sake of my own sanity.
1. Trans and nonbinary people have existed since people have existed. This is not a new concept, fad or trend. Read your history, especially decolonised, non-white, non-Christian history.
2. Y'all are asinine for thinking that providing healthcare to trans teens is doing anything other than helping them. First of all, most trans teens do not get access to HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy) or surgery until after they are 18. The most they get is puberty/hormone blockers, which are prescribed to cis people on the regular due to multitude of reasons.
3. Going on puberty blockers does not harm anyone (except for the side effects of the meds). Anyone can choose to go through their puberty with the help of hormone therapy later on in their life. So, not going through puberty on the "right time" is reversible but puberty is not reversible.
4. I am writing this 31 March 2021. I have learnt that Arkansas has recently passed an anti-trans law that prohibits healthcare to trans teens. If you don't support trans-specific healthcare for teens, you are supporting violence. Trans people, especially Black trans women, are more vulnerable to all kinds of violence, which includes rape and murder. Laws like this, which prohibit trans teens from going on puberty blockers are created so that transphobic cis people can "clock" trans people easily because going through the wrong puberty makes them less likely to pass. All so that they can discriminate against them, enact hate and violence.
5. Top and bottom surgeries, as well as other trans-specific healthcare, are classified as cosmetic treatments in most countries. So, if you are so concerned about trans people changing their bodies, people show the same concern for cis people who also "modify" their body to fit their aesthetic.
For the love of whatever force of nature you believe in, actually listen to trans people when talking about trans issues, instead of believing harmful stereotypes propagated by transphobic cis people through centuries.
I guess, I will probably add more of these as I encounter more bullshit comments, but I wish all transphobes a very bad day.
July 11, 2023
These days, it’s getting a little too easy to call someone a bigot without any supporting evidence and get away with it—even be lauded for it. The 1-star reviews of Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters by Abigail Shrier are a great example of this troubling cultural trend. As of today—3 August, 2020—there are 226 ratings of this book and 40 are 1-star ratings. Of those 40 1-star ratings, only 13 include a review and all of these reviews can be fairly described as relatively short. The longest one weighs in at roughly a paragraph; the majority stop at just a few sentences. Here is a snapshot of how they are describing Shrier’s book:
incredibly transphobic
indistinguishable from racist eugenics (This is some claim...)
harmful and dangerous to LGBT people
absolute bullsh*t
absolute trash
bigoted hackwork
TERF garbage
obviously written by a CIS woman! (I love this one. Who cares about what CIS women think?)
extremely dangerous
scaremongering rubbish
F*ck right off
And my favorite for the way in which it perfectly captures, in all of its glory, the increasing anti-intellectualism of our day:
Nope.
As of today, not one of these reviews interacts meaningfully with Irreversible Damage, not one quotes a line from the book, not one offers any support for conclusions so hastily drawn, and several attribute to Shrier claims that she doesn’t even make in the book (e.g. the reviewer who says, “Body dysmorphia doesn't always lead to being trans, any person with a braincell knows that.” Yeah, Shrier never claims that body dysmorphia "always leads to being trans."
The only thing one can learn about Irreversible Damage from reading these 1-star reviews is that it touches on a major nerve. Why the intense reaction? After reading the book for myself, I suspect that at least some of the anger stems from the painful and unwelcome realization that, if Shrier is right, a great many people have been complicit in practices that are proving very harmful to adolescent girls.
According to Shrier’s research, in the past ten years, the West has seen a dramatic spike in natal girls with no childhood history of gender dysphoria suddenly identifying as trans. Because the issue of gender dysphoria has become so politicized in recent years, doctors, school counselors, and gender therapists, once curious investigators and gatekeepers, are now quick to affirm these girls’ newfound gender identities and usher them toward evermore drastic treatments like puberty blockers, courses of testosterone, and even in some cases double mastectomies, euphemistically referred to in the trans community as “top surgery.”
Can this surge in trans-identifying adolescent girls be explained solely by our society’s increasing acceptance of trans people? That’s certainly one explanation, but what if something else is going on? And if girls are coming out as trans because it’s safer now to do so, why does their mental health often deteriorate during and after transition? Given the vulnerability and impressionability of teen girls and the potentially permanent and life-altering effects of even the most benign of these treatments, I think we owe it to girls to examine the surge from all possible angles.
And that’s exactly what Shrier does in this very helpful and compassionately written book. She examines patterns in internet and social media use among girls who have come out as trans. She considers a culture of therapy that characterizes “normal feelings as illness.” She looks at the relationship between increasingly violent pornography and boys’ rough treatment of girls during sex. (I simply could not believe the shockingly sad statistic cited by Shrier that 13% of sexually active girls between the ages of 14 and 17 report that they have been choked by a boy during a sexual encounter—no wonder girls are wary of sexual intimacy with boys if this is the case.) She looks at how our culture, in an attempt to protect the feelings of trans people, increasingly describes women using dehumanizing terminology such as “breeders,” “bleeders,” “people who menstruate,” and “individuals with a cervix.” She interviews doctors, therapists, and school administrators who “fast-track” trans girls’ demands without investigating whether there is any underlying history of psychological distress, and she wonders to what extent politics has trumped science when it comes to gender dysphoria. There’s a lot more.
I can’t recommend this book enough, especially to parents of girls. And rest assured, this book can only be described as “transphobic” if that word has come to mean nothing more than respectfully challenging the decisions of some trans-identifying people in the service of protecting adolescent girls from doing irreparable harm to their bodies that they may later come to regret. Please take the negative reviews with a grain of salt, and read Irreversible Damage if you have an interest in the well-being of adolescent girls.
incredibly transphobic
indistinguishable from racist eugenics (This is some claim...)
harmful and dangerous to LGBT people
absolute bullsh*t
absolute trash
bigoted hackwork
TERF garbage
obviously written by a CIS woman! (I love this one. Who cares about what CIS women think?)
extremely dangerous
scaremongering rubbish
F*ck right off
And my favorite for the way in which it perfectly captures, in all of its glory, the increasing anti-intellectualism of our day:
Nope.
As of today, not one of these reviews interacts meaningfully with Irreversible Damage, not one quotes a line from the book, not one offers any support for conclusions so hastily drawn, and several attribute to Shrier claims that she doesn’t even make in the book (e.g. the reviewer who says, “Body dysmorphia doesn't always lead to being trans, any person with a braincell knows that.” Yeah, Shrier never claims that body dysmorphia "always leads to being trans."
The only thing one can learn about Irreversible Damage from reading these 1-star reviews is that it touches on a major nerve. Why the intense reaction? After reading the book for myself, I suspect that at least some of the anger stems from the painful and unwelcome realization that, if Shrier is right, a great many people have been complicit in practices that are proving very harmful to adolescent girls.
According to Shrier’s research, in the past ten years, the West has seen a dramatic spike in natal girls with no childhood history of gender dysphoria suddenly identifying as trans. Because the issue of gender dysphoria has become so politicized in recent years, doctors, school counselors, and gender therapists, once curious investigators and gatekeepers, are now quick to affirm these girls’ newfound gender identities and usher them toward evermore drastic treatments like puberty blockers, courses of testosterone, and even in some cases double mastectomies, euphemistically referred to in the trans community as “top surgery.”
Can this surge in trans-identifying adolescent girls be explained solely by our society’s increasing acceptance of trans people? That’s certainly one explanation, but what if something else is going on? And if girls are coming out as trans because it’s safer now to do so, why does their mental health often deteriorate during and after transition? Given the vulnerability and impressionability of teen girls and the potentially permanent and life-altering effects of even the most benign of these treatments, I think we owe it to girls to examine the surge from all possible angles.
And that’s exactly what Shrier does in this very helpful and compassionately written book. She examines patterns in internet and social media use among girls who have come out as trans. She considers a culture of therapy that characterizes “normal feelings as illness.” She looks at the relationship between increasingly violent pornography and boys’ rough treatment of girls during sex. (I simply could not believe the shockingly sad statistic cited by Shrier that 13% of sexually active girls between the ages of 14 and 17 report that they have been choked by a boy during a sexual encounter—no wonder girls are wary of sexual intimacy with boys if this is the case.) She looks at how our culture, in an attempt to protect the feelings of trans people, increasingly describes women using dehumanizing terminology such as “breeders,” “bleeders,” “people who menstruate,” and “individuals with a cervix.” She interviews doctors, therapists, and school administrators who “fast-track” trans girls’ demands without investigating whether there is any underlying history of psychological distress, and she wonders to what extent politics has trumped science when it comes to gender dysphoria. There’s a lot more.
I can’t recommend this book enough, especially to parents of girls. And rest assured, this book can only be described as “transphobic” if that word has come to mean nothing more than respectfully challenging the decisions of some trans-identifying people in the service of protecting adolescent girls from doing irreparable harm to their bodies that they may later come to regret. Please take the negative reviews with a grain of salt, and read Irreversible Damage if you have an interest in the well-being of adolescent girls.
June 30, 2020
This is a must-read for all parents and teachers.
We recognize that young girls often search the internet for support while struggling to navigate the challenges of adolescence, and discover suggestions that may be misleading or injurious. Parents and teachers must now acknowledge the latest movement that similarly threatens their well-being by imposing potentially harmful behaviors. My daughter discovered solutions to her pains from new “friends” she found in support groups who promoted unhealthy solutions such as cutting, suicide, and denouncing family. Therefore, I make a point of studying any information that facilitates my understanding of her process or suggests means of supporting her along the way.
Shrier alerts us to the newest trend in internet support groups that indoctrinate young girls into believing gender identity as the root of all their problems. Its members then coach each other on methods of gender modification as the solution for their dysphoria, from modifying one’s appearance through testosterone injections, and onto surgically transitioning. In this era of gender fluency, girls accept this analysis as accurate, and then seek assistance from professionals whom frequently offer solutions that result in physical and psychological damage.
Though this is shocking, and perhaps initially incredulous, Shrier provides documentation and evidence to support her claims. The personable tone of her prose enables readers to comprehend the message in spite of academic-laden verbiage. Most importantly, she warns us to make note of transformations and episodes that raise concerns, and proposes approaches for preventing any “irreversible damage”. This insight into gender dysphoria strengthens our ability to provide support for girls who seek relief from the pains of adolescence, an essential read for all who are in contact with young girls and women.
We recognize that young girls often search the internet for support while struggling to navigate the challenges of adolescence, and discover suggestions that may be misleading or injurious. Parents and teachers must now acknowledge the latest movement that similarly threatens their well-being by imposing potentially harmful behaviors. My daughter discovered solutions to her pains from new “friends” she found in support groups who promoted unhealthy solutions such as cutting, suicide, and denouncing family. Therefore, I make a point of studying any information that facilitates my understanding of her process or suggests means of supporting her along the way.
Shrier alerts us to the newest trend in internet support groups that indoctrinate young girls into believing gender identity as the root of all their problems. Its members then coach each other on methods of gender modification as the solution for their dysphoria, from modifying one’s appearance through testosterone injections, and onto surgically transitioning. In this era of gender fluency, girls accept this analysis as accurate, and then seek assistance from professionals whom frequently offer solutions that result in physical and psychological damage.
Though this is shocking, and perhaps initially incredulous, Shrier provides documentation and evidence to support her claims. The personable tone of her prose enables readers to comprehend the message in spite of academic-laden verbiage. Most importantly, she warns us to make note of transformations and episodes that raise concerns, and proposes approaches for preventing any “irreversible damage”. This insight into gender dysphoria strengthens our ability to provide support for girls who seek relief from the pains of adolescence, an essential read for all who are in contact with young girls and women.
July 9, 2020
The people leaving 1-star reviews don't seem to be referencing the actual content of the book or have even pretended to read it. The author, for instance, refers to adult trans people by their gender id pronouns and names (contrary to the assertions that she does not in another review).
As a long time supporter of trans people, and someone who has friends and family members who are transgender, I read this and expected to really object to the content. I did not. I shared it with a family member who is trans and he also enjoyed the book and did not find the content objectionable. It is just statistically speaking impossible for everyone who is claiming they are trans to actually be transgender. There does seem to be a clustering phenomenon.
The book is well researched. I think I am a bit more progressive than the author but she did her homework and spoke to many people, including happily transitioned adults and detransitioners.
I wasn't planning to write a review but because of the spate of 1 star/zero content/didn't read the actual book reviews, I decided to. I also bumped my rating from 4 to 5 starts.
As a long time supporter of trans people, and someone who has friends and family members who are transgender, I read this and expected to really object to the content. I did not. I shared it with a family member who is trans and he also enjoyed the book and did not find the content objectionable. It is just statistically speaking impossible for everyone who is claiming they are trans to actually be transgender. There does seem to be a clustering phenomenon.
The book is well researched. I think I am a bit more progressive than the author but she did her homework and spoke to many people, including happily transitioned adults and detransitioners.
I wasn't planning to write a review but because of the spate of 1 star/zero content/didn't read the actual book reviews, I decided to. I also bumped my rating from 4 to 5 starts.
July 13, 2020
this is incredibly transphobic. The author is so worried about why more people are transgender now, maybe it's because a normal human experience is finally being respected and talked about, not because of hate and bigotry.
June 30, 2020
Superbly balanced analysis of a difficult twist on transgenderism, namely Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria. Shrier's skills as an investigative reporter are evident. She offers a combination of statistical data along with a broad range of expert opinion mixed with compelling personal accounts. I taught teenagers for over thirty years but learned much about the power of social media coupled with social isolation. I knew very little about the role played by YouTube influencers. Particularly troubling is the suppression of voices of caution in the medical profession who choose not to simply affirm a young woman's sudden rejection of gender.
Those who feel affirmation, gender suppressing drugs, and life altering surgeries are the only answer will not want you to read this book. Understanding what causes ROGD is critical. Knowing how to deal with it may prevent damage that could be irreversible.
Those who feel affirmation, gender suppressing drugs, and life altering surgeries are the only answer will not want you to read this book. Understanding what causes ROGD is critical. Knowing how to deal with it may prevent damage that could be irreversible.
July 2, 2020
I'm glad more people are talking about this despite the consequences. Godspeed, Abigail.
July 25, 2020
Summary:
Immensely important book on the dangers of trans-activism. Must read.
Am I Trans?
As a teenager, I often found myself estranged from my male friends in several ways. Even though I was not attracted to boys, I did not understand the big fuzz about half-naked women in shows like Baywatch. Because I thought it was the normal thing to do, I hung up posters in my room of Carmen Electra and Alyssa Milano, but it never felt like my decision. Furthermore, I never liked the macho-mimicking behavior I saw around me from class mates and friends. I enjoyed skateboarding and sports, but also (secretly) thought 'Sex and the City' and the 1996 movie 'The Craft' were pretty cool.
Coming from a home where alcoholism, suicide attempts and mental illnesses were the norm, I felt terribly alone among my male friends when hesitantly trying to share my emotions. Their reaction was often either mocking or downplaying, so I decided to keep my thoughts to myself mostly. How envious did I feel sometimes in class, when two girls were braiding each other's hair, being caring and compassionate towards each other. I did not have an outlet for my anger and sadness, resulting in depression and a painkiller addiction at a young age.
Perhaps because I wasn't interested in being macho, I build up close friendships with several girls over the years. It even went so far that I was the only boy allowed in their bedroom by their parents, because it was so obvious that I was not sexually interested in their daughter. All in all, in some ways I was not a stereotypical teenage boy.
Luckily for me, I grew up in the 90's and 00's. Had I been born two decades later, it's highly likely I would have been diagnosed as being 'trans'. Not by sound medical evaluation of extensive therapy and research, but by a radical activist movement that has invaded schools, universities and the medical profession. To test this hypothesis, I Googled 'Am I Trans?', which resulted in numerous online questionnaires you can fill in to determine your trans-likelihood. After filling in to have never worn girls' clothing, never having played with dolls and some other questions, I can still somehow conclude that I am male-to-female-trans. Disturbingly enough, the result of these tests is often determined by the single question 'Do you feel like you are trans?', the answer completely changing the outcome. So there we have it folks, I was born in the wrong body, and I should transition.
Now in my early thirties, I am happy to say I feel very comfortable being a man. I can enjoy both poetry and drawing as well as martial arts and lifting weights. I am happily married to a beautiful woman. And I have a gorgeous five-year-old daughter whom I adore. In hindsight, being a teenager is just a tremendously weird and difficult time for probably everyone, both physically and emotionally. Having read 'Irreversible Damage', I am not looking forward to my daughter reaching that time in her life.
Exposing the Cult
For those who do not live under a rock, 'transgender' is not entirely new. Probably responsible for introducing many people to this term is Caitlyn Jenner, after being known as Bruce Jenner for many decades. As with many important events in an increasingly polarized culture, people have reacted with every emotion on the spectrum; from praise and joy to disgust and anger. Personally, I could not care much less about what another adult decided to do with their body. Some people tattoo their eyeballs, some lift weights for three hours per day, and others take hormones to look more like the other sex. Big deal. I start to care a bit more when others expect me to treat them as something they're clearly not, or when biological males want to compete against biological women in sports. Where I definitely draw the line is when personal decisions turn into cult-like activism that specifically targets children, with no regard for their health.
In 'Irreversible Damage', the brave Abigail Shrier shows how therapists, guidance counselors, social media influencers and other activists are specifically targeting young girls to become trans. The well-being of this especially vulnerable and influenceable group is disregarded, in order to transition them as quickly as possible. What I found most sickening is the willingness with which life-altering hormones are given to teenage girls, literally never once questioning them to find out if they are actually gender dysphoric / trans. From the schools to the psychologists and medical practitioners, the policy of 'affirmative-care' ensures that that the patient's diagnosis is final. As one Dr. Kaufman states:
“I tell them that we can’t change the mind and so we have to change the body.".
Even if somehow it turns out to be a bit more difficult to start your hormone treatment, you can count on the trans-community to help you overcome this:
Her mother was shocked and asked where all this was coming from. “And then I gave her the usual spiel of, ‘Ever since I was little, I just knew I wasn’t a girl’—which isn’t true,” Helena interjected. But by then, Helena’s script was well-rehearsed. “People will literally give you tips on how to alter your story to have a better chance of getting hormones,” she told me.
And if the patient was not yet sure themselves (as is often the case), social pressure from peers and online influencers will give that last little push into the 'right' direction. To quote the author:
"More than one adolescent girl I interviewed told me that whereas “trans” is a high-status identity in high school, “lesbian” is not. It is, in fact, openly derided as a lesser identity—masculine girls who can’t admit they’re supposed to be boys..
One moment you are just an awkward and confused teenage girl, the next moment you are taking testosterone and denouncing your parents for refusing to use the male pronouns your 'glitter family' so happily celebrates.
Cutting off ties with your family? Check
Constantly recruiting new members? Check
Us vs Them Mentality? Check
Almost impossible to leave, no room for dissent, and intimidating people who disagree with your practices? Check, check, check.
This is a cult, no doubt about it.
Sympathy and Snarkiness
This book is very well-researched. It points towards the relative scientific literature, recent history and articles with numerous citations. Above all, the author interviewed hundreds of parents, influencers, scientists, psychologists, counselors and most importantly: (ex)-transgenders. Shrier is surprisingly sympathetic to people she self-admittedly did not expect to like, and overall paints a fair picture of those with an opposing view.
Content-wise, 'Irreversible Damage' could have benefited on some more insight into historical cases of gender dysphoria (as, for example, Camille Paglia sometimes describes), and more similarities with other crazes. The author briefly draws parallels with the current transgender craze and mass cases of for example anorexia or multiple personality disorder, and I would have liked to read more on this. Especially, if existent, when comparing data for these historical events with the current lunacy, it would make for another solid argument. Nevertheless, this doesn't take anything away from the persuasion and emotional impact of the book.
What I disliked most about 'Irreversible Damage', apart from how physically sick it it made me feel, is the snarky remarks of the author. Comments like 'I thought the same, believe me' or 'Your daughter is gone; you now have a son. Mazel tov!' don't add anything to the content, and I fear they might even turn some people off from continuing to read. The author is nuanced and just in her assessment, and the occasional snarkiness takes away from that. Furthermore, I am not a fan of vivid descriptions of where, when and how she met people she interviewed. Yet none of this makes the book any less convincing or effective.
Conclusion
'Irreversible Damage' is an tremendously important book to read in 2020. In the midst of all celebrations for people coming out as transgender, it's easy to miss the dangers increasingly imposed by a cult that doesn't have the best interest of adolescents at heart. While a very few select people are going to be trans, we cannot allow an activist group to prey on young children with the promise of a better life as the opposite sex, only to discover later that the Utopia doesn't exist. This movement needs to be exposed, and Abigail Shrier has done a brave job at doing that. The next step is stopping this madness, if we truly want the best for our children. The last thing I want for my daughter is to some day relate to the following quote from the book:
Perversely, those who promote caution and restraint about transition are demonized. The dangers are legion. The safeguards absent. Perhaps the greatest risk of all for the adolescent girl who grasps at this identity out of the blue, like it is the inflatable ring she hopes will save her, is also in some ways the most devastating: that she’ll wake up one morning with no breasts and no uterus and think, I was only sixteen at the time. A kid. Why didn’t anyone stop me?
Invitation
Goodreads is far from free of trans-activism and the Far Leftist ideology. This is especially obvious when looking at the numerous one star reviews that were published weeks / months before the book was published. So I expect the usual ad hominems and accusations of bigotry in the comments. However, I'd like to offer an invitation to share a counter-narrative with me. Suggest a book that will convince me that administering hormones to or perform surgery on young children without extensive therapy is actually beneficial, and I'll read it. Looking forward to your suggestions.
Immensely important book on the dangers of trans-activism. Must read.
Am I Trans?
As a teenager, I often found myself estranged from my male friends in several ways. Even though I was not attracted to boys, I did not understand the big fuzz about half-naked women in shows like Baywatch. Because I thought it was the normal thing to do, I hung up posters in my room of Carmen Electra and Alyssa Milano, but it never felt like my decision. Furthermore, I never liked the macho-mimicking behavior I saw around me from class mates and friends. I enjoyed skateboarding and sports, but also (secretly) thought 'Sex and the City' and the 1996 movie 'The Craft' were pretty cool.
Coming from a home where alcoholism, suicide attempts and mental illnesses were the norm, I felt terribly alone among my male friends when hesitantly trying to share my emotions. Their reaction was often either mocking or downplaying, so I decided to keep my thoughts to myself mostly. How envious did I feel sometimes in class, when two girls were braiding each other's hair, being caring and compassionate towards each other. I did not have an outlet for my anger and sadness, resulting in depression and a painkiller addiction at a young age.
Perhaps because I wasn't interested in being macho, I build up close friendships with several girls over the years. It even went so far that I was the only boy allowed in their bedroom by their parents, because it was so obvious that I was not sexually interested in their daughter. All in all, in some ways I was not a stereotypical teenage boy.
Luckily for me, I grew up in the 90's and 00's. Had I been born two decades later, it's highly likely I would have been diagnosed as being 'trans'. Not by sound medical evaluation of extensive therapy and research, but by a radical activist movement that has invaded schools, universities and the medical profession. To test this hypothesis, I Googled 'Am I Trans?', which resulted in numerous online questionnaires you can fill in to determine your trans-likelihood. After filling in to have never worn girls' clothing, never having played with dolls and some other questions, I can still somehow conclude that I am male-to-female-trans. Disturbingly enough, the result of these tests is often determined by the single question 'Do you feel like you are trans?', the answer completely changing the outcome. So there we have it folks, I was born in the wrong body, and I should transition.
Now in my early thirties, I am happy to say I feel very comfortable being a man. I can enjoy both poetry and drawing as well as martial arts and lifting weights. I am happily married to a beautiful woman. And I have a gorgeous five-year-old daughter whom I adore. In hindsight, being a teenager is just a tremendously weird and difficult time for probably everyone, both physically and emotionally. Having read 'Irreversible Damage', I am not looking forward to my daughter reaching that time in her life.
Exposing the Cult
For those who do not live under a rock, 'transgender' is not entirely new. Probably responsible for introducing many people to this term is Caitlyn Jenner, after being known as Bruce Jenner for many decades. As with many important events in an increasingly polarized culture, people have reacted with every emotion on the spectrum; from praise and joy to disgust and anger. Personally, I could not care much less about what another adult decided to do with their body. Some people tattoo their eyeballs, some lift weights for three hours per day, and others take hormones to look more like the other sex. Big deal. I start to care a bit more when others expect me to treat them as something they're clearly not, or when biological males want to compete against biological women in sports. Where I definitely draw the line is when personal decisions turn into cult-like activism that specifically targets children, with no regard for their health.
In 'Irreversible Damage', the brave Abigail Shrier shows how therapists, guidance counselors, social media influencers and other activists are specifically targeting young girls to become trans. The well-being of this especially vulnerable and influenceable group is disregarded, in order to transition them as quickly as possible. What I found most sickening is the willingness with which life-altering hormones are given to teenage girls, literally never once questioning them to find out if they are actually gender dysphoric / trans. From the schools to the psychologists and medical practitioners, the policy of 'affirmative-care' ensures that that the patient's diagnosis is final. As one Dr. Kaufman states:
“I tell them that we can’t change the mind and so we have to change the body.".
Even if somehow it turns out to be a bit more difficult to start your hormone treatment, you can count on the trans-community to help you overcome this:
Her mother was shocked and asked where all this was coming from. “And then I gave her the usual spiel of, ‘Ever since I was little, I just knew I wasn’t a girl’—which isn’t true,” Helena interjected. But by then, Helena’s script was well-rehearsed. “People will literally give you tips on how to alter your story to have a better chance of getting hormones,” she told me.
And if the patient was not yet sure themselves (as is often the case), social pressure from peers and online influencers will give that last little push into the 'right' direction. To quote the author:
"More than one adolescent girl I interviewed told me that whereas “trans” is a high-status identity in high school, “lesbian” is not. It is, in fact, openly derided as a lesser identity—masculine girls who can’t admit they’re supposed to be boys..
One moment you are just an awkward and confused teenage girl, the next moment you are taking testosterone and denouncing your parents for refusing to use the male pronouns your 'glitter family' so happily celebrates.
Cutting off ties with your family? Check
Constantly recruiting new members? Check
Us vs Them Mentality? Check
Almost impossible to leave, no room for dissent, and intimidating people who disagree with your practices? Check, check, check.
This is a cult, no doubt about it.
Sympathy and Snarkiness
This book is very well-researched. It points towards the relative scientific literature, recent history and articles with numerous citations. Above all, the author interviewed hundreds of parents, influencers, scientists, psychologists, counselors and most importantly: (ex)-transgenders. Shrier is surprisingly sympathetic to people she self-admittedly did not expect to like, and overall paints a fair picture of those with an opposing view.
Content-wise, 'Irreversible Damage' could have benefited on some more insight into historical cases of gender dysphoria (as, for example, Camille Paglia sometimes describes), and more similarities with other crazes. The author briefly draws parallels with the current transgender craze and mass cases of for example anorexia or multiple personality disorder, and I would have liked to read more on this. Especially, if existent, when comparing data for these historical events with the current lunacy, it would make for another solid argument. Nevertheless, this doesn't take anything away from the persuasion and emotional impact of the book.
What I disliked most about 'Irreversible Damage', apart from how physically sick it it made me feel, is the snarky remarks of the author. Comments like 'I thought the same, believe me' or 'Your daughter is gone; you now have a son. Mazel tov!' don't add anything to the content, and I fear they might even turn some people off from continuing to read. The author is nuanced and just in her assessment, and the occasional snarkiness takes away from that. Furthermore, I am not a fan of vivid descriptions of where, when and how she met people she interviewed. Yet none of this makes the book any less convincing or effective.
Conclusion
'Irreversible Damage' is an tremendously important book to read in 2020. In the midst of all celebrations for people coming out as transgender, it's easy to miss the dangers increasingly imposed by a cult that doesn't have the best interest of adolescents at heart. While a very few select people are going to be trans, we cannot allow an activist group to prey on young children with the promise of a better life as the opposite sex, only to discover later that the Utopia doesn't exist. This movement needs to be exposed, and Abigail Shrier has done a brave job at doing that. The next step is stopping this madness, if we truly want the best for our children. The last thing I want for my daughter is to some day relate to the following quote from the book:
Perversely, those who promote caution and restraint about transition are demonized. The dangers are legion. The safeguards absent. Perhaps the greatest risk of all for the adolescent girl who grasps at this identity out of the blue, like it is the inflatable ring she hopes will save her, is also in some ways the most devastating: that she’ll wake up one morning with no breasts and no uterus and think, I was only sixteen at the time. A kid. Why didn’t anyone stop me?
Invitation
Goodreads is far from free of trans-activism and the Far Leftist ideology. This is especially obvious when looking at the numerous one star reviews that were published weeks / months before the book was published. So I expect the usual ad hominems and accusations of bigotry in the comments. However, I'd like to offer an invitation to share a counter-narrative with me. Suggest a book that will convince me that administering hormones to or perform surgery on young children without extensive therapy is actually beneficial, and I'll read it. Looking forward to your suggestions.
July 2, 2020
Balanced, well-researched book. Contrary to what some reviewers have claimed, this is NOT a rant against trans people or gender dysphoria. Read the book and learn. I did.
July 2, 2020
Abigail Shrier's Irreversible Damage presents an important wake-up alarm for parents, therapists, physicians and teachers. Through her impeccable research, Ms. Shrier clearly distinguishes genuine gender dysphoria from the sudden surge in transgender identification among young women today. With compassion for the young women caught in this craze and their parents, she describes the weak-kneed failure of counselors, teachers and physicians to aid their search through a morass of peer pressure. A beautifully written must-read for anyone who cares about our girls and young women!
July 22, 2020
Nope.
EDIT: After seeing an interview with the author, I'd like to amend my review to "f**k no".
EDIT: After seeing an interview with the author, I'd like to amend my review to "f**k no".
July 15, 2020
Terrible biased piece of bigoted hackwork.
August 10, 2020
This book advocates conversion therapy for trans children. It sucks! Conversion therapy like the therapy this book advocates has been directed at trans children for decades; I was subjected to it briefly before my parents realized that there were other models of responding to teen transition that resulted in parenting a less suicidal teen. Conversion therapy like this book describes traumatizes many trans people and makes it much more difficult for us to survive!
This book is written from an angle of panic about trans people existing at all, but it also has a lot of anxiety about trans boys and men reducing their fertility via transition, which I think is really fucking weird— and also doesn’t engage with how many trans men still choose to get pregnant. Pretty bad.
This book is written from an angle of panic about trans people existing at all, but it also has a lot of anxiety about trans boys and men reducing their fertility via transition, which I think is really fucking weird— and also doesn’t engage with how many trans men still choose to get pregnant. Pretty bad.
June 30, 2020
Must read in our crazy times when people try to deny the existance of biological sex.
All the authors of 1star reviews simply cannot handle a countra argument. Using the word "transphobic" has become a trend now (facepalm).
Read this book!!
All the authors of 1star reviews simply cannot handle a countra argument. Using the word "transphobic" has become a trend now (facepalm).
Read this book!!
July 17, 2020
Do not read. This book is harmful and transphobic, written by a cis-woman allegedly worried about children being harmed - but not worried about the harm she is doing to trans children. There's no such thing as a 'transgender craze' and this book is potentially extremely dangerous.
July 23, 2020
It’s Time to Remove the ROGD from the LGBT
I’m a retired nurse who worked pediatrics, emergency room, and several years on an Eating Disorder Unit before working 20+ years as a school nurse. I took care of infants born with gender ambiguity, children with genetic and endocrine issues that often did not exhibit gender issues until puberty, and a few who knew as toddlers of their reasons for undergoing gender reassignment in late teens. Let me emphatically state that there are genuine medical and other reasons for some to identify as transgendered. We must all affirm and be advocates for these individuals.
But what surprised me as I volunteer in schools since retirement is the frequency of a sudden cluster of teen girls who were often girly girls but now assert a transsexual male identity. Lisa Littman, a pediatric researcher and Brown University professor coined the term, Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria (ROGD) to describe this phenomenon. JK Rowling noticed the same trend and began speaking about it (though not as logically as needed). Both are being harshly criticized as transphobic for speaking out about this epidemic. Yet someone needs to alert parents, school personnel, and even medical practitioners of this trend.
The personal stories that Shrier relates are almost identical to what I hear from parents and teachers. And similar to what I saw as a nurse on the eating disorder unit. A highly gifted (often with Asperger’s), girl puts her own perfectionist standards on herself resulting in stress, anxiety, and often depression. She is intelligent enough to know she is different and to seek her own answers. For the teen with an eating disorder it was “If only I am thin enough, my problems will go away.” The cutting and goth phenomena of a decade ago was a response to depression, a symbolic attempt to release the pain. And now the response for the girls who are often immature for their chronological age is, “I’m not like other girls so I must be a boy.”
If these girls sought therapy for depression and a cause for their anxiety was explored, traditional psychotherapy may have been enough to ease them through these awkward and difficult years. As with other teens, those with similar likes and issues find each other. Females especially like and need to express their feelings leading others to feel “me, too” and give affirmation. In the past a group, may diet together but only one or possibly two would take it to an extreme. Same for the teens who cut. But as with all things this day, there are social media sites and influencers pushing their ideas as if they are experts. Some of these girls may be questioning their sexuality and previously would have emerged as gay. But now internet searches about gender leads to quizzes such as, “Are You Gay or Are You Trans?” The algorithms then lead them deeper and deeper into sites that tell about how to get testosterone therapy or “ top surgery” and to disown all who continue to refer to you as your “dead name.” Those in their trans circle of friends and/or internet sites replace their former friends and family. They threaten suicide if questioned leading parents to accept or become excommunicated if they question their child.
So a mainstream book on this subject was definitely needed. Unfortunately, this book has a subtle bias that may prevent general acceptance, especially by LGBT groups and their advocates. Shrier is known as a conservative activist and some of that bias is evident in the book. Parents who openly accept LGBT and diversity are described as liberals whose coddling may have contributed to their daughter’s path. Gender acceptance by schools is also discussed as a factor. It needs repeated again: Transgendered individuals do need our support but ROGD is different. The characteristics of those with autism and the relationship to gender issues was just briefly mentioned. Yet, it is an area that my experience tells me needs greater research as the personality traits of these girls and those with eating disorders would be closely overlapping circles on a Venn Diagram.
Despite these deficiencies, I recommend all parents, school personnel, and medical professionals read the book. Then support the silent screams for help from the girls and their parents. Familiarize yourselves with the influencer and coaching sites that instruct girls how to get a fast track to irreversible surgery. Therapists, don’t buy into the automatic affirmation modalities until proper screening and diagnosis is confirmed. Get parent and school input as you do with other mental health issues such as ADHD, anxiety, and depression. Doctors and clinics, do not automatically dispense gender altering hormonal therapy based upon a self report of dysphoria. And to surgeons: DO NOT PERFORM IRREVERSIBLE SURGERY AS AN EASY FIX FOR TEEN GIRLS WHO ARE EXPERIENCING MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES. To everyone else, read the book and see why it is appropriately named. And please continue to advocate for the LGBT community but stress that ROGD needs different assessment and treatment.
I’m a retired nurse who worked pediatrics, emergency room, and several years on an Eating Disorder Unit before working 20+ years as a school nurse. I took care of infants born with gender ambiguity, children with genetic and endocrine issues that often did not exhibit gender issues until puberty, and a few who knew as toddlers of their reasons for undergoing gender reassignment in late teens. Let me emphatically state that there are genuine medical and other reasons for some to identify as transgendered. We must all affirm and be advocates for these individuals.
But what surprised me as I volunteer in schools since retirement is the frequency of a sudden cluster of teen girls who were often girly girls but now assert a transsexual male identity. Lisa Littman, a pediatric researcher and Brown University professor coined the term, Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria (ROGD) to describe this phenomenon. JK Rowling noticed the same trend and began speaking about it (though not as logically as needed). Both are being harshly criticized as transphobic for speaking out about this epidemic. Yet someone needs to alert parents, school personnel, and even medical practitioners of this trend.
The personal stories that Shrier relates are almost identical to what I hear from parents and teachers. And similar to what I saw as a nurse on the eating disorder unit. A highly gifted (often with Asperger’s), girl puts her own perfectionist standards on herself resulting in stress, anxiety, and often depression. She is intelligent enough to know she is different and to seek her own answers. For the teen with an eating disorder it was “If only I am thin enough, my problems will go away.” The cutting and goth phenomena of a decade ago was a response to depression, a symbolic attempt to release the pain. And now the response for the girls who are often immature for their chronological age is, “I’m not like other girls so I must be a boy.”
If these girls sought therapy for depression and a cause for their anxiety was explored, traditional psychotherapy may have been enough to ease them through these awkward and difficult years. As with other teens, those with similar likes and issues find each other. Females especially like and need to express their feelings leading others to feel “me, too” and give affirmation. In the past a group, may diet together but only one or possibly two would take it to an extreme. Same for the teens who cut. But as with all things this day, there are social media sites and influencers pushing their ideas as if they are experts. Some of these girls may be questioning their sexuality and previously would have emerged as gay. But now internet searches about gender leads to quizzes such as, “Are You Gay or Are You Trans?” The algorithms then lead them deeper and deeper into sites that tell about how to get testosterone therapy or “ top surgery” and to disown all who continue to refer to you as your “dead name.” Those in their trans circle of friends and/or internet sites replace their former friends and family. They threaten suicide if questioned leading parents to accept or become excommunicated if they question their child.
So a mainstream book on this subject was definitely needed. Unfortunately, this book has a subtle bias that may prevent general acceptance, especially by LGBT groups and their advocates. Shrier is known as a conservative activist and some of that bias is evident in the book. Parents who openly accept LGBT and diversity are described as liberals whose coddling may have contributed to their daughter’s path. Gender acceptance by schools is also discussed as a factor. It needs repeated again: Transgendered individuals do need our support but ROGD is different. The characteristics of those with autism and the relationship to gender issues was just briefly mentioned. Yet, it is an area that my experience tells me needs greater research as the personality traits of these girls and those with eating disorders would be closely overlapping circles on a Venn Diagram.
Despite these deficiencies, I recommend all parents, school personnel, and medical professionals read the book. Then support the silent screams for help from the girls and their parents. Familiarize yourselves with the influencer and coaching sites that instruct girls how to get a fast track to irreversible surgery. Therapists, don’t buy into the automatic affirmation modalities until proper screening and diagnosis is confirmed. Get parent and school input as you do with other mental health issues such as ADHD, anxiety, and depression. Doctors and clinics, do not automatically dispense gender altering hormonal therapy based upon a self report of dysphoria. And to surgeons: DO NOT PERFORM IRREVERSIBLE SURGERY AS AN EASY FIX FOR TEEN GIRLS WHO ARE EXPERIENCING MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES. To everyone else, read the book and see why it is appropriately named. And please continue to advocate for the LGBT community but stress that ROGD needs different assessment and treatment.
July 5, 2020
Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters by Abigail Shrier is a very highly recommended objective, balanced examination and exploration of the current and dramatic increase of the number of teenage girls identifying as transgender. According to the CDC, currently over 2% of high school students, overwhelmingly girls, identify as transgender when historically gender dysphoria (severe discomfort with one's biological sex) was .01% of the population and almost exclusively male. Gender dysphoria usually emerges early in childhood. Today, however there is an overwhelming surge of adolescent girls claiming to have gender dysphoria and are self-identifying as transgender.
Puberty is hard on girls. (I know; I understand.) Adding to the stress of your changing body is the cruelty and criticism girls inflict upon themselves and others. They are in genuine pain. As Shrier points out this transgender movement in young girls is a new social contagion. We know it is a social contagion because it is so statistically new and overwhelmingly high in numbers. Often this is concentrated among a group of peers or around a specific community or school system. Girls are learning about this through school programs, but especially through social media influencers. We all know that social media can make everyone anxious and sad, however, it affects adolescent girls are the hardest. "[A]dolescent girls, who historically faced life’s challenges in pairs and groups, are now more likely to face them alone." These are girls who are isolated from other people and turn overwhelmingly to social media for their support and information. This gives them a community, acceptance, and the opportunity to escape into a victim identity, which gives them support immediately. Being transgender is one of the few you can choose.
When talking to a counselor or therapist, the young girls often are encourage to quickly start puberty blockers, or testosterone, and look toward top surgery (double mastectomy), all of which inflict irreversible damage on their bodies. It seems appropriate (to me) to have a requirement that young people wait until their brains mature before being encouraged to make such life changing decisions. "The prefrontal cortex, believed to hold the seat of self-regulation, typically does not complete development until age 25." Certainly you can live as a man and later, after age 25-28 once your brain has reached maturity, you can look into hormones or surgery. Shrier makes a good point that this transgender craze may partially be the result of over-parented kids desperate to stake out territory for rebellion.
"According to Dr. Zucker, the mere fact that patients may have fixated on gender as a source of their problems does not mean that that they are right or that transitioning will alleviate their distress. "I said to this kid, ‘I don’t care if you have a male brain or a female brain. This is how you’re feeling currently and we need to figure out why you’re feeling this way and what is the best way to help you lose this dysphoria.’ " It is worth asking whether a standard guided less by biology than by political correctness is in the best interest of patients. Allow their brains to mature, pass the age of rebellion, before making life changing decisions that will affect their health. "Teens and tweens today are everywhere pressed to locate themselves on a gender spectrum and within a sexuality taxonomy - long before they have finished the sexual development that would otherwise guide discovery of who they are or what they desire."
Shrier talked to trans people, parents, influencers, doctors, academics, and professionals on both sides of the issue in this informative, well written and presented examination of this current trend. This is not a transphobic book, unless information is something to be feared. She ended the book with seven rules that were wonderful for reasons beyond the topic at hand: 1. Don’t Get Your Kid a Smartphone 2. Don’t Relinquish Your Authority as the Parent 3. Don’t Support Gender Ideology in Your Child’s Education 4. Reintroduce Privacy into the Home - Quit the habit of sharing every part of your lives (and theirs) on the internet. 5. Consider Big Steps to Separate Your Daughter from Harm 6. Stop Pathologizing Girlhood 7. Don’t be Afraid to Admit: It’s Wonderful to Be a Girl.
I totally agree with this closing remark from Shrier because it seems that being female has lost favor with the broader culture and there is a war against it: "But for Pete’s sake, whatever type of women young girls become, they should all listen to feminists of a prior era and stop taking sex stereotypes seriously. A young woman can be an astronaut or a nurse; a girl can play with trucks or with dolls. And she may find herself attracted to men or to other women. None of that makes her any less of a girl or any less suited to womanhood."
Disclosure: My review copy was courtesy of Regnery Publishing.
http://www.shetreadssoftly.com/2020/0...
Puberty is hard on girls. (I know; I understand.) Adding to the stress of your changing body is the cruelty and criticism girls inflict upon themselves and others. They are in genuine pain. As Shrier points out this transgender movement in young girls is a new social contagion. We know it is a social contagion because it is so statistically new and overwhelmingly high in numbers. Often this is concentrated among a group of peers or around a specific community or school system. Girls are learning about this through school programs, but especially through social media influencers. We all know that social media can make everyone anxious and sad, however, it affects adolescent girls are the hardest. "[A]dolescent girls, who historically faced life’s challenges in pairs and groups, are now more likely to face them alone." These are girls who are isolated from other people and turn overwhelmingly to social media for their support and information. This gives them a community, acceptance, and the opportunity to escape into a victim identity, which gives them support immediately. Being transgender is one of the few you can choose.
When talking to a counselor or therapist, the young girls often are encourage to quickly start puberty blockers, or testosterone, and look toward top surgery (double mastectomy), all of which inflict irreversible damage on their bodies. It seems appropriate (to me) to have a requirement that young people wait until their brains mature before being encouraged to make such life changing decisions. "The prefrontal cortex, believed to hold the seat of self-regulation, typically does not complete development until age 25." Certainly you can live as a man and later, after age 25-28 once your brain has reached maturity, you can look into hormones or surgery. Shrier makes a good point that this transgender craze may partially be the result of over-parented kids desperate to stake out territory for rebellion.
"According to Dr. Zucker, the mere fact that patients may have fixated on gender as a source of their problems does not mean that that they are right or that transitioning will alleviate their distress. "I said to this kid, ‘I don’t care if you have a male brain or a female brain. This is how you’re feeling currently and we need to figure out why you’re feeling this way and what is the best way to help you lose this dysphoria.’ " It is worth asking whether a standard guided less by biology than by political correctness is in the best interest of patients. Allow their brains to mature, pass the age of rebellion, before making life changing decisions that will affect their health. "Teens and tweens today are everywhere pressed to locate themselves on a gender spectrum and within a sexuality taxonomy - long before they have finished the sexual development that would otherwise guide discovery of who they are or what they desire."
Shrier talked to trans people, parents, influencers, doctors, academics, and professionals on both sides of the issue in this informative, well written and presented examination of this current trend. This is not a transphobic book, unless information is something to be feared. She ended the book with seven rules that were wonderful for reasons beyond the topic at hand: 1. Don’t Get Your Kid a Smartphone 2. Don’t Relinquish Your Authority as the Parent 3. Don’t Support Gender Ideology in Your Child’s Education 4. Reintroduce Privacy into the Home - Quit the habit of sharing every part of your lives (and theirs) on the internet. 5. Consider Big Steps to Separate Your Daughter from Harm 6. Stop Pathologizing Girlhood 7. Don’t be Afraid to Admit: It’s Wonderful to Be a Girl.
I totally agree with this closing remark from Shrier because it seems that being female has lost favor with the broader culture and there is a war against it: "But for Pete’s sake, whatever type of women young girls become, they should all listen to feminists of a prior era and stop taking sex stereotypes seriously. A young woman can be an astronaut or a nurse; a girl can play with trucks or with dolls. And she may find herself attracted to men or to other women. None of that makes her any less of a girl or any less suited to womanhood."
Disclosure: My review copy was courtesy of Regnery Publishing.
http://www.shetreadssoftly.com/2020/0...
August 10, 2020
Haha cool book. Not!!! It's so bad I almost couldn't enjoy the ligma I'd set aside for this afternoon.
July 4, 2020
A must read for anyone wondering whether there's anything behind the sudden increase in FtM teenagers.
March 5, 2021
Hello, I am a trans man.
I've read your book and I have to say its because of people like you I was unable to come out for years. People saying this isn't transphobic? A cisgender person has NO RIGHT to talk about what is and isn't trans. If you have not experienced the horrendous feeling of gender dysphoria- staring into the mirror sobbing because the body in front of you doesn't match your mind- YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHT TO SAY ANYTHING.
This is blatant transphobia with racist undertones.
Even if it was just a trend is it so bad for a child to explore their gender in a safe and welcoming environment.
You fucking disgust me Abigail Shrier.
I hope you educate yourself one day.
The fact that I can't safely search the LGBTQ+ tag without seeing your book also disgusts me. That tag should be a safe place for gay people to find books FOR them.
I've read your book and I have to say its because of people like you I was unable to come out for years. People saying this isn't transphobic? A cisgender person has NO RIGHT to talk about what is and isn't trans. If you have not experienced the horrendous feeling of gender dysphoria- staring into the mirror sobbing because the body in front of you doesn't match your mind- YOU HAVE NO FUCKING RIGHT TO SAY ANYTHING.
This is blatant transphobia with racist undertones.
Even if it was just a trend is it so bad for a child to explore their gender in a safe and welcoming environment.
You fucking disgust me Abigail Shrier.
I hope you educate yourself one day.
The fact that I can't safely search the LGBTQ+ tag without seeing your book also disgusts me. That tag should be a safe place for gay people to find books FOR them.
July 7, 2020
A frightening but must read
I came to this book because I read the author’s article last year in the Wall Street Journal. If you have a tween or teen daughter this should be the next book that you read. I am always amazed that the law of unintended consequence is ignored so often especially in making laws. I was shocked that the Affordable Care Act plays such a pivotal point in the epidemic.
I came to this book because I read the author’s article last year in the Wall Street Journal. If you have a tween or teen daughter this should be the next book that you read. I am always amazed that the law of unintended consequence is ignored so often especially in making laws. I was shocked that the Affordable Care Act plays such a pivotal point in the epidemic.
June 5, 2021
Highly recommend. A must read to understand why this gender craze has taken hold of teenage girls. Clue: online indoctrination is one part, Queer theory taking over all schools under the guise of “anti-bullying”, another. Children are taught to question their gender and sexuality before they’ve even developed an actual sexuality. Parents are being lied to about a movement partly pushed through to sow confusion, division & anarchy. The well-meaning general public is deliberately kept uninformed on any other perspectives on the issues by liberal media, which has forced lifelong liberals like me to turn to conservative outlets who are the only ones who will publish unpopular views, which are anything to do with factual information.
I’ve been researching this on my own for several years now. This trend is very disturbing to me as someone who had a self-destructive adolescence which landed me in max security detention to protect me from MYSELF. Because I was self-harming in various ways, which is what girls are now doing by using binders & wanting their breasts amputated while still in their teens. I have no doubts at all that I, a tomboy and atypical girl, abused before puberty, & neurodivergent too, as it turns out, would have fallen under the spell of the gender siren song.
Queer theory can be summed up very simply: the goal is the removal of ALL safeguards. And access to children is key. Queer theorists embrace paedophelia & incest, though of course this isn’t much spoken of because this movement has been operating by stealth for decades. What is problematic to most “gender-critical” people like me is the fact this movement shields abusers and hurts even the interests of transgender people who don’t want to pretend biology is a spectrum in & of itself.
FYI bumped up my rating from 4 to 5 stars to even out all the 1-star reviews by activists who object to anything at all being said about this movement which isn't 150% supportive of transing the world. Trans people definitely should have rights & respect. But they are a tiny minority of the population. This movement, widely supported by the establishment & corporations is a massive propaganda machine designed to keep people in medical treatment for the rest of their lives when underlying conditions for their fixation with “gender identity” isn’t ever considered because asking questions is considered transphobic.
How affirming a child who is bound to change their mind about things in the normal course of life to medically halt puberty and endanger their health is a scandal which will have many legal repercussions in future. The Keira Bell case is just one of many more to come.
Bonus!
What a surprise! The father of Queer Theory is a paedo! https://grahamlinehan.substack.com/p/...
In response to a comment by someone saying "I might read this book", I've added the following: Can't hurt. It's informative and if you have children or are yourself a young person, these are things you need to know to combat what is literally a cult. Have I mentioned Martine Rothblatt? "She" has a cult called transhumanism and wants to cure death. "She" was involved in the gene sequencing project. "She" is a dangerous individual with a Ted Talk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTJpJ...
I’ve been researching this on my own for several years now. This trend is very disturbing to me as someone who had a self-destructive adolescence which landed me in max security detention to protect me from MYSELF. Because I was self-harming in various ways, which is what girls are now doing by using binders & wanting their breasts amputated while still in their teens. I have no doubts at all that I, a tomboy and atypical girl, abused before puberty, & neurodivergent too, as it turns out, would have fallen under the spell of the gender siren song.
Queer theory can be summed up very simply: the goal is the removal of ALL safeguards. And access to children is key. Queer theorists embrace paedophelia & incest, though of course this isn’t much spoken of because this movement has been operating by stealth for decades. What is problematic to most “gender-critical” people like me is the fact this movement shields abusers and hurts even the interests of transgender people who don’t want to pretend biology is a spectrum in & of itself.
FYI bumped up my rating from 4 to 5 stars to even out all the 1-star reviews by activists who object to anything at all being said about this movement which isn't 150% supportive of transing the world. Trans people definitely should have rights & respect. But they are a tiny minority of the population. This movement, widely supported by the establishment & corporations is a massive propaganda machine designed to keep people in medical treatment for the rest of their lives when underlying conditions for their fixation with “gender identity” isn’t ever considered because asking questions is considered transphobic.
How affirming a child who is bound to change their mind about things in the normal course of life to medically halt puberty and endanger their health is a scandal which will have many legal repercussions in future. The Keira Bell case is just one of many more to come.
Bonus!
What a surprise! The father of Queer Theory is a paedo! https://grahamlinehan.substack.com/p/...
In response to a comment by someone saying "I might read this book", I've added the following: Can't hurt. It's informative and if you have children or are yourself a young person, these are things you need to know to combat what is literally a cult. Have I mentioned Martine Rothblatt? "She" has a cult called transhumanism and wants to cure death. "She" was involved in the gene sequencing project. "She" is a dangerous individual with a Ted Talk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTJpJ...
August 13, 2020
This book is transphobic rubbish.
If you disagree, you're a dafty. And I don't care what you have to say.
If you disagree, you're a dafty. And I don't care what you have to say.
June 29, 2020
Great book.
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