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If You Tell: A True Story of Murder, Family Secrets, and the Unbreakable Bond of Sisterhood

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A True Story of Murder, Family Secrets, and the Unbreakable Bond of Sisterhood

After more than a decade, when sisters Nikki, Sami, and Tori Knotek hear the word mom, it claws like an eagle’s talons, triggering memories that have been their secret since childhood. Until now.

For years, behind the closed doors of their farmhouse in Raymond, Washington, their sadistic mother, Shelly, subjected her girls to unimaginable abuse, degradation, torture, and psychic terrors. Through it all, Nikki, Sami, and Tori developed a defiant bond that made them far less vulnerable than Shelly imagined. Even as others were drawn into their mother’s dark and perverse web, the sisters found the strength and courage to escape an escalating nightmare that culminated in multiple murders.

431 pages, Kindle Edition

First published December 1, 2019

About the author

Gregg Olsen

117 books6,199 followers
Throughout his career, Gregg Olsen has demonstrated an ability to create a detailed narrative that offers readers fascinating insights into the lives of people caught in extraordinary circumstances.

A #1 New York Times bestselling author, Olsen has written ten nonfiction books, ten novels, and contributed a short story to a collection edited by Lee Child.

The award-winning author has been a guest on dozens of national and local television shows, including educational programs for the History Channel, Learning Channel, and Discovery Channel. He has also appeared on Good Morning America, The Early Show, The Today Show, FOX News; CNN, Anderson Cooper 360, MSNBC, Entertainment Tonight, CBS 48 Hours, Oxygen’s Snapped, Court TV’s Crier Live, Inside Edition, Extra, Access Hollywood, and A&E’s Biography.

In addition to television and radio appearances, the award-winning author has been featured in Redbook, USA Today, People, Salon magazine, Seattle Times, Los Angeles Times and the New York Post.

The Deep Dark was named Idaho Book of the Year by the ILA and Starvation Heights was honored by Washington’s Secretary of State for the book’s contribution to Washington state history and culture.

Olsen, a Seattle native, lives in Olalla, Washington with his wife and Suri (a mini dachshund so spoiled she wears a sweater).

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5 stars
110,616 (37%)
4 stars
104,456 (35%)
3 stars
56,983 (19%)
2 stars
16,890 (5%)
1 star
7,847 (2%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 24,434 reviews
Profile Image for Dem.
1,236 reviews1,338 followers
January 29, 2020
2.5 Stars
Just to be clear I am not judging or rating this book on the horrific happenings or the cruelty that took place within this family and I cannot imagine what it would be like to grow up in a home with fear and violence part of every day life or with parents like the Knoteks. My rating reflects how the book came across to me as a reader who had never heard of this family or what took place within the household. We all react differently to books and this is just my reaction

This book came up as a bookclub January read and it may not have crossed my radar otherwise. I think it was poorly written and very repetitive. The account is quite disturbing and if there was a rating for how shocked I was at the level of abuse and torture that took place within this home, then I would rate it a 5. However I am not rating the book on it’s shockability factor. For me the story doesn't come across well and I wasn’t convinced I was getting the full picture of what actually happened. So many questions remained unanswered, how so many people on the outside of this family and in authority didn’t notice the disappearances or even what was going on with this family. The level of abuse and torture is relentless and makes for difficult reading. I did finish the book and am while I didn’t love it I do think it will make for good discussion.

I listened to this one on audible and the narrator was excellent.

An ok read and a story that may appeal to readers who enjoy true crime stories but not a book for my favourites shelf.
Profile Image for Debra.
2,866 reviews36k followers
January 1, 2020
This was a disturbing book. Sometimes things that really have happened are far worse than anything one can dream up in their mind. This is a tale of abuse, manipulation, and complete and utter disregard for human suffering. Where one woman got off on the emotional and physical pain she could inflict on others - mainly her children and those closest to her. How she got away with this for so long is a mystery.

“I loved my mother because I didn’t know I had a choice. I had to love her.”

What happens when the person who is supposed to love you the most, hurts you the most? The level of depravity and cruelty in this book is unsettling and hard to read at times. Shelly was nothing short of a monster. Be warned, there are many scenes which will be difficult for some to read. There are tales of horrific abuse.

This was a well written, well-researched account of abuse. The author did a great job telling these sister's stories and chronicled their lives together living with their mother and when they were adults

The light at the end of the tunnel, besides Shelly being brought to justice, was that the three sisters were able to move on, each in her own way. Each was able to make a life, love and be loved.

Thank you to Gregg Olson, Thomas & Mercer, and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions are my own.
Profile Image for Lisa.
334 reviews14 followers
November 12, 2019
A tragic story, but...

I found it difficult to engage with the story. I understand that the author has had to cobble together, many different points of view and try to create a coherent timeline for the story, but if found it clunky and sadly lacking in depth.

Don't get me wrong, this is a truly tragic and mind boggling account of terrible acts and my heart goes out to the victims. The strength and bond the sisters have retained is incredible. On the other hand, the terrible complicity and acts of the father seem to be minimised in comparison to Shelly's crimes.

This isn't an investigative account, more of a first draft that has the potential to fill in so many blanks. I for one would have liked more information to explain why the police didn't act on the information received the first time, Shelly was never even questioned?

The conclusion was pretty disappointing in so far as it left even more blanks. Nothing really was explained in any detail, they were arrested. She pled guilty but not guilty really? They went to jail. He gets out. Kids take him back into the fold, whilst Shelly is still in denial saying it's all a mistake. Phew?????

I stuck with this expecting more and sadly got less and less.
Profile Image for Forz Tutorik.
3 reviews409 followers
September 8, 2024
Reviewing a true crime story like this is a complex task, especially given the disturbing nature of what takes place within its pages. Listening to the Audiobook - "If You Tell" adds another dimension to that emotional weight, as the narrators bring the harrowing events to life with a raw, unsettling intensity. From the very beginning, you're confronted with the grim reality that the horrific acts described actually happened. That knowledge makes the experience all the more difficult to process, as you can’t help but wonder how something so heinous could go on for so long without anyone stepping in.

Much of the narrative is focused on the unimaginable cruelty Shelly inflicted on her children and "friends." The graphic details are hard to hear and often left me reeling, especially considering how oblivious the surrounding community seemed to be. This speaks volumes about human nature and the inclination to avoid getting involved in others' personal affairs, no matter how dark they might appear from the outside.

What really stood out in this book—and what made it so impactful—was its focus on the resilience of the three young girls who ultimately escaped Shelly's grip. Rather than delving into the usual police procedural or courtroom drama, this story shines a light on the survivors, their bravery in telling their stories, and the ways they coped with the horror they endured. Their voices, especially when heard through the audiobook, are powerful and deeply moving, providing a stark contrast to the bleakness of their circumstances.

This story is not one you can easily forget. It’s the kind of book that lingers long after you've finished, leaving you with a mix of emotions that are difficult to sort through. There were many times during the listen when I had to pause, take breaks, and practice some self-care because of the sheer emotional weight of the material. It’s a testament to the strength of the survivors that they were able to endure and rise above such trauma.

Audiobook version : "If You Tell" (Audiobook)

If you decide to listen to this audiobook, be prepared for a rollercoaster of emotions and a haunting narrative that will stick with you for a long time.
Profile Image for Dan McDonald.
38 reviews5 followers
November 12, 2019
Dark, Disturbing, Drawn Out, and Ultimately Dissatisfying

If you're going to write a book about a mentally ill, sadistic serial killer you should probably spend more time talking about her mental illness or at least trying to explain the "why" instead of just the "what." I never felt like I understood the motivations or motivating force behind any of the people in this tragedy. Was Shelly suffering from borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, both? What would the experts say? Was she just evil? An epilogue at the end that only gives superficial treatment to these issues and, particularly, the psychology behind why victims stay and don't report is extremely dissatisfying. Sorry. I just don't like reading about human misery without at least some ability to understand why or how it occurred. Giving the reader more tools to do that would have been appreciated.
Profile Image for Effie.
30 reviews10 followers
November 4, 2019
Poorly written. Poorly interpreted.

Yuck. Just yuck. The subject matter...the written word. I wanted to find out “what happened”. But it was a REAL struggle to read. So many ways this story could have been shortened. So much superfluous text. Just yuck.
Profile Image for Shainlock.
797 reviews
August 21, 2021
It took me no time at all to read this. Why? Well you hear about crimes and crazy things ppl do or split minute decisions made in haste, but I have never heard of someone like the mother in this story. She had a switch. She seemed to have a hair trigger. The book even remarked on that. It also well documents and shows you exactly what this means. Happy to horribly mean, calm to hellaciously evil and vengeful.

I’m not sure she had all of her humanity included when she was born? Or maybe in her formative years she did not get the type of nurturing care she needed when she was developing; during the most crucial parts of her personality development. Right when she would have been learning how to process emotions.

This was a great book, but in a terrible way. It was terrible in that this went on so long. It’s terrible that these things happened under the noses of others and that there were authority errors and non-response.
But I’m glad it finally came out for the sake of those that needed it to.
I can say I have heard of a lot of ppl with issues, but that woman seemed to be evil incarnate to me. I haven’t been before able to look at a picture of a stranger and see hatred so clearly. She needed lots of help.
I would recommend the book to true crime lovers that are strong and not triggered often. This is definitely a very disturbing piece of material that has been well organized and written by Olsen. It’s not my first by him, and I enjoy his research.
Profile Image for Joey R..
322 reviews614 followers
March 18, 2021
3.5 stars— I have always enjoyed Greg Olsen’s true crime books. Olsen is one of the most thorough researchers there is, and this book is no exception. However, the story of Shelly Knotek is not an easy one to read. Ms. Knotek qualifies as one of the most evil persons ever to live. Her lack of compassion and sadistic behavior over her entire life is like nothing I have ever seen before. Since Knotek’s three daughters as well as statements given by Knotek’s husband are the sources of information for the book, I believe the book is accurate. But to say reading about such an evil person who takes such pleasure in her lifetime behavior of inflicting misery on innocent victims is exhausting is an understatement. Although I was interested in the surviving victims’ stories and amazed at the ability of Shelly to manipulate others, don’t pick up this book believing you are going to feel good while you are reading it. In fact the more I read the more depressed I became. I hate to think that people like Ms. Knotek —who never showed any remorse for her behavior— exist. But at least the daughters who survived the horrific abuse became closer and probably more loving to others after witnessing such tyrannical behavior from the person who should have loved them the most.
Profile Image for Grace.
33 reviews1 follower
November 2, 2019
I’m pretty horrified that Shelly was allowed to get away with so much. Horrified.
August 28, 2022
What makes this book all the more disturbing is that is it based on a true story. A very troubling story of a mothers treatment of her own children.

This true crime novel is relentless in its story telling of torture, violent episodes, extreme abuse, death, broken relationships and family tragedy. However, it DID happen in one family. To the children and a family friend.

Unfortunately I struggled to see the purpose of this book because so many questions went unanswered like why? And what happened to the children afterwards? How did this affect their lives?. As such, although it was well written and honest, it also felt unfinished particularly as we were rooting for the children in their lives without mother.

For me personally this felt like a chronology of horrifying events, without the impact and healing from abuse and domestic violence which is so important to address.

Although the children have had the courage to come forward eventually. We want to hear more about how they have rebuilt their lives.
Profile Image for angela .
785 reviews158 followers
August 8, 2020
This was an intense book about mental, physical abuse and murder. A mother and wife who was a psychopathic, narcissistic, abusive, manipulating, murder. She tortured her children, manipulated everyone and should have been on death row, for what she did. It was sometimes hard to listen, awkward hearing what she would do her children and people who came to live with them. It was an excellent book, that brings to light, how crazy some people are. How lucky I am to have the family I do. I don’t know how anyone can do these things to anyone, never mind their own family. I’m in shock right now, I don’t know what to say.

How these people kept it together and dealt with what was going on, is crazy, but I can see how it can happen, kinda. Everyone had no where else to go, or turn. If they said anything and weren’t believed, their lives would be in danger. It’s a hard situation.

It was definitely well written, I believe it was based on a true story. I’m not sure though, I was going back and forth between two books, I know one was based on a true story. The Author did a wonderful job of describing everything, giving a mental picture of what was happening. The story was smooth. and engrossing. The characters all distinct personalities and they all dealt similarly, yet different. As much as this affected me, my feeling is when an Author can get you feeling real emotions and develop a true connection, or (concern in this case), they have done a GREAT job. My emotions were runithing over!! Great book.
Profile Image for Lauren Morse.
188 reviews26 followers
November 7, 2019
Wow this was....terrible. I mean, the story is obviously terrible, and would be no matter what, but couple that with the awful writing, lack of editing, repetitive phrasing, and cutesy metaphors and puns - and you get this dumpster fire.
Profile Image for Misty Marie Harms.
559 reviews633 followers
January 5, 2022
Wow this book blew me away. I wanted to jump in the book and rescue Nikki, Sami, and Tori Knotek. There was times I had tears in my eyes. I felt their pain so deeply. I don't know how they survived with their sanity. Shelly Knotek and her husband are human garbage. The things they did to those children are horrifying. Then they tortured and killed 2 innocent people under the guise of friendship. I was so proud of Nikki for finally standing up and going to the police. I wish the sisters all the best and I hope they are happy.
Profile Image for Aden.
383 reviews46 followers
May 24, 2020
This is the first time i’ve ever given a book 1 star. I usually say you shouldn’t rate a book you haven’t finished but after 275 pages of this book i’ll give it one star. This is a true story of abuse that shelly knotek inflicted on her children and those around her. While i feel and hurt so badly for the three children, nikki, sammi, and tori, their cousin shane, and the people who lost their lives, especially kathy because she endured so much abuse to try to protect the children from their abuser, there are still so many things that bothered me.

Shellys husband dave.
The writing of this book makes this man seem like a big victim when in reality he is just as, if not more in some situations, accountable for the abuse and deaths caused at his and his wife’s hands. It’s absolutely disgusting how many excuses for his actions are subtly written into the story.

The writing itself.
I enjoyed the writing at first but you will very soon find out how boring and repetitive it is. For almost 300 pages i read it was the same material. It actually desensitizes the abuse that the girls went through and almost feels like their abuse is being milked for content for the book.

After some research, I’m so glad that the girls are doing better. Although they will live will the trauma that their disgusting mother and imbecile father inflicted, it makes me happy that their bond hasn’t been shattered and they grow and strengthen together.

But this books is not good and anyone who is interested in this story should skip out on this and watch and read the articles and videos that have been posted on this. A lot of them actually show true sympathy for the children and other victims and put emphasis on the abusers and the long lasting trauma they will cause.
June 6, 2020
Q: The best calls came at three in the morning. (c)

Q: Even on the crazy train, there is a place where the world is shut out and things go on feeling as though they are normal or even worth fighting for. (c) The world's most fucked up train with Shelly Knotek as the lead conductor.

This is I dunno what. If at least some of this is true then this is a bonkers batshit story. And it does seem to be credible.

I have no idea how that gal managed to get off with this much military grade crap. What the hell was the deal of the other people? Just how many deeply traumatized people are walking around ready to fall victims to some batsy person?

Q:
“She doesn’t know how to talk without some stupid lie coming out of her mouth.” (c)
Q:
After that, her underwear vanished. Kathy did chores around the house nude. (c)
Q:
Shelly never let the children use the toilet without permission or without the door fully open. Most times, Shelly perched next to the kids as they went about their business and watched like it was a science experiment. (c)
Q:
Lara Watson thought her son-in-law had a serious drinking problem, but it paled next to his Shelly problem. Drinking, he could quit. Shelly, it turned out, not so easily. (c)
Q:
... not rocking the boat didn’t stop bad things from happening. It only allowed them to continue. (c)

Aand here goes the answer:
Q:
(c)
Profile Image for Margaret Jones.
29 reviews3 followers
November 4, 2019
Talk about dysfunctional families!

Unbelievably sadistic, psychopathic mother. Weak, submissive husband. Three abused daughters. Three tortured, murdered "boarders". Another true crime horror story by Gregg Olsen. He's not the best writer. Repetitive and illogical reiteration of a cult-like group of inadequate, two dimensional characters who never come alive on the page. Disappointing.
Profile Image for Jade Violet.
328 reviews493 followers
January 29, 2020
I'm going to need a minute on this one. Feel like I have to go take a shower first and bleach my mind before I say anything... Oh, that was a bad choice of words considering.
Profile Image for Johann (jobis89).
729 reviews4,485 followers
February 25, 2021
Horrifying case, but poorly written and lacking... something!! Full review to come.
Profile Image for CarolG.
807 reviews388 followers
February 18, 2020
As if I don't have enough books on my lists, I opted for a trial Kindle Unlimited membership so that I could read some short novels my brother has written. I was surprised and slightly delighted to learn that it's not necessary to own a Kindle and that I'm able to read them on my laptop. What are the chances I'll cancel my subscription when the 30 days are up?! Anyway, other than my brother's books, this was the first book I chose to read in this fashion. For some reason the local library doesn't seem to carry many of Gregg Olsen's books so I added a couple of them to my Kindle Unlimited Books. I think I have a problem! Personally, I think I still prefer a physical book but I'd read additional books this way, especially when the local library doesn't carry certain books.

As far as the book itself, this is a horrific story and I had a hard time believing it was based on reality. I know terrible things happen in the real world but it's just so hard to believe that there were so many people who knew or suspected what was happening and did nothing to stop it. Well written and presented in a format that's easy to follow. Reading the responses to a reader's question about the book was also a real eye-opener. Like people say, you couldn't make this stuff up. This book wouldn't be for everyone as descriptions of abuse are quite graphic but I'd recommend it to anyone who is fascinated by the extremes some people go to.
Profile Image for Valerity (Val).
1,030 reviews2,760 followers
December 26, 2019
This is a crazy good book by Gregg Olsen about a really dysfunctional family that becomes painful at times to read. The more you read, the more you see it going off in the ditch. You can’t help but watch the train wreck though. The main twistee, Shelly, is a real piece of work. She loves to inflict maximum punishment and humiliation on her victims, who are her own three children, along with a young male nephew she’s taken in, along with her former hairdresser Kathy, who moved in to help out at a time she needed a place to stay.

This is the best of true crime, and it’s hard to put down, wanting to see what’s going to happen next. I really enjoy this author's non-fiction work, following him for many years.

First published on my WordPress blog, viewable here:
https://wordpress.com/post/bookblog20...
358 reviews
November 3, 2019
Why? How? How could she have done all those things?

From the moment I started reading this book I was hooked. I kept asking, why did the police not react sooner? They are to blame for Ron’s death, no question. But most importantly, How terrible these girls had to endure all those years of torture. However, there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel, and in this story it tells of three sisters who found the courage to finally tell the truth. Three strong women who are survivors. Thank you to the author for telling this story. May no one ever forget the horrible atrocities committed by “Shelley”. Heart wrenching story!
Profile Image for Debbie "Buried in Her TBR Pile".
1,902 reviews276 followers
October 24, 2020
3 stars

51 reviews2 followers
December 3, 2019
Wow. Such juvenile writing, I'm stunned. I seriously wish I hadn't started (free 'First Read' Amazon offering), or finished it, but I have this OCD thing about finishing books. Yes, it's a shocking story, evil woman, evil man, incompetent police, yada, yada, yada. Poorly written. Repetitive, excuse making, etc. Seriously cannot recommend, and I will not read any other books written by Mr. Olsen. I'm thinking I may be able to make a living as a 'writer' if this is the bar.
Profile Image for Laura.
780 reviews191 followers
July 15, 2024
My sister-in-law recommended this book. Wow was it deeply disturbing but a lesson for anyone reading it in coercive control by a sociopath. It's also a study in coping, survival and resilience.
Profile Image for Laura Lovesreading.
342 reviews1,341 followers
Read
September 2, 2024
HOW CAN ONE BE SO DAMN EVIL?

If You Tell is a true story about the lives of sisters Nikki, Sami, and Tori Knotek and what they endured behind closed doors with their psychotic of a mother Shelley. What you will read will emotionally scar you and have you revolting in disgust. It is not an easy read at all and I am making it very clear now that checking trigger warning are a must before you give this a try.

The book comprises of seven parts and it was the end of part one when I realized that this story sounded very familiar and I remembered that I had listened to a true crime podcast of this horrific story a couple years ago. Even though I remembered the story it didn’t stop me from continuing with reading this book as this book is different because we hear the thoughts and feelings from the sisters themselves.

I had goosebumps reading this and felt cold tying to digest how a mother can be so evil and manipulative. I knew the story, but I still couldn’t put the book down. The author did an amazing job keeping you engaged even though you will be squirming and feeling outraged and disgusted throughout. My heart agonized for the girls and a few other victims in the book. I don’t understand how everything that happened with the Knotek family had gone unnoticed for so long but frankly it pissed me all the way off.

PART 1- The introduction to Shelley and her personality/ behaviour
PART 2- The introduction of Shelley’s daughters Nikki and Sami and the beginning of the abuse
PART 3- Shelley best friend and nephew story after moving in with the Knotek family
PART 4- More of an insight in Shelley husband Dave and his thoughts (I HATE THAT PLEB)
PART 5- Shelley’s friend Ron moves in and the treatment of him is highlighted
PART 6- Aftermath of the sisters all grown up and how they navigate life with heightened trauma
PART 7- Consequences

With this book being a true story I just don’t feel comfortable rating it as I feel like I’m rating the victims real life horror story. Objectively though this would be rated a 5 star read.




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⋆。°✩pre read⋆。°✩
I have not read a Non Fiction in the longest time
I’ve been told this will absolutely destroy me
So nervous for this read 🥺🤍❤️
Profile Image for Cheryl James.
327 reviews225 followers
January 7, 2020
This is a 5 star book of craziness and sadness. I could not believe that this mother, wife, aunt, and friend was able to manipulate, torture, harass and kill people in this day and time. I pray that this story goes viral. Children and Adults need to know that there is help to get them out of a horrible situation. People like this mother and father should rot in jail with no chance of getting out. How do they sleep at night? Kudos to the 3 sisters for standing up and disclosing the truth about their parents. May they continue to flourish in life❣
Profile Image for Ashley.
7 reviews2 followers
May 1, 2020
this book is an absolute slog to get through. the writing is so flat and repetitive. it reads like one really long newspaper article that you can’t wait to be done with. do yourself a favor and read anything else.
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