What do you think?
Rate this book
Black Girls Must Die Exhausted #1
Black Girls Must Die Exhausted
"Black girls must die exhausted" is something that 33-year-old Tabitha Walker has heard her grandmother say before. Of course, her grandmother (who happens to be white) was referring to the 1950's and what she observed in the nascent times of civil rights. With a coveted position as a local news reporter, Marc-- a "paper-perfect" boyfriend, and a standing Saturday morning appointment with a reliable hairstylist, Tabitha never imagined how this phrase could apply to her as a black girl in contemporary times - until everything changed.
An unexpected doctor's diagnosis awakens Tabitha to an unperceived culprit, threatening the one thing that has always mattered most - having a family of her own. With the help of her best friends, the irreverent and headstrong Laila and Alexis, the former "Sexy Lexi," Tabitha must explore the reaches of modern medicine and test the limits of her relationships to beat the ticking clock on her dreams of becoming a wife and mother.
She must leverage the power of laughter, love, and courageous self-care to bring a healing stronger than she ever imagined - before the phrase "black girls must die exhausted" takes on a new and unwanted meaning in her own life.
An unexpected doctor's diagnosis awakens Tabitha to an unperceived culprit, threatening the one thing that has always mattered most - having a family of her own. With the help of her best friends, the irreverent and headstrong Laila and Alexis, the former "Sexy Lexi," Tabitha must explore the reaches of modern medicine and test the limits of her relationships to beat the ticking clock on her dreams of becoming a wife and mother.
She must leverage the power of laughter, love, and courageous self-care to bring a healing stronger than she ever imagined - before the phrase "black girls must die exhausted" takes on a new and unwanted meaning in her own life.
402 pages, ebook
First published September 6, 2018
About the author
Jayne Allen
7 books1,510 followersInstagram: @JayneAllenWrites
Publisher Instagram: @HarperPerennial
Publisher Twitter: @HarperPerennial
Jayne Allen is a black girl from Detroit who smiles widely, laughs loudly and loves to tell stories that stick to your bones. Her debut novel, "Black Girls Must Die Exhausted," which Kirkus Reviews called "both timely and enjoyable," touches upon contemporary women's issues such as workplace womanhood, race, fertility, modern relationships and mental health awareness, echoing her desire to bring both multiculturalism and multidimensionality to contemporary women's fiction with dynamic female protagonists who also happen to be black. When she's not writing "chocolate chick lit with a conscience," she's spending time with her girlfriends, keeping one ear open for her next saucy tale.
Publisher Instagram: @HarperPerennial
Publisher Twitter: @HarperPerennial
Jayne Allen is a black girl from Detroit who smiles widely, laughs loudly and loves to tell stories that stick to your bones. Her debut novel, "Black Girls Must Die Exhausted," which Kirkus Reviews called "both timely and enjoyable," touches upon contemporary women's issues such as workplace womanhood, race, fertility, modern relationships and mental health awareness, echoing her desire to bring both multiculturalism and multidimensionality to contemporary women's fiction with dynamic female protagonists who also happen to be black. When she's not writing "chocolate chick lit with a conscience," she's spending time with her girlfriends, keeping one ear open for her next saucy tale.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,165 reviews
September 7, 2020
I wanted to love this book so much because the title was so intriguing, but I was sorely disappointed in the plot, the writing and the ending. The book felt extremely rushed and there were so many filler words (and chapters) that I felt like it was dragging along and I actually felt myself trying to hurry up and get it over with. With respect to the characters, I could not relate to any of them except one peripheral character, her grandmother's friend. The other characters were very much built on cliche's (young black man can't commit, cheating black man husband, blowing off the "good guy," mother pressures daughter for a grandchild, etc.). The main character seems to be based on Being Mary Jane's main character played by Gabrielle Union and while likeable seemed extremely shallow, self-centered and lacking in depth. Her life was pretty much her constantly going to the hair salon, going to happy hour, meeting up with her rich family, being an absent friend, and having pretty much no real struggles except not having a boyfriend/ husband and trying to get promoted at work. I must admit, I do not know the plight of a bi-racial woman, so maybe that was one of her struggles, but she did not touch on that point enough for me to consider it a hindrance in her life. I will say that I don't think this book even scratches the surface of the plight of black women and, thus, is not really deserving of its title.
November 17, 2022
mixed feelings. i appreciated that this was a slice of life story with a Black female main character that hit on some hard topics while remaining tonally light. but i didn't totally understand the message/genre here. it wasn't a romance and i guess Tabby did have some personal growth throughout the story but it didn't feel like a complete character arc. and at the same time i can't imagine how to stretch out this story into a duet or trilogy (i know there is for sure already a second book).
pleasant audiobook experience but i'm not sure i'll pick up the next book. Tabby deserves MUCH better and i dunno if i wanna see her put up with her ex's bullshit again.
pleasant audiobook experience but i'm not sure i'll pick up the next book. Tabby deserves MUCH better and i dunno if i wanna see her put up with her ex's bullshit again.
June 18, 2022
if you’re a white millennial woman who met a black person for the first time yesterday ok maybe this book would be fine for you but you still may be bored 🤷🏾♀️ felt as deep as a kiddie pool
March 18, 2022
Slice of life stories don’t always work for me, but I really really enjoyed this book! The writing is fantastic and I absolutely loved the characters. Tabby is our protagonist and she’s feeling the pressure to get married and have kids now that she’s thirty-three. She also works as a TV news reporter, which is soooooo cool and I’d love to read more books about this career because I find it absolutely fascinating. But I’m so glad to hear this will be the first book in a series because I love this authors writing! I just immediately connected to the story and I felt so much for Tabby and everything she was going through. I appreciate all the discussion about race in this book too, and the talk about the unique struggles Black women face in society today, and I thought it was all very well done. I loved the discussions Tabby had with her grandmother in this book, she’s such a wise woman and a really great character and I adore their relationship. I can’t wait to read more from this author in the future!
November 15, 2021
Loved the title and the cover art.
Early on in the book we are presented with Tabitha's dilemma; her doctor says she is going to have difficulty getting pregnant, as a 33 year old person who wants to have a family specifically by carrying a pregnancy to term this is a hard hit.
However (spoilers ahead) we very quickly after see Tabitha presented with a situation where she takes consent away from her boyfriend who has been upfront with her about his desire for no children. She has recently changed her mind on when she wants children and he has not. So the scene where she decides not to tell him about not taking her birth control pills and then for a few days at least, thinks she may be pregnant was so untoward.
We really just breezed past that, but it was so cringeworthy I don't think I ever fully moved past it.
Overall Jayne Allen has presented us with a complicated ensemble of characters that I was invested in. I grieved with Tabitha when her grandmother passed away, and when her friend ended up in the hospital.
I understand the premise was perhaps to show how much black women go through, but it still felt like we covered too many things.
- Being promoted because of race
- Infertility
-Noncommittal (black) men
-Absent (black) father
-Unfaithful (black) husband
-Shooting of an unarmed boy by police
-Woman being involved in an affair
-Depression that is not disclosed
-Suicide attempt
-Death of a grandparent
Especially because of the stereotypes that go with the above topics, it felt like the author didn't do enough (or anything) to dispel the validity of these images of the black community, and honestly the person she fought the hardest for were honest cops.
And the title line "Black girls must die exhausted" was recited by the white grandmother.
There were moments though when the lines of the story read beautifully, but it didn't fully redeem it for me. I am currently on the fence about reading the second book in this trilogy.
Early on in the book we are presented with Tabitha's dilemma; her doctor says she is going to have difficulty getting pregnant, as a 33 year old person who wants to have a family specifically by carrying a pregnancy to term this is a hard hit.
However (spoilers ahead) we very quickly after see Tabitha presented with a situation where she takes consent away from her boyfriend who has been upfront with her about his desire for no children. She has recently changed her mind on when she wants children and he has not. So the scene where she decides not to tell him about not taking her birth control pills and then for a few days at least, thinks she may be pregnant was so untoward.
We really just breezed past that, but it was so cringeworthy I don't think I ever fully moved past it.
Overall Jayne Allen has presented us with a complicated ensemble of characters that I was invested in. I grieved with Tabitha when her grandmother passed away, and when her friend ended up in the hospital.
I understand the premise was perhaps to show how much black women go through, but it still felt like we covered too many things.
- Being promoted because of race
- Infertility
-Noncommittal (black) men
-Absent (black) father
-Unfaithful (black) husband
-Shooting of an unarmed boy by police
-Woman being involved in an affair
-Depression that is not disclosed
-Suicide attempt
-Death of a grandparent
Especially because of the stereotypes that go with the above topics, it felt like the author didn't do enough (or anything) to dispel the validity of these images of the black community, and honestly the person she fought the hardest for were honest cops.
And the title line "Black girls must die exhausted" was recited by the white grandmother.
There were moments though when the lines of the story read beautifully, but it didn't fully redeem it for me. I am currently on the fence about reading the second book in this trilogy.
November 23, 2018
The following review first appeared on Sunday 11/18/2018:
http://blerdybingereader.blogspot.com...
There is a substantive distinction between BLACK fiction and fiction written about characters who happen to be black, among other traits, that’s difficult to quantify. Black Girls Must Die Exhausted, the first entry in a scheduled trilogy, falls into the latter category. It is integrated in ways that mainstream contemporary fiction rarely is beyond ethnicity, including socioeconomic class, geographic region, age, and gender.
Blend a 21st-century New Adult version of Waiting to Exhale and “Girlfriends” with candid revelations about traumatic injuries of the spirit reminiscent of For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide/When the Rainbow is Enuf. Toss in the caustic wisdom of seasoned women a la “Golden Girls” or “Grace and Frankie” into a sometimes exclamatory narrative style familiar to fans of Sophie Kinsella to create this endearing tale that’s provocative, funny, and emotionally satisfying.
Of its many thematic layers about 33-year-old Tabitha’s professional and personal struggles, Black Girls Must Die Exhausted portrays the challenges of women to maintain their integrity of self and exert agency from multiple angles: career opportunities, proactive medical and mental health advocacy, family obligations, and romantic relationships.
Tabitha’s, Alexis’s, and Laila’s complicated man troubles each qualify for their own “Ask Steve Harvey” segment. Tabitha broods about single, thirty-something men’s attitudes toward monogamy on page 10:
They treated love like a disease you catch, and if real adult commitment was the incurable version of it, then for them family was basically death.
The ensuing relationship drama practically screams validation of Dr. Maya Angelou’s quote about believing people the first time they reveal who they really are.
Inclusive representation is also addressed from multiple points of view. Seeds for a less fraught variation of themes from The Hate U Give are planted on page 27 when Tabitha thinks, “Communities that were underrepresented in the newsroom were underrepresented in the news.” The words newsroom and news are easily substituted for words like innovators and innovations or executive suites and workplaces.
Tabitha’s rude awakening regarding her fertility options resonates as a timely call for proactive self-advocacy consistent with revelations shared by former first lady Michelle Obama in Becoming, the #startasking campaign started by 2018 Mrs. North Carolina, and the series by Nicole Ellis for The Washington Post.
The level of reading enjoyment provided by Black Girls Must Die Exhausted bodes well for the release of And Baby Makes Two in September 2019.
[Proofing note: In the NetGalley ARC offsetting commas for directly addressing a person by name are frequently missing as on page 48, “Hi Nate,” and throughout the text, a pattern that was probably corrected in the final galley.]
http://blerdybingereader.blogspot.com...
There is a substantive distinction between BLACK fiction and fiction written about characters who happen to be black, among other traits, that’s difficult to quantify. Black Girls Must Die Exhausted, the first entry in a scheduled trilogy, falls into the latter category. It is integrated in ways that mainstream contemporary fiction rarely is beyond ethnicity, including socioeconomic class, geographic region, age, and gender.
Blend a 21st-century New Adult version of Waiting to Exhale and “Girlfriends” with candid revelations about traumatic injuries of the spirit reminiscent of For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide/When the Rainbow is Enuf. Toss in the caustic wisdom of seasoned women a la “Golden Girls” or “Grace and Frankie” into a sometimes exclamatory narrative style familiar to fans of Sophie Kinsella to create this endearing tale that’s provocative, funny, and emotionally satisfying.
Of its many thematic layers about 33-year-old Tabitha’s professional and personal struggles, Black Girls Must Die Exhausted portrays the challenges of women to maintain their integrity of self and exert agency from multiple angles: career opportunities, proactive medical and mental health advocacy, family obligations, and romantic relationships.
Tabitha’s, Alexis’s, and Laila’s complicated man troubles each qualify for their own “Ask Steve Harvey” segment. Tabitha broods about single, thirty-something men’s attitudes toward monogamy on page 10:
They treated love like a disease you catch, and if real adult commitment was the incurable version of it, then for them family was basically death.
The ensuing relationship drama practically screams validation of Dr. Maya Angelou’s quote about believing people the first time they reveal who they really are.
Inclusive representation is also addressed from multiple points of view. Seeds for a less fraught variation of themes from The Hate U Give are planted on page 27 when Tabitha thinks, “Communities that were underrepresented in the newsroom were underrepresented in the news.” The words newsroom and news are easily substituted for words like innovators and innovations or executive suites and workplaces.
Tabitha’s rude awakening regarding her fertility options resonates as a timely call for proactive self-advocacy consistent with revelations shared by former first lady Michelle Obama in Becoming, the #startasking campaign started by 2018 Mrs. North Carolina, and the series by Nicole Ellis for The Washington Post.
The level of reading enjoyment provided by Black Girls Must Die Exhausted bodes well for the release of And Baby Makes Two in September 2019.
[Proofing note: In the NetGalley ARC offsetting commas for directly addressing a person by name are frequently missing as on page 48, “Hi Nate,” and throughout the text, a pattern that was probably corrected in the final galley.]
February 26, 2022
Yikes, I really wanted to like this book. The cover is gorgeous, the reviews are pretty good. But I hated this. The storyline was weak. Our main character Tabitha does four things throughout the novel:
-get her hair done
-hang out with her girlfriends
-visit her white grandma
-beg her on again/off again boyfriend to marry her and get her pregnant
Tabitha and her friends were supposed to be in their 30's but talked and acted like they were teenagers. Tabitha whined and complained to her parents, cried all the time, stammered her way through important conversations with her man. It was so frustrating. I think I'm done with these "romance" novels about women in their 30's distressed they don't have a husband and kids. It feels so old fashioned. So boring.
And the writing. So many ellipses. Each character said the name of the person were talking to in every sentence. When the girlfriends got together their conversations were a little too "yaaaass queen", "you go girl!" to be believable.
Really disappointing.
-get her hair done
-hang out with her girlfriends
-visit her white grandma
-beg her on again/off again boyfriend to marry her and get her pregnant
Tabitha and her friends were supposed to be in their 30's but talked and acted like they were teenagers. Tabitha whined and complained to her parents, cried all the time, stammered her way through important conversations with her man. It was so frustrating. I think I'm done with these "romance" novels about women in their 30's distressed they don't have a husband and kids. It feels so old fashioned. So boring.
And the writing. So many ellipses. Each character said the name of the person were talking to in every sentence. When the girlfriends got together their conversations were a little too "yaaaass queen", "you go girl!" to be believable.
Really disappointing.
September 11, 2018
I love a book with strong female characters. I love reading about women at their best, supporting each other emotionally, financially, psychologically and culturally and this book just served me a whole series of “Girlfriends!”
Tabitha is career focused. She’s got her sights set on being a Senior Reporter, but there’s also Marc, he’s educated, intelligent, sexy- but for one a half years they have been dating and when she gets a verdict from the doctor, she starts evaluating her life, priorities and relationships based on that.
I loved her friendship with her girlfriends, Laila and Alexis. They each have their own battles and are as bold as they come. I could use a Laila in my life, especially when she tells Tabby:
“Do you want me to go key his car?..Because I will- just say the word and I will light that Porsche right up!”
The author’s tone of writing is simple and each character’s voice is undeniably strong. You cannot help but also appreciate the diversity of women from age, race to social status and they all influence Tabby in one way or the other. I found her relationship with her grandmother most interesting and there’s this point where in relation to the title of the book, Gretchen, her grandmother’s friend tells her “I say, don’t ever die of exhaustion on somebody else’s terms!”
I could sing praises of this book all day long, because it I could relate to it. I see myself in Tabby, Laila, Alexis, her mother, grandmother and I see myself in her career struggles, however the ending was not a reader’s paradise. I know there’s a second book, but come on…why exhaust my emotions over this?
I got to read this book courtesy of the Publisher and Netgalley and that eARC was so worth it! How else would I have felt so drawn to a character like this?
Tabitha is career focused. She’s got her sights set on being a Senior Reporter, but there’s also Marc, he’s educated, intelligent, sexy- but for one a half years they have been dating and when she gets a verdict from the doctor, she starts evaluating her life, priorities and relationships based on that.
I loved her friendship with her girlfriends, Laila and Alexis. They each have their own battles and are as bold as they come. I could use a Laila in my life, especially when she tells Tabby:
“Do you want me to go key his car?..Because I will- just say the word and I will light that Porsche right up!”
The author’s tone of writing is simple and each character’s voice is undeniably strong. You cannot help but also appreciate the diversity of women from age, race to social status and they all influence Tabby in one way or the other. I found her relationship with her grandmother most interesting and there’s this point where in relation to the title of the book, Gretchen, her grandmother’s friend tells her “I say, don’t ever die of exhaustion on somebody else’s terms!”
I could sing praises of this book all day long, because it I could relate to it. I see myself in Tabby, Laila, Alexis, her mother, grandmother and I see myself in her career struggles, however the ending was not a reader’s paradise. I know there’s a second book, but come on…why exhaust my emotions over this?
I got to read this book courtesy of the Publisher and Netgalley and that eARC was so worth it! How else would I have felt so drawn to a character like this?
January 18, 2019
This book, about a young woman pursuing a balance between career, family, and fertility (with a ticking clock) had a real Gabrielle Union movie circa late 90’s/early 2000’s vibe. That was who I pictured as the narrator. This isn’t my usual genre, and I think I read this expecting something a bit different or a bit more. Despite being well written it followed a predictable and normative narrative. Three girlfriends were not actually that nice to each other, and there was a lot of snark about bigger bodies. This was not the type of book where the shortcomings of the narrator were about creating a true character (good writing often means unlikeable or imperfect people)- Tabby was definitely supposed to be a relatable and aspirational character - so maybe she could have been a bit less judgemental and superficial at times? There was some pretty heavy moralizing happening around infidelity, jealousy, family dysfunction, etc. I think that characters fell into tropes more than they became individuals to me. The saving grace for me was that, despite the length of time that was spent with drinking and pining and going in circles (this book was long, too long!!), things were able to remain unresolved and a bit messy at the end that indicated some growth. I would probably go see this in the theatres were it a movie, and I would probably roll my eyes a few times at the rigidity of it’s vision for Black womanhood. Thanks @netgalley for the ARC, opinions are my own.
February 26, 2022
I don’t even know where to begin
March 13, 2022
This book disappointed me for a lot of reasons. I could go into heavy detail, and I will, I will go into heavy detail.
Tabitha is just about the most annoying main character ever. It’s unclear what her driving motivations are. I wish the author interrogated the concept of women feeling “incomplete” or “failures” for not having the picture perfect house, partner and kids by a certain age. Maybe as a QWOC I’m a bit removed from this hetero experience to empathize, but the fertility piece of this novel felt a bit archaic in nature.
We’re meant to understand that Black women have to do twice as much to get half as far, in friendships,
within family dynamics, career, romantic interests and so on and forth. As a Black woman, I felt exhausted by this novel, it didn’t teach me anything new about Blackness that I haven’t already experienced for myself. Which begs the question… who was this book really written for?
I’ve noticed a trend in contemporary novels written by Black authors - many contribute very little to race discourse, are wholly unoriginal, and except to maybe a non-Black reader illuminate nothing groundbreaking about the Black experience.
Allen set out to do A LOT here and failed to accomplish what so many other contemporary Black novelists have done & done better, Brit Bennett, Bryan Washington, Mateo Askaripour & Yaa Gyasi, to name a few.
I want to read more books about Black PEOPLE not BlackNESS.
Tabitha is just about the most annoying main character ever. It’s unclear what her driving motivations are. I wish the author interrogated the concept of women feeling “incomplete” or “failures” for not having the picture perfect house, partner and kids by a certain age. Maybe as a QWOC I’m a bit removed from this hetero experience to empathize, but the fertility piece of this novel felt a bit archaic in nature.
We’re meant to understand that Black women have to do twice as much to get half as far, in friendships,
within family dynamics, career, romantic interests and so on and forth. As a Black woman, I felt exhausted by this novel, it didn’t teach me anything new about Blackness that I haven’t already experienced for myself. Which begs the question… who was this book really written for?
I’ve noticed a trend in contemporary novels written by Black authors - many contribute very little to race discourse, are wholly unoriginal, and except to maybe a non-Black reader illuminate nothing groundbreaking about the Black experience.
Allen set out to do A LOT here and failed to accomplish what so many other contemporary Black novelists have done & done better, Brit Bennett, Bryan Washington, Mateo Askaripour & Yaa Gyasi, to name a few.
I want to read more books about Black PEOPLE not BlackNESS.
June 21, 2019
The review is here. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️. This book started off firmly in the chick lit genre and along the way an adultish novel broke out bringing to life all that’s good about great fiction. Emotion, characters with depth, real life situations that are relatable and empathy inducing. Tabitha Walker is a TV news reporter and is trying to rise through the ranks in that setting, she is also thinking about having children but a hurdle has been discovered. In addition, her current boyfriend is undecided on children and really his future with Tabitha.
So, navigating through all this can at times be absolutely exhausting, but Tabitha manages well through it all, and that’s a testament to the brilliant writing of Jayne Allen. As the book moves more into the adultish realm, we get gems of real life advice like this from Tabitha‘s grandmother,
“‘Two,” she said, following a deep breath, ‘I just learned that life, no matter what kinda bad happens…it’s all about finding some bit of optimism, some kind of hope that the next moment, or even the moment after that…’Granny Tab looked away as her eyes glazed wistfully in the direction of the willow tree, before she continued, ‘is going to be all that you had originally wished for, and that your good is still on the way.’”
Tabitha becomes a character that is easy to root for and become emotionally invested in, to the point of really caring and hoping that things would work out for her. I had to check myself a time or two to remember we are talking about fictional characters, not real people. Overall, just very impressed with this book and the way it delivered emotion, authenticity and timely advice and wisdom. A book two is on the way and I’m certainly going to read that one! Book is available now and thanks to Netgalley, Quality Black Books and Jayne Allen for an advanced DRC.
So, navigating through all this can at times be absolutely exhausting, but Tabitha manages well through it all, and that’s a testament to the brilliant writing of Jayne Allen. As the book moves more into the adultish realm, we get gems of real life advice like this from Tabitha‘s grandmother,
“‘Two,” she said, following a deep breath, ‘I just learned that life, no matter what kinda bad happens…it’s all about finding some bit of optimism, some kind of hope that the next moment, or even the moment after that…’Granny Tab looked away as her eyes glazed wistfully in the direction of the willow tree, before she continued, ‘is going to be all that you had originally wished for, and that your good is still on the way.’”
Tabitha becomes a character that is easy to root for and become emotionally invested in, to the point of really caring and hoping that things would work out for her. I had to check myself a time or two to remember we are talking about fictional characters, not real people. Overall, just very impressed with this book and the way it delivered emotion, authenticity and timely advice and wisdom. A book two is on the way and I’m certainly going to read that one! Book is available now and thanks to Netgalley, Quality Black Books and Jayne Allen for an advanced DRC.
March 9, 2022
4.25-4.5 ⭐️
“Black girls, they sure must die exhausted. So many battles to fight, through segregation, Jim Crow, which I saw firsthand, up through Civil Rights, and today, even. I know it must feel like a lot..”
I loved this book, and the message behind it. I loved Granny Tab, Ms. Gretchen, and Tabitha’s girl group, although quite dysfunctional—Laila & Alexis. I felt like I was watching an episode of The Game. Probably because I’m binging it at the moment, but the relationship between the three women supporting each other and being there for each other was similar. The characters in this story their voices are strong and fierce. I love the conversations that can be had through this story about race, social class, relationships, career choices and also infertility.
I honestly enjoyed this book, and could relate to so much! I’m going to have to take a pause before I dive into the second book due to some parts being heavy, but I definitely can’t wait to dive in!
“A lot of times it does feel exhausting. Because everything bad in society is about you, but when it comes to the good, nothing is for you. I feel like I’m not enough and too much, all at the same time. And then, other times, being black feels exhilarating—because every good thing that happens feels like a victory, even the small things.”
“Black girls, they sure must die exhausted. So many battles to fight, through segregation, Jim Crow, which I saw firsthand, up through Civil Rights, and today, even. I know it must feel like a lot..”
I loved this book, and the message behind it. I loved Granny Tab, Ms. Gretchen, and Tabitha’s girl group, although quite dysfunctional—Laila & Alexis. I felt like I was watching an episode of The Game. Probably because I’m binging it at the moment, but the relationship between the three women supporting each other and being there for each other was similar. The characters in this story their voices are strong and fierce. I love the conversations that can be had through this story about race, social class, relationships, career choices and also infertility.
I honestly enjoyed this book, and could relate to so much! I’m going to have to take a pause before I dive into the second book due to some parts being heavy, but I definitely can’t wait to dive in!
“A lot of times it does feel exhausting. Because everything bad in society is about you, but when it comes to the good, nothing is for you. I feel like I’m not enough and too much, all at the same time. And then, other times, being black feels exhilarating—because every good thing that happens feels like a victory, even the small things.”
December 18, 2023
this BOOK almost made me die exhausted.
March 17, 2022
I really enjoyed this audiobook. I loved the different characters and thought the narrator did a great job. I loved the author’s writing style and I’m excited for the next few books in the series.
Tabby is a 33 year old black woman with a life checklist. She’s crossed nearly everything off. Tabby is told she is unable to have children. This comes as a shock to her. She always thought she would have them at some point in the future. Now, she didn’t realize how badly she wanted them until the choice was taken from her.
Suddenly her picture perfect life is turned upside down. With support from her family and friends turns to modern medicine for help. This process puts stress on her relationships as she struggles to have the future she’s always wanted.
Tabby is a 33 year old black woman with a life checklist. She’s crossed nearly everything off. Tabby is told she is unable to have children. This comes as a shock to her. She always thought she would have them at some point in the future. Now, she didn’t realize how badly she wanted them until the choice was taken from her.
Suddenly her picture perfect life is turned upside down. With support from her family and friends turns to modern medicine for help. This process puts stress on her relationships as she struggles to have the future she’s always wanted.
February 4, 2022
I had such high hopes for this one based on the title, however it was honestly a struggle for me to finish. It seemed to me as if the author wanted to throw all topics into one book to prove a point. I am sure that there are others who will enjoy this book, but I for one will not be rushing to read the rest in the series.
June 26, 2022
I’m actually so disappointed 😭 this was as deep as a grain of rice. It didn’t expand upon blackness or offer a new perspective at all. Tabitha and her friends are 30 but have the emotional capacity of teenagers… which makes for a frustrating read based on their choices. Also the whole job promotion thing?? Her boss was right? like she got mad because he saw potential in her and she didn’t already put in the hard work? Her asking her white grandma if she would ever choose to be black 😭😭 and her grandma giving history lessons on racism?? PLEASE.. Just unserious and would be an okay read if you aren’t a black woman or black person 🙃 i am a tiny bit curious about the second book though
Shelved as 'pass'
December 14, 2021RELATABLE AF 0___0
So I'm putting this down. The author is doing ALOT. 3% in and I've already heard about interracial cheating and divorce, infertility and police profiling/brutality. All happening to the same poor girl. Like, this is 35 minutes into a 10 hour audiobook LOL. DATS ALOT. I get that, that may be the point but sheesh, I'm good.
So I'm putting this down. The author is doing ALOT. 3% in and I've already heard about interracial cheating and divorce, infertility and police profiling/brutality. All happening to the same poor girl. Like, this is 35 minutes into a 10 hour audiobook LOL. DATS ALOT. I get that, that may be the point but sheesh, I'm good.
Shelved as 'dnf'
March 18, 2019
Black Girls Must Die Exhausted
I Picked Up This Book Because: The title
The Characters:
Tabitha Walker:
Granma Tabitha, Marc, Laila, Alexis
The Story:
I.Am.Bored. I have been bored since I started this book back in February. It’s not that the writing is bad it’s just slow. Nothing is happening and when something does happen we have to dwell on it and repeat it a thousand times before we can move on. I can’t stay invested in Tabitha’s journey. I did skip to the end and read the last chapter and the epilogue and I feel like Tab got a peaceful ending if not a traditional HEA and I’m okay knowing just that.
I do feel bad for DNF-ing this book because I wanted to love it but my love stopped at the front cover. Seriously it’s beautiful and I’d hang it on my wall.
The Random Thoughts:
*DNF so no rating
I Picked Up This Book Because: The title
The Characters:
Tabitha Walker:
Granma Tabitha, Marc, Laila, Alexis
The Story:
I.Am.Bored. I have been bored since I started this book back in February. It’s not that the writing is bad it’s just slow. Nothing is happening and when something does happen we have to dwell on it and repeat it a thousand times before we can move on. I can’t stay invested in Tabitha’s journey. I did skip to the end and read the last chapter and the epilogue and I feel like Tab got a peaceful ending if not a traditional HEA and I’m okay knowing just that.
I do feel bad for DNF-ing this book because I wanted to love it but my love stopped at the front cover. Seriously it’s beautiful and I’d hang it on my wall.
The Random Thoughts:
*DNF so no rating
June 8, 2022
I wanted to love this book, but i barely made it through the first chapter. The first few pages were fine, interesting enough, but after that it all went downhill fast. Tabitha seems selfish, and shallow almost immediately. Like, lets all engage in reckless driving to put on makeup that you could have done in the morning and then act like we don’t know why we’re being pulled over. I, a black woman, completely understand the fear of being pulled over or stopped in any way by the police. However, Tabitha’s focus of “I’m on TV, please let me go” was so-??? The writing was bad and the paragraph structure made it so hard to read.
September 30, 2019
Disappointed! The title was much more interesting than the book.
October 26, 2021
**3.5 Stars*
Tabitha is a thirty-three year old Black woman who is on track to have it all when her train veers a little. I enjoyed Tabitha's relationships with her best friends. I laughed out loud at their foolishness.
This book isn't all laughter and lightness though. It goes deep and touches on the BLM movement, Black Women and promotions, as well as mental illness.
I didn't love the love story in this one. I still rooted for Tabitha though.
I can't wait to see what is next for her!
Tabitha is a thirty-three year old Black woman who is on track to have it all when her train veers a little. I enjoyed Tabitha's relationships with her best friends. I laughed out loud at their foolishness.
This book isn't all laughter and lightness though. It goes deep and touches on the BLM movement, Black Women and promotions, as well as mental illness.
I didn't love the love story in this one. I still rooted for Tabitha though.
I can't wait to see what is next for her!
February 11, 2022
This was a reread for me and I will say it made a difference reading it a few years later when I'm closer in age to the main character as I could better relate to what she was going through. This time I definitely have more thoughts about it. I could relate to her being in a place where some of her friends and colleagues have settled down and started families. Ideally she would like to find a nice house and start having children but she experiences some roadblocks. Like her boyfriend Marc who despite being together for years isn't ready to finally settling down and get married and have children. She's also at a place in her career where she wants to advance to the next level. Just like in my first read I do feel like this book tries to tackle too many topics at once and doesn't have the space to cover them all. I thought the police brutality part could've been cut out completely. I did appreciate her reconnecting with her father and trying to form a relationship with her siblings.
3.5
3.5
February 20, 2022
Why can’t we have more books like this!? I LOVED IT. Contemporary fiction by a Black woman with all Black women at the lead. Dealing with race head on, in a “slice of life” way that allows for a nuanced view. Jayne Allen is at the top of my list of new favorite authors.
April 5, 2023
Not horrible but felt like it was trying too hard to be deep and ultimately ended up coming across as disingenuous. Tabitha sucked and left ME with exhaustion.
May 2, 2023
4 stars
This debut came at me from left field! I cried, I laughed, I shouted "why" at the book. Let's just say I connected deeply to Tabitha's emotional journey through the author's skillful window into her world. A new favorite series for me!
Characters: ★★★★★
Writing: ★★★★
Enjoyment: ★★★★★
I am so late this party—the third (and final?) book in this series is already out and I'm just now pulling up with my review of this first book. Oh well. Sometimes it's like that.
Black Girls Must Die Exhausted is that rare novel that completely transports you into the emotional journey of its protagonist. From page one, I was WITH Tabitha Walker in the way of all great storytelling. Tabitha very quickly became a friend.
Tabitha Walker did everything by the book—even down to the personal milestones. Have a good job. Have a good lifestyle routine. Have a nice-on-paper boyfriend. Have good relationships with her girlfriends. She's reaching for her next promotion and about to land a down payment for her first home. Things are looking good! Check, check, check.
But just as we meet Tabitha, her life freezes in place.
That last thing on her checklist that I forgot to mention? It was having a family. And Tabitha's just found out that she's got 6 months left of viable time to make her parenthood dreams come true.
Now it's time for Tabitha to reassess her life goals and pivot, fast. With her entire checklist now sidelined and reshuffled, we're buckled in as she swerves to keep climbing on her to success.
It seems like curveball after curveball keeps coming her way, and despite all of her successes, this last mic drop moment onto her life has got her sense of self shaking a bit. But there's happiness even in the journey, and Tabitha's framework of friends and family are there to help her weather the tide.
This novel is such a gem.
Now, to get my one and only critique out of the way—yes, this book was a bit of a rambler. I actually started with the audiobook and quickly(!) decided to transition to the physical copy because I found myself struggling to stay on pace with the meandering sense of backstory vs. real plot. There's a TON of context.
But after a while, I got into the flow. The strong sense of Tabitha's personality, which shines from the very first page, kept me going past the meandering back stories and contextual sidebars. And by the time I hit the 30% mark, I was in love with this story. I cared for Tabitha and rooted for her and her friends at each turn. They felt real, like "listening in to a conversation at the next table" real.
I'm so happy that Tabitha's journey has more books in it. While I think many readers could find satisfaction in stopping here at the end of the first book, I am definitely ready to see what happens next!
Blog | Instagram | Libro.fm Audiobooks
This debut came at me from left field! I cried, I laughed, I shouted "why" at the book. Let's just say I connected deeply to Tabitha's emotional journey through the author's skillful window into her world. A new favorite series for me!
Characters: ★★★★★
Writing: ★★★★
Enjoyment: ★★★★★
I am so late this party—the third (and final?) book in this series is already out and I'm just now pulling up with my review of this first book. Oh well. Sometimes it's like that.
Black Girls Must Die Exhausted is that rare novel that completely transports you into the emotional journey of its protagonist. From page one, I was WITH Tabitha Walker in the way of all great storytelling. Tabitha very quickly became a friend.
Tabitha Walker did everything by the book—even down to the personal milestones. Have a good job. Have a good lifestyle routine. Have a nice-on-paper boyfriend. Have good relationships with her girlfriends. She's reaching for her next promotion and about to land a down payment for her first home. Things are looking good! Check, check, check.
But just as we meet Tabitha, her life freezes in place.
That last thing on her checklist that I forgot to mention? It was having a family. And Tabitha's just found out that she's got 6 months left of viable time to make her parenthood dreams come true.
Now it's time for Tabitha to reassess her life goals and pivot, fast. With her entire checklist now sidelined and reshuffled, we're buckled in as she swerves to keep climbing on her to success.
It seems like curveball after curveball keeps coming her way, and despite all of her successes, this last mic drop moment onto her life has got her sense of self shaking a bit. But there's happiness even in the journey, and Tabitha's framework of friends and family are there to help her weather the tide.
This novel is such a gem.
Now, to get my one and only critique out of the way—yes, this book was a bit of a rambler. I actually started with the audiobook and quickly(!) decided to transition to the physical copy because I found myself struggling to stay on pace with the meandering sense of backstory vs. real plot. There's a TON of context.
But after a while, I got into the flow. The strong sense of Tabitha's personality, which shines from the very first page, kept me going past the meandering back stories and contextual sidebars. And by the time I hit the 30% mark, I was in love with this story. I cared for Tabitha and rooted for her and her friends at each turn. They felt real, like "listening in to a conversation at the next table" real.
I'm so happy that Tabitha's journey has more books in it. While I think many readers could find satisfaction in stopping here at the end of the first book, I am definitely ready to see what happens next!
Blog | Instagram | Libro.fm Audiobooks
February 11, 2024
“Somehow someone’s composure on the outside, even if assembled in the privacy of a personal world of chaos, manages to hide the storm-ravaged landscape on the inside.”
October 12, 2021
Thank you to the publisher for giving me a free copy of this book! All opinions are my own.
This book has such a striking title, no? I will say, this read was heavier than I was expecting, which now seems silly in hindsight considering the title. But just a heads up that if you’re looking for a light read, this is not the one.
Our main character is Tabitha Walker, a Black woman in her early 30s who’s got it all together: she’s just finished saving up a down payment for house, she’s up for a promotion at work, and she’s got a great boyfriend. But then life throws her a curveball when she’s told that her dream of having children one day may not be realized if she doesn’t take action soon.
I felt like Tabby’s struggles were very real. I haven’t experienced the same things that she has, but I think we’ve all had a time when things haven’t gone according to plan. How do you adjust? Do you stick with the plan or take time to reevaluate?
There’s a lot of struggle in this book and we see Tabby and her best friends Laila and Alexis go through some difficult things. Throughout the book, the author also explores the themes of complicated family dynamics, career ambition, and relationships (both romantic and platonic).
I could definitely relate to some of Tabitha’s feelings as a Black woman, but at the same time, I didn’t fully fall in love with this story. There were some scenes and comments from the characters that I didn’t love and I’m still trying to think through the purpose for including them. This is a story about facing life’s challenges and I appreciated this book for its relatability.
This book has such a striking title, no? I will say, this read was heavier than I was expecting, which now seems silly in hindsight considering the title. But just a heads up that if you’re looking for a light read, this is not the one.
Our main character is Tabitha Walker, a Black woman in her early 30s who’s got it all together: she’s just finished saving up a down payment for house, she’s up for a promotion at work, and she’s got a great boyfriend. But then life throws her a curveball when she’s told that her dream of having children one day may not be realized if she doesn’t take action soon.
I felt like Tabby’s struggles were very real. I haven’t experienced the same things that she has, but I think we’ve all had a time when things haven’t gone according to plan. How do you adjust? Do you stick with the plan or take time to reevaluate?
There’s a lot of struggle in this book and we see Tabby and her best friends Laila and Alexis go through some difficult things. Throughout the book, the author also explores the themes of complicated family dynamics, career ambition, and relationships (both romantic and platonic).
I could definitely relate to some of Tabitha’s feelings as a Black woman, but at the same time, I didn’t fully fall in love with this story. There were some scenes and comments from the characters that I didn’t love and I’m still trying to think through the purpose for including them. This is a story about facing life’s challenges and I appreciated this book for its relatability.
May 20, 2023
For a book which didn't have the strongest start, I am amazed at its pull factor.
Tabitha was the usual trope we've all seen paraded to exhaustion in Tyler Perry's movies. We've seen her as "Mary Jane" and I was a lil' disappointed at how her story started given the sheer power of the title.
The story revolves around three friends who have to face their individual challenges but always show up for each other. Tabitha, who waits anxiously for her boyfriend to take their relationship to the next level. A questionable "relationship" at best and "what relationship?" at worst. Alexis, who married her high school sweetheart and is now at crossroads and Laila who reaches breaking point but has always maintained an air of great strength. If you know "Waiting to Exhale", you'll figure out the basic story very early on but 46% into the plot, the narrative takes a very sharp turn and YOU. WILL. PAY. ATTENTION. Because Jayne Allen begins to interrogate the issues that REALLY matter to black women and their navigation thereof like reproductive rights and the cost of infertility treatments, the price one pays in the corporate world for being black and female, the complexities of step families, colourism, mixed-race families in America, ageing and assisted living, the constant feeling of being unworthy, unseen and overlooked amongst many others.
The first third of this BGMDE requires patience because the narrating becomes very sharp, pointed and interrogates the intersectionality of race, gender, class, sexuality and their navigation after the first hundred pages. I guess Jayne found her groove and decided to give us more than superficial characters because there's more to a black woman than hair, nails, weight related issues and snagging a fine black brother with good prospects!
Highly recommended.
Tabitha was the usual trope we've all seen paraded to exhaustion in Tyler Perry's movies. We've seen her as "Mary Jane" and I was a lil' disappointed at how her story started given the sheer power of the title.
The story revolves around three friends who have to face their individual challenges but always show up for each other. Tabitha, who waits anxiously for her boyfriend to take their relationship to the next level. A questionable "relationship" at best and "what relationship?" at worst. Alexis, who married her high school sweetheart and is now at crossroads and Laila who reaches breaking point but has always maintained an air of great strength. If you know "Waiting to Exhale", you'll figure out the basic story very early on but 46% into the plot, the narrative takes a very sharp turn and YOU. WILL. PAY. ATTENTION. Because Jayne Allen begins to interrogate the issues that REALLY matter to black women and their navigation thereof like reproductive rights and the cost of infertility treatments, the price one pays in the corporate world for being black and female, the complexities of step families, colourism, mixed-race families in America, ageing and assisted living, the constant feeling of being unworthy, unseen and overlooked amongst many others.
The first third of this BGMDE requires patience because the narrating becomes very sharp, pointed and interrogates the intersectionality of race, gender, class, sexuality and their navigation after the first hundred pages. I guess Jayne found her groove and decided to give us more than superficial characters because there's more to a black woman than hair, nails, weight related issues and snagging a fine black brother with good prospects!
Highly recommended.
May 3, 2023
3/5 ⭐️
- Absolutely fell in love with the friend group in this story. The author gives you just enough information about them that you want to read the rest of the books so you can get to know the rest of the characters. I wasn’t the biggest fan of the main character because she always seemed to jump to the worst conclusion for everything, but I loved so many of the other characters.
- I feel like the author was trying to make this book really deep by adding so much in this book and the title doesn’t lie… I was exhausted lol. I feel like I didn’t connect with a lot of the story because there were so many moments when the story was being told, but there wasn’t really any action. One of the characters would tell another character what happened vs actually getting to live through the story. I wish we saw more actually happening.
- I will definitely read the next two books because of the characters and characters alone! I loved hearing about the two friends and I feel like I’ll be more invested in their stories!
- Absolutely fell in love with the friend group in this story. The author gives you just enough information about them that you want to read the rest of the books so you can get to know the rest of the characters. I wasn’t the biggest fan of the main character because she always seemed to jump to the worst conclusion for everything, but I loved so many of the other characters.
- I feel like the author was trying to make this book really deep by adding so much in this book and the title doesn’t lie… I was exhausted lol. I feel like I didn’t connect with a lot of the story because there were so many moments when the story was being told, but there wasn’t really any action. One of the characters would tell another character what happened vs actually getting to live through the story. I wish we saw more actually happening.
- I will definitely read the next two books because of the characters and characters alone! I loved hearing about the two friends and I feel like I’ll be more invested in their stories!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,165 reviews