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Drop The Rock: Removing Character Defects - Steps Six and Seven
Resentment. Fear. Self-Pity. Intolerance. Anger. This cast of character defects will undermine the best-laid plans for recovery from addiction. It's not uncommon for individuals in recovery to hang on to negative, self-defeating behaviors after they've given up their addiction. These are the "rocks" that can sink recovery - or, at the least, block further progress. With more than 100,000 copies sold, Drop the Rock is the definitive guide to removing character defects that can prevent gratifying, long-standing recovery. Based on the Twelve Step program, particularly the principles behind Steps Six and Seven, Drop the Rock combines personal stories, practical advice, and powerful insights to help readers move forward in recovery. The second edition features additional stories, a reference section, and information about starting a Drop the Rock study group.
132 pages, Paperback
First published February 11, 2005
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 97 reviews
April 3, 2014
Step 6
I cant keep practicing my character defects and expect God to remove them! I have to develop a new set of habits and practice them. I must be willing to make the choice between my old and new habits. When it comes to will, I must be willing to put God's will in place of my will into action. I also have to be willing to accept that God will take care of me. I have to give up the fear of being comfortable in my own chaos and the unknown of not living the chaotic life. I have to get out of the comfort of practicing my character defects. It is the living of these defects that have hurt others, myself and separated me from God. Practicing my character defects led me to and separated me from Suzie. Another area(s) I have to let go of is belief in self. If I believe in God and believe God made me perfect in mind, body and spirit than I have to accept who I am. This is new for me as I have spent a life making me something I am not. On one hand through self discovery I am happy with what I have found. On the other am appalled at what I see. If I am to grow I have to accept me as God made me. I am to love who and what he has created.
It is courage that turns possibilities into realities and assures us that progress in improving our character is possible.
I am punished by my defects of character, not because I have them. My defects keep me from being all I can become. They limit my ability to grow.
If guilt & shame come from the past does this mean I am still living in the past? Are not these emotions from within? Yes, I can divert & or change my thoughts but I can not stop from where the thoughts come. If am to experience joy/happiness I must deal with the source of these emotions (guilt & shame).
Step 7
Humility is an attitude. Humility is acceptance of ourselves.
Step seven is about asking God to help me change the thinking, actions & behavior that stand in my way.
The way to get through fear is action-and to ask for help.
The hardest part of my life is facing my fears. If I can divert/change my thinking to: The most exciting part of my life is facing my fears! Will this not add to peace of mind?
I cant keep practicing my character defects and expect God to remove them! I have to develop a new set of habits and practice them. I must be willing to make the choice between my old and new habits. When it comes to will, I must be willing to put God's will in place of my will into action. I also have to be willing to accept that God will take care of me. I have to give up the fear of being comfortable in my own chaos and the unknown of not living the chaotic life. I have to get out of the comfort of practicing my character defects. It is the living of these defects that have hurt others, myself and separated me from God. Practicing my character defects led me to and separated me from Suzie. Another area(s) I have to let go of is belief in self. If I believe in God and believe God made me perfect in mind, body and spirit than I have to accept who I am. This is new for me as I have spent a life making me something I am not. On one hand through self discovery I am happy with what I have found. On the other am appalled at what I see. If I am to grow I have to accept me as God made me. I am to love who and what he has created.
It is courage that turns possibilities into realities and assures us that progress in improving our character is possible.
I am punished by my defects of character, not because I have them. My defects keep me from being all I can become. They limit my ability to grow.
If guilt & shame come from the past does this mean I am still living in the past? Are not these emotions from within? Yes, I can divert & or change my thoughts but I can not stop from where the thoughts come. If am to experience joy/happiness I must deal with the source of these emotions (guilt & shame).
Step 7
Humility is an attitude. Humility is acceptance of ourselves.
Step seven is about asking God to help me change the thinking, actions & behavior that stand in my way.
The way to get through fear is action-and to ask for help.
The hardest part of my life is facing my fears. If I can divert/change my thinking to: The most exciting part of my life is facing my fears! Will this not add to peace of mind?
August 25, 2012
Fantastic, has helped me be a better and have a better life. It is a great book to read at any length of sobriety. I read it at 5 years and then 10 and then just recently at 15 and it has helped change me.
November 15, 2013
I had a hard time with it. Kind of felt like everyone who has ever preached to me got together, once and for all, to tell me how to live my life.
May 19, 2022
For those familiar with the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Step program, this book focuses on Steps 6 and 7. That is, "6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character," and "7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings." So, after completing Steps 4 and 5, one's inventory of personal character defects becomes obvious. But if God removes all of one's character defects, many of us would be "the hole in the doughnut". What would be left of us? This book goes through the fears one might have before asking one's Higher Power to remove one's character defects, and (as is implied in Step 7) becoming of service to one's fellows... not just one's fellows in AA, but of service to everyone. It seems like a lot of work, but compared to the disaster an alcoholic leaves in his wake and the work it takes to clean up that mess, the spiritual work seems an easy trade.
This book also features opinions from various members of AA, men and women, and how they approached working Steps 6 & 7. The audiobook narrator has a great voice, but he doesn't do voices, so when a woman's story is being read, the narrator keeps his same voice. It is a toss up whether this is good or bad. Audiobooks are presentations, and in this case it should not be considered entertainment. Thus feigning a female voice by a male narrator might be considered inappropriate. Your mileage may vary.
Fabulous work. I'd read it again and recommend it to anyone working a 12 Step program including Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous and such.
This book also features opinions from various members of AA, men and women, and how they approached working Steps 6 & 7. The audiobook narrator has a great voice, but he doesn't do voices, so when a woman's story is being read, the narrator keeps his same voice. It is a toss up whether this is good or bad. Audiobooks are presentations, and in this case it should not be considered entertainment. Thus feigning a female voice by a male narrator might be considered inappropriate. Your mileage may vary.
Fabulous work. I'd read it again and recommend it to anyone working a 12 Step program including Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous and such.
August 24, 2019
My recovery depends on the teachings of this book.
October 6, 2012
Excellent book for people in recovery from addiction. Written about the 6th and 7th steps from the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, it is a wonderful source for instruction on living out these steps. I will keep my copy and reread it over and over, as a reminder and to continue to grow in my understanding about how to live "right sized" when I tend to think, falsely, that I am bigger or smaller than my problems.
August 7, 2013
Profoundly changed my approach to steps six and seven. I am grateful for the opportunity to see how crucial these previously under-appreciated steps are in my journey. Dropping the effing rock remains a necessity within my daily routine.
August 20, 2014
Excellent advice written in a clear and concise manner. I recommend to anyone in recovery.
December 27, 2015
Very helpful book. An essential for those in a 12 step program!
September 8, 2016
Great....
November 23, 2020
Good but has the 12 step issue of not enough practical advice and too much God reliance (for me)
February 9, 2024
Loved it. Steps 6 and 7 have been quick and easy in my doing of the steps. Really great insight into how giving God our shortcomings is truly a decision and one to ask for with intention.
May 2, 2022
Rating: 9/10
Pages 100
This book reads very easily between talking about character defects and not living in resentment, with great shares in between, and moving through understanding of the steps. For myself, it was a better way to hear about resentments and being aware of my defects (which I am painfully aware of) and using that to my advantage. It is a book of self awareness and not letting that gremlin in my head go to town about it all. Instead taking all the other steps and moving through them. This book took me a long time to finish as I tend to really have to stop and reflect every darn page. But like so many other books I have started tackling in this adulting world, I am pretty sure the book weighs twice as much with all the highlighting and notes.
Keeping on the shelves
Pages 100
This book reads very easily between talking about character defects and not living in resentment, with great shares in between, and moving through understanding of the steps. For myself, it was a better way to hear about resentments and being aware of my defects (which I am painfully aware of) and using that to my advantage. It is a book of self awareness and not letting that gremlin in my head go to town about it all. Instead taking all the other steps and moving through them. This book took me a long time to finish as I tend to really have to stop and reflect every darn page. But like so many other books I have started tackling in this adulting world, I am pretty sure the book weighs twice as much with all the highlighting and notes.
Keeping on the shelves
June 15, 2020
"Seperating the men from the boys" is a figure of speech and is not sexist. I can't read past the narrow minded subjective opinion of the first chapter. Look up the definition of the word sexist before you use it in a sentence. That's like saying Mary's Story is sexist because Mary is a female and there is no reference to a male in the story....there fore it's sexist. The writer obviously holding on to some resentment towards men or some other driving factor that would create you to say something is sexist when it is clearly not. Idiots...you are the reason why people need a 12 step program. You are the fucking problem
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December 1, 2021It is the latest example of Fellowship Best Sellers, following the path of The Road Less Travelled, Not God and others. It is a welcome addition to the program literature table. It is a profound and valuable meditation on defect removal; in my experience, my capacity to generate personal defects is boundless, so mediation on their removal is never-ending.
This is a great contribution to Program spiritual literature.
This is a great contribution to Program spiritual literature.
July 1, 2024
The first 3/4 of the book is sprinkled with thoughts and meditations worth (re)visiting, but by the end of the book I couldn't help but feel the author falls on the zealotry end of the zealotry-enlightment spectrum. Bill W in the Big Book and 12 and 12 is pretty clear that the primary purpose is about alcoholism, but the author suggests individuals go to almost monastic ends to become willing to give up their character defects to God. Not entirely off base, but too extreme for my tastes.
April 23, 2021
I really appreciate and value the words in this book. Coupled with the timing of the season of life, it brought healing, gave tools, and offered good practice to develop new healthy patterns. Changing lifestyle rhythms can feel discouraging and overwhelming. This book provided breathing room and good, necessary pep talks that were invaluable to me.
November 1, 2021
Recovery Based
My sponsor and I read this together and it has lot's of insight on how to stay sober. I enjoyed the story in the last chapter about why keeping the rock seemed so important at first. I am glad it was on Kindle Unlimited cause of my budget.
Hoping to read the next book when
on Kindle Unlimited as well...
My sponsor and I read this together and it has lot's of insight on how to stay sober. I enjoyed the story in the last chapter about why keeping the rock seemed so important at first. I am glad it was on Kindle Unlimited cause of my budget.
Hoping to read the next book when
on Kindle Unlimited as well...
April 29, 2023
A book evangelising the lore and details regarding step 6 and 7 of the “12-step” program for AA.
I had not been familiar with the subculture that exists around this program. The content is interesting regardless of one’s addiction to alcohol, there are teachings for self betterment communicated with high conviction.
I had not been familiar with the subculture that exists around this program. The content is interesting regardless of one’s addiction to alcohol, there are teachings for self betterment communicated with high conviction.
February 11, 2024
A great guide through steps 6 and 7 of the 12 step. The AA Bib Book says very little about steps 6 and 7 which can give the impression that they are less important. This book reminds us not only that they are important but that they are vital to growth in recovery. The book also gives very practical guidance. I will be reading it again!
February 29, 2024
Interesting book, that tries to give us a path on how to be in life in a way that is worth it.
Think the book could be much better than what I felt, it tries to describe the steps needed to achieve that state, but only in the end presents them, making it quite difficult in the beginning of the book to understand what was each step purpose that was trying to present.
Think the book could be much better than what I felt, it tries to describe the steps needed to achieve that state, but only in the end presents them, making it quite difficult in the beginning of the book to understand what was each step purpose that was trying to present.
August 9, 2017
A good review of steps six and seven as written in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. Good use of personal stories to elucidate the points being made. Somewhat limited in some of the discussion but a worthy road map for any human dealing with the rigors of the human condition.
December 21, 2017
Inspiring
It was a challenge I heeded. It reminded me to see the steps everyday. My recovery of 30 years has had ups and downs. I heeded to look at my recovery in an old light just the way I did on the beginning.
It was a challenge I heeded. It reminded me to see the steps everyday. My recovery of 30 years has had ups and downs. I heeded to look at my recovery in an old light just the way I did on the beginning.
April 17, 2018
this book was a good explanation of the attitudes and actions needed to make a productive start on the 6th and 7th steps. I enjoyed the personal stories included in the book, they made the ideas more relatable for me.
March 19, 2019
Great book on expanding the importance of steps six and seven. Two steps commonly overlooked because they are misunderstood , yet so imperative to sobriety. Read it through with my sponsor and he was able to help answer my questions.
November 2, 2019
Great inspiration and guide for really letting go of character defects.
Great inspiration and guide for really letting go of character defects. Makes so clear what one needs to do, and the outlook that breeds victory!
Great inspiration and guide for really letting go of character defects. Makes so clear what one needs to do, and the outlook that breeds victory!
April 8, 2020
A revelation in my own personal recovery.
I highly recommend this book. It helped me to dive deeper into the meaning and purpose of steps 6 and 7 in my 12 step recovery process. It helped me understand what is meant by “defects” too - which are really just behaviors that I learned in order to survive in my world - not necessarily “bad” or “good” - just traits that do not serve me very well now. A wonderful addition to my toolbox.
I highly recommend this book. It helped me to dive deeper into the meaning and purpose of steps 6 and 7 in my 12 step recovery process. It helped me understand what is meant by “defects” too - which are really just behaviors that I learned in order to survive in my world - not necessarily “bad” or “good” - just traits that do not serve me very well now. A wonderful addition to my toolbox.
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August 4, 2020I believe that this will help you who are looking for sobriety and a life second to none. I found it,and hope to give it to somone ..
Who can really benefit from it. I believe that this will help those in need of some good soul searching.
Who can really benefit from it. I believe that this will help those in need of some good soul searching.
Read
October 2, 2020Very Enlightened
I learned that these 2 Steps really are about having deeper trust in my HP and trusting my HP will continue to solve ALL my problems. That includes removing these fears. Which is what I am asking my HP to do in Step 7. Can't wait to read the follow-up book!!
I learned that these 2 Steps really are about having deeper trust in my HP and trusting my HP will continue to solve ALL my problems. That includes removing these fears. Which is what I am asking my HP to do in Step 7. Can't wait to read the follow-up book!!
March 26, 2021
Great motivational book for those working the 12 steps. A more in depth look at steps 6 and 7 and how they apply to everyday life. Also a good read for those working with substance abuse patients. Helpful motivational tidbits throughout the book.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 97 reviews