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It Ended Badly: Thirteen of the Worst Breakups in History
A history of heartbreak-replete with beheadings, uprisings, creepy sex dolls, and celebrity gossip-and its disastrously bad consequences throughout time
Spanning eras and cultures from ancient Rome to medieval England to 1950s Hollywood, Jennifer Wright's It Ended Badly guides you through the worst of the worst in historically bad breakups. In the throes of heartbreak, Emperor Nero had just about everyone he ever loved-from his old tutor to most of his friends-put to death. Oscar Wilde's lover, whom he went to jail for, abandoned him when faced with being cut off financially from his wealthy family and wrote several self-serving books denying the entire affair. And poor volatile Caroline Lamb sent Lord Byron one hell of a torch letter and enclosed a bloody lock of her own pubic hair. Your obsessive social media stalking of your ex isn't looking so bad now, is it?
With a wry wit and considerable empathy, Wright digs deep into the archives to bring these thirteen terrible breakups to life. She educates, entertains, and really puts your own bad breakup conduct into perspective. It Ended Badly is for anyone who's ever loved and lost and maybe sent one too many ill-considered late-night emails to their ex, reminding us that no matter how badly we've behaved, no one is as bad as Henry VIII.
240 pages, Hardcover
First published November 3, 2015
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,159 reviews
November 20, 2015
Full disclosure: I am biased because the author and myself are literally the same person.
March 7, 2021
Wspaniała
August 19, 2021
2,5/5
Za dużo śmieszków, za mało mięsa.
Za dużo śmieszków, za mało mięsa.
August 9, 2021
These breakups are truly awful. I was horrified and disgusted by the Roman emperor Nero. He was quite the zero. In brutality and ruthlessness, he scores the highest for worst uncoupling in history. When you read about what he did and what Roman society was like (coming up with novel and fun ways to torture and kill people), you realize how great it is to live in modern society. So, if you are depressed about your job, love life or family, look to history to make you feel a thousand times better.
There are thirteen, unlucky in love, couples in the book, from Roman times until Hollywood of the 1950s. Wright is funny and charming and brings levity to even the worst of these stories. I was unfamiliar with all of them, except for Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn; Caroline Lamb and Lord Byron; and John Ruskin and Effie Gray.
If you want to read a marvelous book on Victorian couples, please pick up Parallel Lives: Five Victorian Marriages. There is no humor in it. All the men are truly awful, including Charles Dickens; that book is how I knew about John Ruskin and Effie Gray.
There are thirteen, unlucky in love, couples in the book, from Roman times until Hollywood of the 1950s. Wright is funny and charming and brings levity to even the worst of these stories. I was unfamiliar with all of them, except for Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn; Caroline Lamb and Lord Byron; and John Ruskin and Effie Gray.
If you want to read a marvelous book on Victorian couples, please pick up Parallel Lives: Five Victorian Marriages. There is no humor in it. All the men are truly awful, including Charles Dickens; that book is how I knew about John Ruskin and Effie Gray.
November 22, 2015
The author made this such a fun and interesting way to learn a bit of history. Her sarcastic comments and amusing anecdotes made this a pure joy to read. She reminds me of my sophomore history teacher whose way of teaching made me fall forever in love with all things historical.
Of course many of these breakups were beyond nasty, none more so than the less than delightful, Henry the Eighth. Still there were some strange characters from many areas in Europe that were weirder than weird. Also learned many interesting tidbits, such as the phrase, Keeping up with the Jones, which referenced Edith Wharton's father who was beyond wealthy as was Edith herself.
Some may find some of the comments over the top but if you just go with the flow I think you will find much amusing but informative as well.
Of course many of these breakups were beyond nasty, none more so than the less than delightful, Henry the Eighth. Still there were some strange characters from many areas in Europe that were weirder than weird. Also learned many interesting tidbits, such as the phrase, Keeping up with the Jones, which referenced Edith Wharton's father who was beyond wealthy as was Edith herself.
Some may find some of the comments over the top but if you just go with the flow I think you will find much amusing but informative as well.
March 21, 2020
3.5 Stars
Love hurts and quite frankly, Wright hammers that message quite harshly here with snarky, humorous, and sobering commentary.
I’m a lover of happy endings, and you’re definitely not going to get that here. However, if you’re a history buff, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed by the detailed accounts of infamous people and their oft bizarre, shockingly violent, sometimes horrifying, and mostly tragic conclusions.
Thankfully, this is not the norm as this does not apply obviously to all those who have found love, but take note and go tell/show/proclaim to your special someone just how much you care!
Love hurts and quite frankly, Wright hammers that message quite harshly here with snarky, humorous, and sobering commentary.
I’m a lover of happy endings, and you’re definitely not going to get that here. However, if you’re a history buff, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed by the detailed accounts of infamous people and their oft bizarre, shockingly violent, sometimes horrifying, and mostly tragic conclusions.
Thankfully, this is not the norm as this does not apply obviously to all those who have found love, but take note and go tell/show/proclaim to your special someone just how much you care!
April 19, 2020
Examining other people's relationships and the various dramas that result in their demise is always fascinating to read about. Combine that content with Wright's ability to present facts in a fun and tongue of cheek writing style, and you're onto a winner. This was entertaining, insightful and funny. I think my favourite chapter was about Elizabeth Taylor, Eddie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds. And Richard Burton. I'm definitely in the camp that they were over dramatic, passionate soul mates who brought out the worst in each other but also couldn't resist each other. They're absolutely absorbing to read about.
Othet highlights while reading:
Nero really was insane. Also, never knew just how obsessed Romans were with poison.
Eleanor of Aquitaine. What a legend. What a woman.
I love the drama of the Borgias. Lucretia was a woman ahead of her time. To convince a jury to annual a marriage when you're heavily pregnant.... Genius.
Some interesting opinions on the Tudor queens (if not entirely accurate...) with a bit of a feminist spin.
Timothy Dexter. The luckiest, and also the most incredibly insane, man in all of the Americas. He sold mittens. In the West Indies. For a profit. And held a mock wake that he spied on and went on to cane his wife for because she didn't cry over this death. Wow.
Caroline Lamb and Lord Byron. I don't think that it's socially acceptable at any point to send your ex public hair to try and win him back. Wow.
Oskar Kokoschkar. Commissioned a lifelike doll of his ex after a breakup. Enough said.
Norman Mailer. Talented writer. Awful person, terrible husband. Don't let him near your knives at parties.
Fun, factual and endlessly entertaining. I love the way Wright collates these non fiction books and makes them so accessible. She makes me want to explore history in greater depths, which is always a positive.
Othet highlights while reading:
Nero really was insane. Also, never knew just how obsessed Romans were with poison.
Eleanor of Aquitaine. What a legend. What a woman.
I love the drama of the Borgias. Lucretia was a woman ahead of her time. To convince a jury to annual a marriage when you're heavily pregnant.... Genius.
Some interesting opinions on the Tudor queens (if not entirely accurate...) with a bit of a feminist spin.
Timothy Dexter. The luckiest, and also the most incredibly insane, man in all of the Americas. He sold mittens. In the West Indies. For a profit. And held a mock wake that he spied on and went on to cane his wife for because she didn't cry over this death. Wow.
Caroline Lamb and Lord Byron. I don't think that it's socially acceptable at any point to send your ex public hair to try and win him back. Wow.
Oskar Kokoschkar. Commissioned a lifelike doll of his ex after a breakup. Enough said.
Norman Mailer. Talented writer. Awful person, terrible husband. Don't let him near your knives at parties.
Fun, factual and endlessly entertaining. I love the way Wright collates these non fiction books and makes them so accessible. She makes me want to explore history in greater depths, which is always a positive.
November 23, 2015
“No one gossips about other people’s secret virtues.”—Bertrand Russell
How true! What fun would that be? And this book is fun and snarky. In a very 21st century way, the author discusses some of the most prominent romantic break-ups in history. It can be difficult to judge the past by their own standards, so let’s not, just for the duration of this little book. Get all judgey with 21st century values and giggle while you do it.
There are poets behaving badly (Lord Byron), Romans behaving viciously (Nero), and rather sad tales, like Oscar Wilde (eventually abandoned by the guy that he went to jail for). Then there are the ladies who won the public relations battle—Elizabeth Taylor and Debbie Reynolds, whose friendship outlasted both of their marriages to Eddie Fischer.
Light & frothy, just the thing to get you interested in reading serious biographies of some of these people, and a wonderful change from heavier fare.
How true! What fun would that be? And this book is fun and snarky. In a very 21st century way, the author discusses some of the most prominent romantic break-ups in history. It can be difficult to judge the past by their own standards, so let’s not, just for the duration of this little book. Get all judgey with 21st century values and giggle while you do it.
There are poets behaving badly (Lord Byron), Romans behaving viciously (Nero), and rather sad tales, like Oscar Wilde (eventually abandoned by the guy that he went to jail for). Then there are the ladies who won the public relations battle—Elizabeth Taylor and Debbie Reynolds, whose friendship outlasted both of their marriages to Eddie Fischer.
Light & frothy, just the thing to get you interested in reading serious biographies of some of these people, and a wonderful change from heavier fare.
June 26, 2018
The title "It Ended Badly" could have described this book..... except it also started badly as well. It was much too cutesy for me.
January 26, 2016
2 1/2 stars
I read this between other books for the past 2 months and was actually relieved when I was finally done. I have promised myself that this year I will try to be more honest with my ratings but I went back and forth between a 2 and 3 star the whole time I was reading.
Humour is sometimes a tricky thing to get right for everyone. What is funny for one person just sounds facetious to another. I knew from the start this was going to be a book that does not take a very academically rigorous look at certain historical figures but more a light hearted poking of fun at them. But unfortunately the majority of the author’s running commentary throughout felt very juvenile and contrived and at the end started irritating me.
The book covers 13 couples in history and their messy breakups. The author often cites comparisons to current pop culture to show similarities or how they fit into the social hierarchy and because of that it made me feel as if this book would be well suited to girls between the ages of 17 and 22 going through their first bad breakup.
But it was not all bad. I like list-type books as it gives one exposure to historical figures you may not have thought to read about. For example, King Nero (the first story), he was even worse than Henry 8 in my opinion and I will definitely look out for more books about him. Other historical figures include Liz Taylor and her host of husbands, the Borgias, Norman Mailer (Who?), Edith Wharton and Morton Fullerton (WHO?) , Caroline Lamb & Lord Byron, Oscar Wilde, Anna Ivanovna (who I want to read more about ) and a host of others.
I am in the minority with my feelings about this book so my advice is to get a sample chapter of the book and make your own call.
I read this between other books for the past 2 months and was actually relieved when I was finally done. I have promised myself that this year I will try to be more honest with my ratings but I went back and forth between a 2 and 3 star the whole time I was reading.
Humour is sometimes a tricky thing to get right for everyone. What is funny for one person just sounds facetious to another. I knew from the start this was going to be a book that does not take a very academically rigorous look at certain historical figures but more a light hearted poking of fun at them. But unfortunately the majority of the author’s running commentary throughout felt very juvenile and contrived and at the end started irritating me.
The book covers 13 couples in history and their messy breakups. The author often cites comparisons to current pop culture to show similarities or how they fit into the social hierarchy and because of that it made me feel as if this book would be well suited to girls between the ages of 17 and 22 going through their first bad breakup.
But it was not all bad. I like list-type books as it gives one exposure to historical figures you may not have thought to read about. For example, King Nero (the first story), he was even worse than Henry 8 in my opinion and I will definitely look out for more books about him. Other historical figures include Liz Taylor and her host of husbands, the Borgias, Norman Mailer (Who?), Edith Wharton and Morton Fullerton (WHO?) , Caroline Lamb & Lord Byron, Oscar Wilde, Anna Ivanovna (who I want to read more about ) and a host of others.
I am in the minority with my feelings about this book so my advice is to get a sample chapter of the book and make your own call.
June 7, 2023
5 stars
This book combines history, random facts of knowledge that nobody might need to know unless you’re a historian or on a quiz show, and insights of wisdom. It’s a perfect book for me to where I plan to get my own physical copy to annotate. Ms. Wright might become a new favorite nonfiction author if the rest of her books are this good. Her commentary was witty yet had her own personal touch to it. Made it feel like I was listening to a friend sharing their thoughts on a subject we were discussing. The narrator wasn’t my favorite at first but she grew on me over time. I think it’s best to listen to her in long listening sessions if you pick up the audio version, but that can be for most people in regards to any book including historical research. I didn’t want to stop listening and definitely plan to physically read for annotating purposes, so this is a 5 star for me.
This book combines history, random facts of knowledge that nobody might need to know unless you’re a historian or on a quiz show, and insights of wisdom. It’s a perfect book for me to where I plan to get my own physical copy to annotate. Ms. Wright might become a new favorite nonfiction author if the rest of her books are this good. Her commentary was witty yet had her own personal touch to it. Made it feel like I was listening to a friend sharing their thoughts on a subject we were discussing. The narrator wasn’t my favorite at first but she grew on me over time. I think it’s best to listen to her in long listening sessions if you pick up the audio version, but that can be for most people in regards to any book including historical research. I didn’t want to stop listening and definitely plan to physically read for annotating purposes, so this is a 5 star for me.
May 2, 2021
4⭐️ Naprawdę ciekawa książka z humorem, który idealnie wpasowuje się w moje gusta. Serio, skończyły mi się znaczniki do zaznaczania śmiesznych momentów, bo tyle ich było. Aż chciało się poznać kolejną historię po skończeniu danego rozdziału.
February 5, 2022
Happy pre-Valentine's day!
To celebrate, we read ... THIS! :)
It's perfect fodder for all you peeps out there who want examples of relationships that turned out so much worse than your own.
I'd LIKE to say that it perfectly captures the true spirit of human stupidity and obsession, too, but it's 2022 and that's a total hold my beer moment that makes just about everything else pale in comparison.
Nero's burning Rome over a dead lover? I suspect the California wildfires were set to Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. Don't you wonder what THAT story was all about?
Lord Byron's romance read like Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Trump might have been inspired by Norman Mailer. And the others are just as fun/wicked/ugly.
Definitely worth the read. You know, to make yourself feel better. :)
To celebrate, we read ... THIS! :)
It's perfect fodder for all you peeps out there who want examples of relationships that turned out so much worse than your own.
I'd LIKE to say that it perfectly captures the true spirit of human stupidity and obsession, too, but it's 2022 and that's a total hold my beer moment that makes just about everything else pale in comparison.
Nero's burning Rome over a dead lover? I suspect the California wildfires were set to Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. Don't you wonder what THAT story was all about?
Lord Byron's romance read like Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Trump might have been inspired by Norman Mailer. And the others are just as fun/wicked/ugly.
Definitely worth the read. You know, to make yourself feel better. :)
November 24, 2015
The title pretty much says it all. This was a fun book to read. Wright has a nice, light touch with the material that works wonderfully well. Her sense of humor smooths out some of the rougher edges of these tales. One hopes that any reader in the midst of a bad breakup will console themselves with the thought that, at least they're not breaking up with Norman Mailer. Or Nero. Or Lucrecia Borgia. Or ... This is one of those books that's every bit as charming and entertaining as the title and cover promise. Jennifer Wright's prose sparkles in all the right places. I would definitely read more of her work. Recommended!
December 11, 2018
Is Jennifer Wright becoming a new favorite author? YUP.
February 11, 2016
“If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody come sit next to me.” ― Alice Roosevelt Longworth
Alice would have loved this book. In fact she would have insisted that Jen sit next to her at dinner and then drop by the next day so they could continue their tear down session. Because Jen --Jennifer Wright = Jen -- cuts through all the historical 'glamour' and gets right down to calling a nasty breakup what it is; a chance to perfectly awful to one another.
As for me, I LOVED THIS BOOK. It was funny and snarky and after the first two chapters I decided that it was going to end far too soon. So I passed a mandate for myself that I would only read one chapter per night. Thus to make it last as long as possible.
Honestly, it was like snarky gossip with your best friend. Getting down in everyone's business in the worst way. I want more.
I KNOW this one won't be to everyone's taste, but it's my kind of humor and I found it entertaining as well as educational. To that end let me say that Ms. Wright has done her historical homework but this is hardly an academic tome. This is about how Caroline Lamb cut off a bit of her nether region and sent it to Lord Byron and how he wisely refrained from replying in kind.
Highly Recommend.
~review copy
September 14, 2017
Aslına bakarsanız kitaba çok uzun zaman önce başlamıştım fakat sonra kitabın varlığını unutmuşum. Ve kitabı geçen gün Goodreads hesabımı 'yanlışlıkla' talan ettiğimde tekrar hatırladım. Ve bitirmek istedim çünkü zaten kitabı severek okuyordum, neden unutulup gittiğini bile hatırlamıyorum.
Jennifer Wright kendine has mizah yüklü anlatımı ile tarihe damgasını vuran 13 ayrılığı anlatıyor bize. Ama öyle sandığınız gibi 'beni terk etti eşyalarını yaktım, internette fotoğraflarını satışa çıkardım' tarzı ayrılıklar değil bunlar. Mesela içlerinden bir tanesi sevgilisinin kellesini aldırırken bir başkası erkek kölesini kız gibi giydirip ona sevgilisinin ismi ile sesleniyordu ve emin olun ki bu söylediklerim kitapta okuduklarımın yanında hiç kalıyor. ( Anna İvanovna bir çifti düğün gecelerinde çıplak olarak buzdan saraya kilitlemiş, düşünebiliyor musunuz ? Ben düşünemiyorum. )
Yazarın anlatımı sayesinde büyük zevk alarak okuduğum bir kitap oldu Böyle mi Olacaktı ?
Sana puanım dokuz kanka.
Ayrıca tarihteki en sevdiğim çift net olarak bu çifttir adhjasgda
Jennifer Wright kendine has mizah yüklü anlatımı ile tarihe damgasını vuran 13 ayrılığı anlatıyor bize. Ama öyle sandığınız gibi 'beni terk etti eşyalarını yaktım, internette fotoğraflarını satışa çıkardım' tarzı ayrılıklar değil bunlar. Mesela içlerinden bir tanesi sevgilisinin kellesini aldırırken bir başkası erkek kölesini kız gibi giydirip ona sevgilisinin ismi ile sesleniyordu ve emin olun ki bu söylediklerim kitapta okuduklarımın yanında hiç kalıyor. ( Anna İvanovna bir çifti düğün gecelerinde çıplak olarak buzdan saraya kilitlemiş, düşünebiliyor musunuz ? Ben düşünemiyorum. )
Yazarın anlatımı sayesinde büyük zevk alarak okuduğum bir kitap oldu Böyle mi Olacaktı ?
Sana puanım dokuz kanka.
Ayrıca tarihteki en sevdiğim çift net olarak bu çifttir adhjasgda
June 21, 2023
Anyone who has been through a rough breakup can relate to this: It Ended Badly. Jennifer Wright dives into 13 of the most turbulent breakups in history. We start with Nero and Poppaea of Rome and that ended... well badly! We also see the relationships of Henry the VIII and *insert any of the 6 wives here*, Oscar Wilde and his wild love life, and ending with Debbie Reynolds/Eddie Fisher/Elizabeth Taylor (if you know, you know). If you're currently working your way through a breakup, definitely give this a try, if anything it will make you feel better (it did for me!). If you're happy in your relationship, give this a try to learn how far relationships and civilization has come since the time of Nero. – Alyssa C.
February 5, 2022
I’ve come to really enjoy this author’s writing style as she manages to convey a great deal of (in this case: historical) information in a very nicely flowing and entertaining way.
We are taken on a tour through history to witness the breakups of 13 more or less famous couples. If you wanna know which couples, please refer to my status updates as I commented on each chapter / couple there.
This is from the author’s introduction:
We know there is nothing better than love. Even a Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough ice-cream cookie, while a close second, is not as good. (I have, admittedly, never tried heroin.) You don’t even have to believe in love for his statement to be true. Love isn’t Santa Claus. It is real emotion that results in altered brain chemistry. […] Evolutionary biologists found that people experiencing heartbreak have brain scans that mirror those of cocaine addicts in withdrawal.
There is a great scene in the classic movie The Lion in Winter (1968) where a group of men are waiting to be killed. One says that he is determined to die nobly, and a second replies, „You chivalric fool, as If the way one fell down mattered.“ The first responds, „When the fall is all there is, it matters.“
The stories show the worst humanity has to offer: from Nero burning down Rome to Norman Mailer stabbing his wife (twice). They are all true stories, nicely researched, giving us a bit of a feel for the times these people lived in as well.
And yes, it’s pure Schadenfreude to read and especially fitting around V-Day (I’m not into the lovey-dovey stuff so this was a great alternative).
We are taken on a tour through history to witness the breakups of 13 more or less famous couples. If you wanna know which couples, please refer to my status updates as I commented on each chapter / couple there.
This is from the author’s introduction:
We know there is nothing better than love. Even a Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough ice-cream cookie, while a close second, is not as good. (I have, admittedly, never tried heroin.) You don’t even have to believe in love for his statement to be true. Love isn’t Santa Claus. It is real emotion that results in altered brain chemistry. […] Evolutionary biologists found that people experiencing heartbreak have brain scans that mirror those of cocaine addicts in withdrawal.
There is a great scene in the classic movie The Lion in Winter (1968) where a group of men are waiting to be killed. One says that he is determined to die nobly, and a second replies, „You chivalric fool, as If the way one fell down mattered.“ The first responds, „When the fall is all there is, it matters.“
The stories show the worst humanity has to offer: from Nero burning down Rome to Norman Mailer stabbing his wife (twice). They are all true stories, nicely researched, giving us a bit of a feel for the times these people lived in as well.
And yes, it’s pure Schadenfreude to read and especially fitting around V-Day (I’m not into the lovey-dovey stuff so this was a great alternative).
January 4, 2016
2.5 stars rounded up for the level of classlessness that this entire reaches. It's so extreme that I can't help but admit that gossip level achievement attained. It is all of one piece in this tone, despite the 13 different chapters of despicable couples. Wright often makes comparisons to idol or celeb figures of today to illustrate social placements and other associative hierarchies. Or any duality in looks.
I could be wrong, but in some of the cases, I think she may have gotten some of the actual facts more assumed that researched. Although I thought her constant attempts at humor, sarcasm, farce and opinion were not in anyway disguised as anything but fun- to me they were so broad that they got old very fast. This is like reading History through a plot or dialogue of a "Dumb and Dumber" type film.
The photos were good. I appreciated them. But did not often concur on Wright's opinion of who was hot or not.
I could be wrong, but in some of the cases, I think she may have gotten some of the actual facts more assumed that researched. Although I thought her constant attempts at humor, sarcasm, farce and opinion were not in anyway disguised as anything but fun- to me they were so broad that they got old very fast. This is like reading History through a plot or dialogue of a "Dumb and Dumber" type film.
The photos were good. I appreciated them. But did not often concur on Wright's opinion of who was hot or not.
September 1, 2015
Snark snark snark snark snark... oh, and history and vengeful spurned lovers.
...and snark.
...and snark.
July 28, 2016
You guys. This book had everything:
1. Historical facts and stories spanning hundreds of years
2. Weird facts about well-known (and not-so-much) historical figures
3. Humor (for serious, some serious laughs)
4. Unbiased commentary on what shitty people certain historical figures were (coughcoughNORMALMAILERcough)
5. Some real feels, for reals (Oscar Wilde SAD FACE)
I also enjoyed that it was basically a history lesson wrapped in gossip, which was AWESOME.
It Ended Badly is a quick, interesting read, full of bizarre stories about some historical figures you may know, and some you may not. When I picked up this book based on someone’s recommendation (I’M SORRY I CAN’T REMEMBER WHO I NEED TO START KEEPING A SPREADSHEET), I had absolutely no idea what it was about, I only knew that I liked the title and I liked the cover. (I know we have that whole “don’t judge a book by its cover” thing but I think we can all agree that for some reason that saying doesn’t really apply to books, yeah? OK, good.)
Anyway, I sort of thought this book was going to be about the author’s own personal horrible breakup stories, and saying they were the worst breakups in history was just one of those over exaggerations that people use when they’re in the throes of despair (you know, like after a breakup). Imagine my utter DELIGHT (seriously, just imagine it) when I discovered Jennifer Wright was going to instead talk some serious shit about some super shitty people from the past. I WAS SO EXCITED.
I wish I’d written down some of my favorite facts from this book because there were A LOT but I didn’t think of it until just now and, as of right now, I don’t know how to time travel. Maybe Future!Me knows how, but so far, she’s not sharing that information with Present!Me because SHE'S RUDE. Anyway, here are some things that I learned from this book:
1. Nero was fucking insane, which I knew, but like even more whackadoo crazy than I thought. I don’t want to spoiler too much but he killed his wife in a horrific fashion and then made a slave who sort of looked like her BECOME her basically? A male slave. So. Yeah.
2. Lord Byron was in this, of course, but was not the one behaving badly in terms of the breakup? Or at least he looked better by comparison...sort of? Honestly, I would read an entire book about his exploits with Catherine Lamb, does that exist?
3. Timothy Dexter, who I had never heard of, was delightfully crazy in a way that sort of reminds me of Trump but Timothy Dexter doesn’t make me want to vomit out of my eyeballs so I guess it’s not the same at all. For instance, he wrote an autobiography where he didn’t use any punctuation, and when someone pointed it out, he included just a full page of punctuation in the second printing. Like, all the punctuation, so people could pick and choose what they needed and put it in themselves. SO UNINTENTIONALLY HILARIOUS, it’s just the best.
4. Eleanor of Aquitaine was BADASS.
5. The parts about Debbie Reynolds and Elizabeth Taylor’s friendship legit made me tear up.
6. ICE CASTLE. Seriously, just read this.
If you at all enjoy reading anything about history or horrible breakups or just historical figures behaving badly, all written like you were gossiping with a friend, this book is perfect for you. Pick it up!
1. Historical facts and stories spanning hundreds of years
2. Weird facts about well-known (and not-so-much) historical figures
3. Humor (for serious, some serious laughs)
4. Unbiased commentary on what shitty people certain historical figures were (coughcoughNORMALMAILERcough)
5. Some real feels, for reals (Oscar Wilde SAD FACE)
I also enjoyed that it was basically a history lesson wrapped in gossip, which was AWESOME.
It Ended Badly is a quick, interesting read, full of bizarre stories about some historical figures you may know, and some you may not. When I picked up this book based on someone’s recommendation (I’M SORRY I CAN’T REMEMBER WHO I NEED TO START KEEPING A SPREADSHEET), I had absolutely no idea what it was about, I only knew that I liked the title and I liked the cover. (I know we have that whole “don’t judge a book by its cover” thing but I think we can all agree that for some reason that saying doesn’t really apply to books, yeah? OK, good.)
Anyway, I sort of thought this book was going to be about the author’s own personal horrible breakup stories, and saying they were the worst breakups in history was just one of those over exaggerations that people use when they’re in the throes of despair (you know, like after a breakup). Imagine my utter DELIGHT (seriously, just imagine it) when I discovered Jennifer Wright was going to instead talk some serious shit about some super shitty people from the past. I WAS SO EXCITED.
I wish I’d written down some of my favorite facts from this book because there were A LOT but I didn’t think of it until just now and, as of right now, I don’t know how to time travel. Maybe Future!Me knows how, but so far, she’s not sharing that information with Present!Me because SHE'S RUDE. Anyway, here are some things that I learned from this book:
1. Nero was fucking insane, which I knew, but like even more whackadoo crazy than I thought. I don’t want to spoiler too much but he killed his wife in a horrific fashion and then made a slave who sort of looked like her BECOME her basically? A male slave. So. Yeah.
2. Lord Byron was in this, of course, but was not the one behaving badly in terms of the breakup? Or at least he looked better by comparison...sort of? Honestly, I would read an entire book about his exploits with Catherine Lamb, does that exist?
3. Timothy Dexter, who I had never heard of, was delightfully crazy in a way that sort of reminds me of Trump but Timothy Dexter doesn’t make me want to vomit out of my eyeballs so I guess it’s not the same at all. For instance, he wrote an autobiography where he didn’t use any punctuation, and when someone pointed it out, he included just a full page of punctuation in the second printing. Like, all the punctuation, so people could pick and choose what they needed and put it in themselves. SO UNINTENTIONALLY HILARIOUS, it’s just the best.
4. Eleanor of Aquitaine was BADASS.
5. The parts about Debbie Reynolds and Elizabeth Taylor’s friendship legit made me tear up.
6. ICE CASTLE. Seriously, just read this.
If you at all enjoy reading anything about history or horrible breakups or just historical figures behaving badly, all written like you were gossiping with a friend, this book is perfect for you. Pick it up!
January 9, 2016
I bought this book because I'd just finished the Imperial Radch series and I needed to read something that I could not possibly compare to it (the comparison was bound to be unfavorable; the Radch books are super great). This book fit the bill perfectly.
This is part of the subcategory of nonfiction that I think of as "funny history anecdotes." Sarah Vowell is obviously the queen of this particular niche, and if you like her work, you'll probably like this, too. Vowell is more funny history anecdotes plus travel, while Wright, at least here, is funny history anecdotes plus some fortunately brief self-help type stuff, but they're both funny and that's what counts.
I just had a lot of fun reading this, is the thing. I laughed a lot, I learned some great stuff that I will have to try really hard not to share with the next ten people I meet, I read long passages out loud to my extremely patient spouse. I even got to hate Norman Mailer more than I already did, which I had thought was impossible. Time well spent, all the way around.
The only part of the book that didn't work for me (although I should note that I skipped the chapter on Wilde and Bosie on the grounds that that entire thing was terrible and sad and I just don't want to think about it anymore ever) was the part where Wright talked to me, the reader, about breaking up -- about how it is better to have loved and lost, basically, and no matter how badly you act you're never going to make a sex doll of your ex and then behead it, so you're definitely not the worst breaker-upper ever. But, okay, I've been married for a really long time, to a woman I met when I was 16. "Boring middle-aged happily married lesbian" isn't really the target audience for the self-help parts. But I can see them being useful if you have recently broken up.
And whether your breakups are long passed, recent past, or still in the future, there's solid value in reading about all the hilarious, awful, or hilarawful things you haven't done/won't do. Like marrying Eddie Fisher or pretending your still-living partner is actually a ghost.
And now I need to stop writing this review before I just start copying and pasting my favorite bits. Seriously, this book is FULL of funny history anecdotes. If this is at all the kind of thing you like, read it.
This is part of the subcategory of nonfiction that I think of as "funny history anecdotes." Sarah Vowell is obviously the queen of this particular niche, and if you like her work, you'll probably like this, too. Vowell is more funny history anecdotes plus travel, while Wright, at least here, is funny history anecdotes plus some fortunately brief self-help type stuff, but they're both funny and that's what counts.
I just had a lot of fun reading this, is the thing. I laughed a lot, I learned some great stuff that I will have to try really hard not to share with the next ten people I meet, I read long passages out loud to my extremely patient spouse. I even got to hate Norman Mailer more than I already did, which I had thought was impossible. Time well spent, all the way around.
The only part of the book that didn't work for me (although I should note that I skipped the chapter on Wilde and Bosie on the grounds that that entire thing was terrible and sad and I just don't want to think about it anymore ever) was the part where Wright talked to me, the reader, about breaking up -- about how it is better to have loved and lost, basically, and no matter how badly you act you're never going to make a sex doll of your ex and then behead it, so you're definitely not the worst breaker-upper ever. But, okay, I've been married for a really long time, to a woman I met when I was 16. "Boring middle-aged happily married lesbian" isn't really the target audience for the self-help parts. But I can see them being useful if you have recently broken up.
And whether your breakups are long passed, recent past, or still in the future, there's solid value in reading about all the hilarious, awful, or hilarawful things you haven't done/won't do. Like marrying Eddie Fisher or pretending your still-living partner is actually a ghost.
And now I need to stop writing this review before I just start copying and pasting my favorite bits. Seriously, this book is FULL of funny history anecdotes. If this is at all the kind of thing you like, read it.
January 2, 2022
Bardzo nierówna. Niektóre historie bardzo ciekawe inne wcale mnie nie zainteresowały.
May 20, 2018
Çok, çok, çok sevdiğiniz eski sevgilinizin ardından yanaklarınızdan süzülen yaşlarla yatağınıza uzanıyorsanız durumla bu kadar iyi başa çıktığınız için kendinizi tebrik etmelisiniz. Çok daha fenasını yapıyor olabilirdiniz. Çok daha fenasını. Eski sevgilinizin kellesini alıyor, hiç tanımadığınız tipleri hadım ediyor veya bir şişme bebekle yeni bir hayata yelken açıyor olabilirdiniz. SİZ BİR KAHRAMANSINIZ. (arka kapak)💔
💔Normal kabul edilen bir çiftin ayrılığında gözyaşları sel olabilir, birbirinin arkasından içip içip kötü sözler sarf edebilirsiniz, belki daha sonra utanacağınız mektuplar ya da mesajlar atabilirsiniz ama tahmin edilebilir rezillik sınırları (bence) en fazla bunlar olur. Ne kadar kötü şeyler yapmış olursak olalım, kimsenin bu kitapta yer alan on üç çiftte olduğu kadar kötü olamayacağına eminim. Yazar Jennifer Wright bizlere tarihte yaşamış ve rezillikte çığır açmış 13 berbat ayrılık hikayesini öyle eğlenceli bir üslupla aktarıyor ki okurken kıkırdamalarıma engel olamadım. Keyif için Roma’yı da yakan pislik Neron’dan nefret ederken, canım Oscar Wilde için içiniz kan ağlayabiliyor bu gerçek anektodları okuduğunuzda. Evlilikten nefret ettiği için mutlu çiftleri buzdan saraya çırılçıplak kapatan manyak bir Çariçe, dönemin en ünlü bestecisi olmasına rağmen elinde bir parça kanlı bezle dolaşan bir meczuba dönüşen adam ve zilli (en kibar tabiri kullandım burada, kendisine çok sinirlendim çünkü) Elizabeth Taylor… Benim gibi tarihin eğlenceli yönlerini okumayı seviyorsanız “Böyle mi Olacaktı?” kesinlikle tavsiyemdir. Kitap Domingo Yayınevi ’nden çıktı ve başarılı çevirisi de Zeynep Yeşiltuna’ya ait.
“Nihayetinde sadece üç şeyin önemi var. Ne kadar sevdiğiniz, ne kadar nazik yaşadığınız ve kısmetiniz olmayan şeyleri ne kadar zarifçe bıraktığınız.” (BUDA)
💔Normal kabul edilen bir çiftin ayrılığında gözyaşları sel olabilir, birbirinin arkasından içip içip kötü sözler sarf edebilirsiniz, belki daha sonra utanacağınız mektuplar ya da mesajlar atabilirsiniz ama tahmin edilebilir rezillik sınırları (bence) en fazla bunlar olur. Ne kadar kötü şeyler yapmış olursak olalım, kimsenin bu kitapta yer alan on üç çiftte olduğu kadar kötü olamayacağına eminim. Yazar Jennifer Wright bizlere tarihte yaşamış ve rezillikte çığır açmış 13 berbat ayrılık hikayesini öyle eğlenceli bir üslupla aktarıyor ki okurken kıkırdamalarıma engel olamadım. Keyif için Roma’yı da yakan pislik Neron’dan nefret ederken, canım Oscar Wilde için içiniz kan ağlayabiliyor bu gerçek anektodları okuduğunuzda. Evlilikten nefret ettiği için mutlu çiftleri buzdan saraya çırılçıplak kapatan manyak bir Çariçe, dönemin en ünlü bestecisi olmasına rağmen elinde bir parça kanlı bezle dolaşan bir meczuba dönüşen adam ve zilli (en kibar tabiri kullandım burada, kendisine çok sinirlendim çünkü) Elizabeth Taylor… Benim gibi tarihin eğlenceli yönlerini okumayı seviyorsanız “Böyle mi Olacaktı?” kesinlikle tavsiyemdir. Kitap Domingo Yayınevi ’nden çıktı ve başarılı çevirisi de Zeynep Yeşiltuna’ya ait.
“Nihayetinde sadece üç şeyin önemi var. Ne kadar sevdiğiniz, ne kadar nazik yaşadığınız ve kısmetiniz olmayan şeyleri ne kadar zarifçe bıraktığınız.” (BUDA)
June 18, 2023
30 Books in 30 Days, Vol. 3
Book 12/30
As always with Jennifer Wright, I laughed the whole book. She also has really good luck with audiobook narrators. Hillary Huber does a great job with her sly (and sometimes not so sly) humor.
This book does exactly what it says on the tin. There are thirteen essays (and a small introduction) detailing in Wright's signature style thirteen of the worst breakups throughout recorded history, starting with Nero in Rome all the way up to Elizabeth Taylor, Debbie Reynolds, and Eddie Fisher. Her style is very informal, and if you don't like it, you won't like the book, no matter how interesting the history is. It's just a very distinct style, but one that I happen to love.
Like with her last book, the one about murderous women throughout history, I consumed this incredibly, incredibly fast, so fast that I really wasn't able to retain much, and because there wasn't really an 'oomph' kind of theme with it, it just ended up being a good time. That lack of oomph is why I'm holding off the fifth star, because I know she can deliver the oomph when she wants to. She did it in her book about pandemics, and I'm really hoping she'll do it again in Mrs. Restell, which was published in March, like with the pandemic book, has a lot of relevance to our current day situation.
[4.5 stars]
Book 12/30
As always with Jennifer Wright, I laughed the whole book. She also has really good luck with audiobook narrators. Hillary Huber does a great job with her sly (and sometimes not so sly) humor.
This book does exactly what it says on the tin. There are thirteen essays (and a small introduction) detailing in Wright's signature style thirteen of the worst breakups throughout recorded history, starting with Nero in Rome all the way up to Elizabeth Taylor, Debbie Reynolds, and Eddie Fisher. Her style is very informal, and if you don't like it, you won't like the book, no matter how interesting the history is. It's just a very distinct style, but one that I happen to love.
Like with her last book, the one about murderous women throughout history, I consumed this incredibly, incredibly fast, so fast that I really wasn't able to retain much, and because there wasn't really an 'oomph' kind of theme with it, it just ended up being a good time. That lack of oomph is why I'm holding off the fifth star, because I know she can deliver the oomph when she wants to. She did it in her book about pandemics, and I'm really hoping she'll do it again in Mrs. Restell, which was published in March, like with the pandemic book, has a lot of relevance to our current day situation.
[4.5 stars]
March 1, 2016
I picked this up b/c I thought it looked like it would be a humorous, informative read. Wright's humor probably works well in magazines and newspapers where she has a day job as a columnist, but I didn't feel like the history of ancient Rome and her one-liners mixed well. Maybe the rest of the book was OK but I couldn't get past the first 14 pages....The premise of the book seemed a little far-fetched -- I guess trying to make modern readers feel better about their breakups b/c historical figures went through far nuttier ones...?? eh, I dunno. I think you'd have to have some background in the specific areas of history and literature she's referencing to know what she's talking about for a lot of this book. She tries to give a humorous account of the background for the figures she's profiling, but it just makes me roll my eyes b/c it doesn't work.
October 23, 2018
And now I MUST read everything Norman Mailer
Audiobook #180
Audiobook #180
July 15, 2021
dobrze się przy niej bawiłam - zabawna, przyjemna, polecam po rozstaniu, bo dzięki niej stwierdziłam, że w sumie nie ma ze mną aż tak źle.
January 21, 2019
If you liked Jennifer Wright's Get Well Soon: History's Worst Plagues and the Heroes Who Fought Them, you'll be sure to enjoy this one too. It's light, enjoyable, but also mildly educational. I never knew that Norman Mailer was such an ass, for example, or that Oskar Kokoschka was such an oddball. Ok, I probably could have guessed that an Austrian artist would have his eccentricities, but building a life-size sex doll based on an ex is likely a bit more eccentric than most.
The obvious examples of relationships gone awry are here — Anne Boleyn's ill-fated dalliance with King Henry VIII, Elizabeth Taylor and, well, everybody — but there are plenty of famous historical figures whose love lives were previously unknown to me that I enjoyed seeing fleshed out here.
Is it gossipy and somewhat tabloid in nature? Certainly. But it's also scandalous fun — if you're into that sort of thing.
The obvious examples of relationships gone awry are here — Anne Boleyn's ill-fated dalliance with King Henry VIII, Elizabeth Taylor and, well, everybody — but there are plenty of famous historical figures whose love lives were previously unknown to me that I enjoyed seeing fleshed out here.
Is it gossipy and somewhat tabloid in nature? Certainly. But it's also scandalous fun — if you're into that sort of thing.
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