When I went and fixed my computer, a couple things happened. One of which was losing all my MUCK information. This includes my character password for Bandari, and the login information. I got the login data, but since my password was reset . . . and I, like the dumbnuts I am occasionally, forgot to copy it down ("The program will remember it!") . . .

I've been locked OUT of Bandari by such folly.

However, I haven't exactly been all that eager to drop in. There's a lot of things going on, sure, but none of them really involve Peter. They're private business concerning people. And before that, it was . . . um, a lot of crap which fell down at once and buried a plotline I'd set up. I'd thought about unburying it, but gave up on it when I discovered there wasn't many people logged in at once.

And some of the people I was hoping to get involved very likely STILL haven't logged in. Who? Well . . . ah, ANYONE more than myself and Abby who could make it. I could have worked with anyone else, but I really wanted to have more than two people making the trip. It didn't look like it was happening; the next time I get on I hear that there's something else going on which has a lot of players away and absorbed.

I'm NOT saying you shouldn't, but I just . . . lost the heart to actually try anymore.

Sorry.

I know, I know, it took me way too long to get my act together and edit this! Still, here it is... The log from Norton's journey to see what the hell had happened to Kanyaga after she left for her village, to ask her shaman about marrying the cat.

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“Bring out yer dead!”
  “Here’s one.”
    “I’m not dead.”
“’Ere, he says he’s not dead.”
  “Yes he is.”
    “I’m not!”
“He isn’t.”
  “Well, he will be soon, he’s very ill.”
    “I’m getting better!”

— from Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Okay, this journal has been very little more than an angst sink for the past month or so. Sorry about that. I don’t want to spend many words revisiting the “napalm the bridges on your way out” posts, but I do stand by both the positions and the actions that I’ve taken. This has been my first time running a MUCK, but it’s far from my first time administrating an online system, and I’m not naïve about user conflict. While I’ve made mistakes with Bandari, nothing I have learned or observed since our July 4th fireworks show makes me feel I made substantially wrong calls in handling it.

· · ·

In a previous post I suggested the idea of starting a new MUCK which would incorporate a lot of the spirit—and as it’s developing, probably even some of the locale—of Bandari into it. As most if not all of you know, that’s being planned more actively.

There’s a wiki up for it, which is currently at http://www.ranea.org:2500; I suspect this is going to become the actual web site for the system when it moves to its own domain. I’d like to get some discussion from current Bandari players going, particularly on some of the “hot button” topics like what we’d like to see as in theme and out of theme.

The Excursion Society MUCK will be canted even more toward the pulp adventure side of things (hopefully), and I’d like to nail down with the players just what we expect that to mean and not mean. On the one hand, blatant magic tended to piss some players off; on the other, anyone who’s actually read pulp knows that some pretty freaky things happen on those adventures—the key seems to be less what is and isn’t possible as how characters react to the extraordinary.

One thing that I’ve been asked about that I don’t have a good answer for yet is the transition timeline. There’s a database set up for ESM and programs are being put in place, and I’m working on the skeleton for Cracked Conch Cay and the clubhouse area—but I’d really like to have those built, even if not fleshed out, before inviting people in. And at first, it will be invitation-only, to currently active Bandari players. (Unlike Bandari, ESM will have guest accounts available when it’s fully open.) I’ll try to get people there as soon as possible, and helping with writing. Some of my ideas, like the issue ticket system, are arguably rather ambitious, and probably shouldn’t be allowed to develop in a vacuum. :)

I’m aware that the more people are expecting ESM to happen the less motivation there is for people to be hanging around Bandari, and I’m sorry about that. Having said that, thumb-twiddling isn’t mandated. Characters who may make the transition to ESM have an opportunity to set those plots up (which is what I’m doing, in part, with Mahogany). And, characters who don’t make that transition could potentially have their “stories” brought to a close if players desire. Also, keep in mind that if the idea of reincarnating some of Bandari as a building project stays around, even characters who literally won’t fit on Cracked Conch Cay—like Kanyaga—could still be around as secondaries. I’m hoping all of you will choose to make the transition, or at least give it a chance.

One final consideration point: do people think having a separate LiveJournal like this would be a good idea for ESM as well, should discussion be kept entirely on the wiki (or in-game), or is there a third alternative I should consider?

Sofie is leaving Bandari. Leave a message at the beep and pretend you care. Beep.

Comments, Explanations, Clarifications

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Some people have asked me what happened, with myself and Kashka.

Originally there was a post on this community which detailed the conflict with Kashka, which ended with Kashka repeatedly @booting me from the MUCK (for those who aren't experienced in MUCK administration, that means forcing a disconnect from the server) and then @newpasswording me (which means that I couldn't log back on again). The post also included a log of the incident, to allow other readers (including Kanyaga) to decide if it was appropriate for me to be kicked off the game.

Kanyaga demanded that the post be removed by me, and I did so. Since then, Kanyaga has responded to this in two ways: First, Kashka was stripped of his wizbit and demoted from admin status; and secondly, I was banned from the MUCK for at least a week.

These facts are noted in Kanyaga's bulletin board post on the MUCK, so I don't feel as if I am revealing anything that hasn't already been made public information to the players on BandariMUCK.

Kashka, apparently, chose to quit the MUCK -- but then reversed himself, as the original post by Kanyaga seems to have been edited to say that Kashka is on a voluntary hiatus. When Kanyaga told me that I would be suspended for a week -- and knowing that Kashka would probably quit the game (because, frankly, it's hard to imagine Kashka wanting to play after losing admin powers) -- I chose not to return to Bandari for several reasons.

The first is that I don't wish to be "that player who made Kashka go away" (or lose his wizbit). Kashka is a long-established player and has OOC ties with nearly everyone on the MUCK, and I'm a relative newbie. I don't wish to play somewhere that I'd feel as if people were resenting me for getting rid of their friend -- EVEN if I was not the one responsible for either Kashka's highly inappropriate and un(wiz)ethical actions, nor for Kanyaga's appropriate response to that abuse.

Secondly, I object to the one-week suspension, as well as the public announcement of it, as it gives the impression that I'd done something worthy of being kicked off the game for a week. It is a partial endorsement of Kashka's actions. And, frankly, I did nothing wrong. The worst I can be accused of is being insufficiently enthused about a particular plot and making one -- ONE! -- comment about it on the OOC channel, and it wasn't even that bad. If that's grounds for a one-week suspension, then BandariMUCK is in more trouble than I thought.

The fact that this choice to not return was publicized by Kanyaga along with the statement of temporary suspension -- as if I were NOT a victim of wizabuse, but had, in fact, done something to actually EARN a suspection -- just adds insult to injury. I really don't appreciate the details of this being an official announcement -- the first! -- on the new MUCK-wide bulletin board, especially as I am clearly unable to respond or even read what is being said about myself there.

I understand that Kanyaga is under the impression that it's "clear" that I logged to abuse my friends that night. Nothing could be farther from the truth, but Kanyaga refuses to believe this, and I suspect that misinterpretation on her part -- along with her angst over her AnthroCon arrangements -- have led her to make the wrong choice in continuing to impose administrative sanctions against me, in effect extending rather than removing the @boot and @newpassword dealt to me by Kashka.

Yes, Kanyaga is at AnthroCon this week -- but so is Kashka, and Kashka has posted a melodramatic "I'm quitting all MUCKs!" post anyway on his LiveJournal. I fail to see why Kanyaga uses "I won't be around due to AnthroCon" as an excuse to further ban me from the MUCK, when the problem is not me to begin with. The problem was Kashka throwing a fit and then using administrative powers to force me off the game.

I feel mistreated by both Kashka and Kanyaga, and for that reason, I don't feel like returning to BandariMUCK. Which is a real shame, because I like the game and (most of) the players a lot. But I don't have any desire to play on a game where I don't feel like I will be treated fairly by the wizard(s).

--Kynn, Elise's player

WARNING : PROFANITIES!

I hate to do this, but damnit, this has been festering in me for a long time. I'm very unhappy with what has happened to Bandari.

Let me start from the beginning. Bandari first started as a wonderful idea, the sort of 'realistic' MUCK I could immerse myself in and actually roleplay without worrying about having to take my pants off every ten minutes to keep someone's attention. I put a lot of time, effort, and attention into creating Sofie Anastasia Nakavyshenski. I came up with a backstory, integrated into the MUCK world and its setting, came up with a desc (natch) and also objects, and a reason for Sofie to even be there in the first place.

Things were nice for awhile. Most of the people roleplaying at the time were on the level, so to speak, and, while varying from 'good' to 'poor' roleplaying, still maintained a respectable medium. Then I started running into players who, frankly, were brain-dead and seemed created 'just to be there'. I am not going to name names, because I would be here forever, but let me just say that it seemed like a massive slap in the face. Here I had spent all this time fleshign out and creating a 3-D, living breathing character, and I run into this... cardboard cut-outs of a 'character'.

It upset me but I did not let it bother me that much. But then things started getting weird. Kit, bless her heart, literally begged me to make Sofie transform into a giant. I was dead-set against it, and stated so to her for quite a while until I finally gave in and let her do it. So what happened? Sofie just turned into this lame fetish character I had no desire to play, and I spent much more time away from Bandari than I ever have before or since. I had no desire to even log in and exist. After quite a long time of Sofie showing up maybe once a week (at best), I finally got Kit to bring her back to normal.

There were so many things that upset me about that entire turn of events. Not only do I not like transformation in and of itself, but I thought it had absolutely no place on a MUCK striving for some sort of 'realism'. I ended up compromising my own values and beliefs to please a friend, and though I do like Kit a lot, I still feel guilty for giving in.

Even after Sofie went back to normal, I still had a much-diminished desire to roleplay there. It seemed like it went from being 'realistic' to out-and-out fetish fantasy, which was something I, honestly, have no desire to be a part of. That is not why I signed up for Bandari.

It was not long after this when Rheoryn started transforming every couple of minutes. Rheoryn is a good friend of mine, I like him/her a lot, but this was not something I felt should be here, and it seemed like it was ruining the MUCK in my mind. Consequently, it lead to me reducing my already-reduced time online, and, after the first week or two, I started ignoring Rheoryn/Joka. I like him a lot, but when I get into these situations I usually just retreat and stay away from things that upset me.

Not only was Rheoryn going from male to female but also to a giant form that was some sort of 'death spirit'. I don't know, nor do I care, what the reasoning behind this was, but it upset me, greatly. It was like, 'Oh, well, fuck the realism, let's just bring spirits in and do a bunch of crazy shit for fun'. Crazy shit is not why I signed up for Bandari, not at all. If I wanted that, I would have gotten in it page-RPs with people on Tapestries and FurryMUCK.

Eventually Rheoryn settled on being female, which still does not settle very well with me. I don't like the idea of transformation in any way on a MUCK that claims to be 'based in reality'. Hell, I am not even happy with the use of any kind of 'majick', whether it is easy or not. Weird potions and that sort of bullshit is perfectly fine with me, but not actual majicks, and people transforming whenever they bloody well feel like it or, hell, people eating other people's souls, or being the incarnated form of some stupid spirit from somewhere in Africa.

Unfortunately, it still continues, and this time, with my beloved Abby. Abby is a very dear friend of mine, but this latest 'Abby grows for some stupid reason' plot is really pissing me off. Not only is it transformation, but now it is attempting to be 'justified by IC science', which means, of course, that pretty soon, every Tom, Dick, and Fuckface is going to be transforming so they can have raunchy whisper sex with each other. There are other things that steam me with this plot. Abby never asked me what I thought of it, and just started doing it. I know it is her decision as her character, but jeez, does my opinion really matter so little as to not even be consulted? Or even asked? Granted, that is a rather minor point, but what pisses me off even more is the fact that people try to justify it. Not only do they do this with science, but they also call the K-card, 'Kanyaga said it was okay'. They don't say that as a defense, they say that as JUSTIFYING TO ME WHY I SHOULD LIKE IT. I am not a bloody robot who can be told what I should and should not like or agree with and that whether or not Kanyaga or Kashka approves of it is, frankly, irrelevent. I don't really care if Kanyaga said it is okay, that is NOT GOING TO MAKE ME LIKE IT NO MATTER WHAT. Grudging acceptance may be acquired, but not liking it.

It gets worse! Several times I have been told 'You like Abby, you like big girls, so you MUST LIKE ABBY AS A BIG GIRL.' Goddamnit, NO! Transformation should have no place in a MUCK that does (or, at one point, did) strive for realism! Not only does that show a huge ignorance of my feelings on the subject, but it is also a massive insult to me, personally, when people tell me what I should like. I'm not a goddamn robot who can be told what I should and should not like. I DON'T like transformation, I DON'T want Abby big, I DON'T automatically like big girls and Sofie is not there just to be some sort of Russian whore slut prostitute hooker! If I wanted mindless sex, I would put that in my wixxx, or my desc, or just wander around on Tapestries with a desc that says 'I AM A HOT VIXEN WITH HUGE BOOBS DON'T YOU WANT TO TOUCH MY BOOBS!!!!'. Don't you DARE tell me what I should and should not like, whether you use some sort of perverted logic justification or 'Kanyaga said it was okay'. It is like if I started walking around the MUCK doing whatever the fuck I felt like and whenever someone complained that I would start insulting them rather than listen. That is not how things work!

For those of you curious, yes I am ignoring IC interaction. I don't want to be around Abby in IC public, I don't want to be in IC public at any rate. The Bandari I joined no longer seems to be the one I am on.

And before you go 'well y don't u suggest a way 2 make it better lol', stop right there. Don't give me any advice, don't tell me to 'leave if u don't like it'. I am voicing my opinion with the hopes that it will make the people who read it think. If they don't, oh well. If they think I'm just bitching for attention, oh-fucking-well. I don't really care anymore. I've been holding this in far too long. Bandari does not feel like a place I want to roleplay anymore.

It's been fun. You know where to find me if you want to say hi. Good luck and all that.

--Elise/Nigel/Tetemeko/Virgil

To recap, the problems I identified were along the lines of:

• No clear set of rules for players to build new areas
• No clear set of expectations for “how to play”
• Problems coordinating multi-player roleplay sessions

(I’m counting my observation about Bandari not really being a macrophile MUCK as part of the “how to play” problem.) Other problems sometimes feed off of these, of course—most notably the problem of players who only show up a few times. I suspect realistically a retention rate of 33% is good—i.e., only one of three players who create characters actually become regulars—but we’re below that now. (When I did an informal run on statistics in mid-May, we had a retention rate of 38%, but it’d be around 23% now.)

To that, people also added:

• No reliable way to communicate with all players (not everyone reads the wiki, or this LJ)
• No real “social center”

A quick bandage

Since it’s been observed that the MUCK itself is the only medium that players are guaranteed to be connected to, I’ve dusted off a global bulletin board system. This isn’t as “in-character” as one might like, but I suspect it’s mostly going to be for OOC coordination. (There’s nothing to prevent more IC-ish notices, I suppose, but we’ll talk about that going forward.) To access this system, simply use the commands +read and +write. (It’s using the venerable “gen-mesgboard” program every Fuzzball MUCK does, so the commands work the same way boards on FurryMUCK do—just remember to type the “+” prefix.)

Having said that, just making this available won’t actually make people think to use it. :) The advantage of an “IC board”—that is, one that’s actually a real notice board that characters would use and pin notices to—is that it’d be in a room description, encouraging you to check it frequently. With this global system, people will have to think to check on their own.

Looking ahead…

I mentioned in a comment that I’ve been thinking about an earlier MUCK idea that I had, years ago. That idea is effectively set in the same world that Bandari is, but its focal point was the island mansion clubhouse of an adventuring society. Players would be members, guests, employees or clients of this society.

Obviously, the clubhouse itself would have been the social center, and it would have most of the features Camilla talked about. It also wouldn’t have had Bandari’s building problem, necessarily, for two reasons: the island is very small and would start completely built-out, so there simply wouldn’t be any building projects there. The idea was that players who wanted to create new areas to adventure in would be able to create them on their own as entirely standlone projects. These, once approved, could be very “hooked in” to the MUCK’s navigation system by setting a few properties somewhere—then players would be able to take a boat (or airship or whatever) from the club island to the entrance location of the new area. And, one of the original ideas of that MUCK was that everyone had a “hidden agenda,” a secret, specific motivation for being involved with the society. The idea would be to lessen the problem of the “awkward idle,” when characters who are perfectly interesting in and of themselves don’t actually have any motivation to be interacting with one another—so they don’t.

So upon reading this, people might reasonably think: are you considering reviving this idea? While I’m hedging my bets, I’d be lying if I said no.

The one big problem is that the Excursion Society was manifestly not “macro.” (Big problem! Ha!) Now, this could be addressed to a large (ha!) degree by making Bandari itself be one of the building projects that could be reached by boat. Many of the characters would still fit on the society island itself and even some of the plots could still fit (for an example, Silas experimenting on Abby). But, there’d obviously be more than a few things that wouldn’t fit, quite literally—characters who would be “stranded” in the Bandari area, like Kanyaga and N’drana, and projects associated with them (Sharabu, N’drana’s club, etc.). This could have the problem of fracturing the player base if some characters chose to stay exclusively in Bandari. Of course, I’d be less reticent to advertise the Excursion Society as it wouldn’t have the potential stigma of being considered a “fetish MUCK,” which might (eventually) counterbalance that.

Thoughts?